Why doesn't my 3yo want to talk about nursery staff?

[AliceTheCamelHasFiveHumps]

So we were chatting the other day. My DD is 3y4m. We were asking about our lives. I asked her things like... Who is the loudest person you know? who gives the best cuddles? etc all happily answered.But when i asked "who's the nicest adult at nursery" she replied with "we don't need to talk about nursery", so we carried on talking about other people and her life.
She's also done this before basically something along the lines of not wanting to discuss the staff. Se'll talk about about other children and what she does there. But just not the adults.

FWIW the staff seem to genuinely like DD, with one in particular seeking her out at home time, to say they were leaving (their job) and they will miss DD and hope to see her around etc. Now yes, they may have done that with every child, but I do think they genuinely like DD

Do you think the not wanting to discuss staff something that I should be concerned about?

She said ‘we don’t need to talk about nursery?’ That’s an oddly formal sentence for a three year old!

It may be that she feels awkward being asked ‘who is the nicest at nursery.’ It’s a bit like some parents will say ‘who do you love best, mummy or daddy?’ It makes the child feel embarrassed/awkward.

How odd she would say that sentence! Bit much for a kid her age!

Ha ha she's a funny one with language. Just today she said "it's absolutely ridiculous that I have dropped this ice-cream all over my t-shirt! What a mess!" 🤣

Maybe it is a " I can't choose so I'll deflect it " thing.

It may be that she feels awkward being asked ‘who is the nicest at nursery.’ It’s a bit like some parents will say ‘who do you love best, mummy or daddy?’ It makes the child feel embarrassed/awkward.

Could well be this. My eldest who is nearly 8 is very much like this and even at 3, would have found questions like this awkward and would have avoided answering.

How many hours a day is she there, OP?

Mon, Wed, Thur 6 hrs each and 3hr on a Fri. So 18 total.
.

...21.

Honestly, at 3 she probably doesn't notice the staff much at all, or remember them as distinct individuals with their own personalities. They're just there as background to all the fun she's having learning.

When I ask my kids about kindergarten (now they're older and at school) they can't remember the teachers at all; even though at the time these teachers were so close and kind and amazing to them!!

It's Theory of Mind, totally normal for a 3 year old to not really 'see' or notice others much. Theory of mind (for Neurotypical children) develops continuously throughout childhood (especially age 2 - 5) and into late adolescence as the synapses (neuronal connections) in the prefrontal cortex develop.

Children seem to develop theory of mind skills sequentially. The first skill to develop is the ability to recognize that others have diverse desires. Children are able to recognize that others have diverse beliefs soon after. The next skill to develop is recognizing that others have access to different knowledge bases. Finally, children are able to understand that others may have false beliefs and that others are capable of hiding emotions.

[from wikipedia, btw]