I don't want to wake up

[Podengo]

It's all too much. A lifetime of depression and anxiety. I've tried medication. It doesn't work. I'm alone. No-one cares. I have no-one to confide in. I'm a failed parent. I want to go to bed and sleep for ever.

Oh OP, your gp will not be thinking you are wasting their time. They know how hard it can be to ask for help.
You might need a change to your meds if you’re feeling so low. It’s sometimes easier to write down what you want to say and just hand the paper to your gp.
My DH is an only child and is very happy. I’m from a big family and rarely see my siblings. Every situation is individual so please don’t feel you have failed anyone.
Keep posting, we are listening.

He may not understand but this doesn't mean your feelings don't count, they do! A doctor would never think that. They would be happy you made the first step to get help.

Maybe see if your H would go with you to the doctor's to help him understand.

I'm sure that your doctor won't be annoyed with you for having anxiety and depression.
Please make an appointment and get some help. My GP has been endlessly kind and supportive to me with my anxiety. She has listened to me and prescribed medication.