Evidence for rear facing at 4+ for a very small child.

[Somuchgoo]

My (just) turned 4yo is still rear facing. She's not asked to turn around, despite having an older sibling who is forward facing.

She is very small for her age (1st centile) and will probably 'fit in terms of weight and height for several years (probably 7-8!). She's got some medical issues/had major neurosurgery, which means I'm a bit paranoid about significant bangs to her head.

I'd assumed I'd turn her at 4, but she's comfortable and happy and fits fine. She's ngoing to school this year, of that's a factor in terms of embarrassment.

Is it a practicality thing turning them at 4 or are there continued safely advantages to waiting? If she's happy and it's safer, then I guess why turn her. But equally, because of heath (and being tiny) she's babied quite a lot for her age?

She'll probably fit until she's 7-8, not another 7-8 years!

I wouldn't turn the seat around if she's happy. Rear facing is safer.

if you're on Facebook, join car seat safety uk.
I'll be rear facing mine for as long as possible

We know rear facing until 6/7 is safest. So why would you turn your child early and compromise that?

Tbh, that's my view, and why I haven't turned her.

I was wobbling a bit on seeing a relative's child who was turned at 13m, and remembering a thread on MN a few months ago, which was pretty much saying that keeping a 3yo RF was tantamount to abuse, that she'd be bullied for being babied, and that extended RF was ridiculous.

Then my parents have heen asking about when we want to turn her (she's RF in their car too), and I started to wobble.

As long as she's happy being RF, I'm happy keeping her so. If she starts to protest about it, then I'll turn her, but keep her as she is for now.

Shes only 90cm and about 11.5kg. She just feels very small to be rear facing even though she's 4.

If she's happy, why change?

DD was in a harnessed seat until 5 as that's when she reached 16kg. She didn't know any different. Kids don't tend to talk about their carseats...

If she can fit rear facing leave her rear facing.

I changed my DD around when she was just over 4 and she was suddenly car sick. (She then had a growth spurt so wouldn't have fitted anyway.)

Rear facing is safer for everyone regardless of age. If she’s comfortable and in a seat appropriate for her height and weight then there no reason to turn her around.

This. My daughter is 4 and still RF and has never voiced an opinion on it other than to tell me I'm sitting the wrong way! I don't think she's noticed or cares what way other kids sit in their cars.

I'm so confused by your post. Why would you turn her around if she fits well where she is and doesn't want to move?

Oh gosh, she is tiny for nearly 4. I’d keep her rear facing. It’s safer for everyone actually, even adults, but it becomes impractical after a certain size. One way of looking at it is that you’re lucky she’ll fit in the rear facing seat longer :)
Tell your parents you’re going to keep her rear facing another year and then reassess. In your shoes I’d stick with rear facing until she either outgrows the seat or asks to forward face.
Even if you do turn her around now, she’s going to need a harness until she’s at least 100cm and I think there might be a minimum weight too.

Forward facing at 13 months isn’t even legal where I am so don’t compare yourself to your relatives. Your daughter has good carseats that fit her and she’s happy in them. Don’t waste money changes them because she’s small for her age unless she starts talking about it herself.

Keep here rear facing for as long as she is happy with it.
Have you had comments from people IRL about it? My DC's are older now but I remember getting bemused looks and comments about using ERF car seats. I only know one other person who did it and who lives at the other end of the country so I didn't have any allies close by either! It seemed so weird that turning a child to FF facing was seen as a milestone and that everyone did it at the earliest opportunity despite the strong evidence against it.

I would keep her rear facing. My 5.5yr old is still rear facing and will be until her baby sister has outgrown her seat and needs my older daughters seat (probably about another year until that happens). My daughter has never asked to forward face and doesn't have a problem rear facing, I think it's because her younger siblings are still rear facing so it's nice to be the same

No comments in real life because she looks like she's about 2 - until she starts talking 😂

I was just wobbling a bit on it because

a) I have a tendency to be overprotective with her given her medical history and because she seems so tiny

b) the comments from my parents (who will support whatever I decide)

c) it's not so much that my relatives child us making me think that turning them young is ok, but made me wonder whether I'm babying her.

d) the old thread from here going round in my head as that was brutally against ERF. It made me wonder whether I was taking things to extremes. I don't know if anyone remembers it - it was about a woman arguing with her parents about it, and the overwhelming view was that she shouldn't post for child to stay RF, and it was ridiculous at 3+. 😢

I live in a city where there's a lot of extended breastfeeding, babywearing into childhood (I wear my 4yo most days as well), extended rear facing etc, and it's difficult to know whether I'm just in an echo chamber of similar parents sometimes. But even most of them turned round at some point 3ish. So I thought I'd ask wider.

My instinct was to keep her rear facing, so thank you to everyone for backing up my gut feeling in this.

She'll stay exactly as she is.

Ps: seat can go either way, and she's within the weight/size limits for either, so it wouldn't require any additional cost etc. Cost is the least consideration though.