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Original poster

1st night of a long awaited weekend to myself and I feel...

14 replies

SnowyGiveAway · 21/04/2023 20:52

Weird. Guilty? Lonely?

DS and DH are away for the weekend and I have the house to myself all weekend, for the first time in maybe 7 years! I was (am) so excited and looking forward to it. Got in loads of food that my allergic family can't eat, cleaned the house, lit candles, new book, film on netflix, wine, chocolate, no one wanting me for anything, my own time and headspace, peace and quiet...

Why am I wasting it feeling vaguely guilty that I'm not there with them, and unsettled by a quiet house? What is wrong with me 😭

Writing this down so I can process it and feel better. I have nice plans tomorrow. But it's somehow not what I thought it would be!

Someone tell me to stop fretting and take advantage of this very limited moment of me time!!!!

OP posts:
Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 21/04/2023 20:53

You need to get a plan. What film have you wanted to watch for ages? Or sings to listen to loudly? Get that on. Get some food in the god and stick to something. You need to commit and then it'll feel good :)

EssexMamisoa · 21/04/2023 20:57

Stop fretting!!!

I totally get you though. I feel guilty every time I am in the gym even DH has literally offered to look after DC while I nip there.

As above make some plans, check in with DH (and DS) if makes you feel better and try and enjoy yourself :)

MeinKraft · 21/04/2023 20:58

You just need something to binge watch and a glass of wine. I recommend Blue Lights. You'll soon forget you even have a family Grin

Velvian · 21/04/2023 21:00

Have you watched The Lost City? I think it is on Prime. It really made me laugh. That would cheer you up.

I totally understand, I dream if the same, but I think I would probably feel a bit flat if it actually happened. Enjoy that lie in tomorrow morning.

Original poster
SnowyGiveAway · 21/04/2023 21:00

@Hungrycaterpillarsmummy thank you. I have a plan, I've been planning for this for weeks lol. It's just not the way I thought it would be for some reason, I feel fretful and guilty 😭 maybe it. Just takes a while to settle in, and by tomorrow I'll be fully immersed. Tomorrow I have nice things planned with friends, but really thought I'd enjoy a quiet night. It's a bit unnerving in reality.

Thanks for responding to my somewhat pathetic, quite indulgent cry for help!

OP posts:
Original poster
SnowyGiveAway · 21/04/2023 21:01

MeinKraft · 21/04/2023 20:58

You just need something to binge watch and a glass of wine. I recommend Blue Lights. You'll soon forget you even have a family Grin

😁

OP posts:
Original poster
SnowyGiveAway · 21/04/2023 21:02

Velvian · 21/04/2023 21:00

Have you watched The Lost City? I think it is on Prime. It really made me laugh. That would cheer you up.

I totally understand, I dream if the same, but I think I would probably feel a bit flat if it actually happened. Enjoy that lie in tomorrow morning.

The lie in (2 lie ins!) is gonna make it all worthwhile. That, and the fact I cleaned today and it will still be clean tomorrow and the next day. Unheard of

OP posts:
Diversion · 21/04/2023 21:03

You are feeling guilty because you are putting yourself first, something which is not always easy. You sound like you are all prepared, perhaps have a nice soak in the bath or a long shower with a bit of pampering if that is your thing. Remind yourself that you are important too and deserve some "me time". Go and have a wander tomorrow, window shop, have a walk somewhere nice, go and have a quiet coffee with a book, have a lie in and just relax. The weekend will fly and before you know it they will be back and you will be kicking yourself that you did not make the most of your alone time. Please do try and enjoy 😀

Original poster
SnowyGiveAway · 21/04/2023 21:05

Diversion · 21/04/2023 21:03

You are feeling guilty because you are putting yourself first, something which is not always easy. You sound like you are all prepared, perhaps have a nice soak in the bath or a long shower with a bit of pampering if that is your thing. Remind yourself that you are important too and deserve some "me time". Go and have a wander tomorrow, window shop, have a walk somewhere nice, go and have a quiet coffee with a book, have a lie in and just relax. The weekend will fly and before you know it they will be back and you will be kicking yourself that you did not make the most of your alone time. Please do try and enjoy 😀

Those and very wise (and kind) words. Thank you

OP posts:
RadDarwazeh · 21/04/2023 21:08

I was in this situation today. DS at nursery, DH at work and a day off work for me. What helped was planning as others have said. I'd relax too but day to myself eg "at 11 I'll get some brunch cooked for myself" "at 1 I'll check the laundry situation". Even though I did do some home jobs they were needing doing and I felt proud of myself having done them but also managed a bit of a relax too! Enjoy it, OP!

Davestwattymissus · 21/04/2023 21:08

Don't do what I do when DH goes on a rare night away....plan to have a lovely evening watching a film or reading a book, or doing some pampering, but then while away the evening looking at my stupid phone and whats apping friends, and then feel regretful about my wasted evening vs the one I should have had!

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 21/04/2023 21:09

I think you may have done it the wrong way round though! I'd have planned night with friends tonight then recoup tomorrow and Sunday.
Hope you enjoy yourself though op. You are allowed to rest!

JustAJokeLikeOnTopGear · 21/04/2023 21:10

I suggest you put your phone in another room, you’ll make so much more of the evening. Have a lovely weekend. x

Original poster
SnowyGiveAway · 21/04/2023 21:15

Haha, maybe I have done it wrong! I made a big thing of telling people I'm not drinking or going out this precious weekend, my day tomorrow is a spa day. Maybe I took the wrong tack on this one 😁

Thank you all. I'm going to heed the advice to put my phone down which is good advice. I think spending the last 90 minutes glued to social media has not helped.

Thank you all for the advice. I'm going to make of most of my me time on behalf of some of you who might be in the parenting trenches this weekend - I won't waste it feeling guilty!

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