Handhold please (TW)

[SomeoneSomewhere21]

Sorry I wasn’t sure where to post this, I just need a virtual handhold.

On Wednesday I am having my first proper session of EMDR trauma therapy and I’m terrified.
The therapy will focus on a violent sexual abuse incident from over 20 years ago amongst other things.

I’ve met the therapist for an hours introduction and she’s really lovely and I feel comfortable with her but starting the process properly scares the shit out of me.

I’ve struggled on for so long. The grief of losing several people close to me over the last 2 years has really rocked me and heightened everything and I can’t ignore it any more. But I’m so so scared of opening this Pandora’s box of emotions and memories.

Thank you if you’ve got this far, rambling now. If anyone has been through therapy and come out the other side, please reassure me that I’m actually doing the right thing.

Hand hold here. I need therapy. I will have to look into it soon or I won't get through another winter. Good luck.

Thank you.
I’m not sure why now after so long but it gets to the point where it’s taking over every waking (and asleep) moment and I can’t ignore it any more. Hope you can get the help you need too.

Hand hold. I’m doing emdr right now (for Less traumatic things than you, but ones i have had difficulty processing).

i won’t lie, the sessions are tough, and i feel rung out for the rest of the day after (i cry a lot, which exhausts me, but i’ve always at the drop of a hat).

HOWEVER - the therapist always makes sure there is closure with each session, and even after 7 weeks i can feel myself getting lighter - i don’t know how to describe it, but like weight i have been under for so long is starting to lift. I cannot recommend it enough - after a year of just talking therapy which did nothing to help, i really feel like this is having a positive effect. I wouldn’t stop it for the world. Good luck!

Hand hold here. Well done for taking that forward step to your future. The therapist will look after you.

Thank you @RubaiyatOfAnyone that’s really reassuring to hear and I’m sorry you’re going through it too.
I know the sessions will be hard but I’m willing to work through them to get that lighter feeling at the end. I know the ‘stuff’ won’t go away but hopefully it’ll make it easier to live with.

@Paperdolly thank you

I have actually come a long way and have found fasting and controlling my breathing (which affects the vagus nerve which affects pretty much everything) had helped me massively.

I would never have considered fasting until I bumped into an old friend that advised it. It has been little short of a miracle.