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Is friend copying me?

14 replies

youllfindanotherlifetolive · 11/04/2023 23:48

I’m not bigging myself up, believe me I don’t think that highly of myself but just some examples of how I feel she’s taking parts of my personality - and this is just one day, there’s more than this.

She asked what outfit I was wearing to an event we’re going to, I showed her my ASOS order and she said good shout and she’ll wear something similar. She then said not long after I’m going to buy a certain branded item - the exact item that was also in the ASOS order I’d showed her.

There’s a certain sport I love and I go watch it semi regularly and she had never been to a game until I suggested it. She’s been again with her other friend and constantly brings it up about how much she loves it.

I love a certain singer, the music is so far from what genre she listens to. Now she loves this singer as well.

I went blonde and then so did she. When I bought a new car and a new house she also did the same within months. I got a new job (she’d been in her job a year at that point) and then she decided she needed a new job.

Maybe I’m paranoid, I wrote off the house and job as something anyone would do, but then I just see more examples and it makes me question it.

OP posts:
CeriB82 · 12/04/2023 06:43

It shows you have good taste!

my friend has a SIL who does this. We find it pretty funny!

StormiDayz · 12/04/2023 07:06

She might just look to you for inspiration. It's annoying though. A school mum friend I'm not as close with anymore is the same with me. I thought the first few things were coincidences. If I wore something different, next day she'd be wearing it. Same coat, earrings, hairstyle. Even perfume. Then I replaced my bed so the next day she had a new bed. If I change my WhatsApp profile pic, she'll change hers to a similar one to me, if it's a selfie of me on my own, with my husband, kids, hers will be the same. So I have no doubt she's copying, but I don't get why.

ImSweetEnoughDarlin · 12/04/2023 07:25

We had one of these in our group as teenagers, no one really liked her. It was fucking weird.

youllfindanotherlifetolive · 12/04/2023 19:18

She’s kind of a competitive person too so I didn’t think she would be the type to copy. Maybe she does it but tries to one up, like I get a new car, but her new car is newer.

OP posts:
GoodChat · 12/04/2023 19:29

I don't think she's copying you. You've just shown her things she wouldn't have seen herself and she's liked them. There's nothing wrong with that. Isn't that the point of friendships - you learn each others likes and tend to drift to people who enjoy similar things?

She didn't buy a house on impulse, did she. There's no issue with her getting a new car. I don't understand.

bevelino · 12/04/2023 19:32

Some friends are insecure with low self esteem. I had a heart to heart with my friend who bought the same bag, coat, watch, glasses, car and shoes as me and she would even order the same food as me when dining out.

It is not from a bad place but my friend said that she wanted to copy my style because she never trusted herself to make her own choices.

PJRules · 12/04/2023 19:33

You can't really say anything anyway without sounding crazy.

Maybe she looking to you for inspiration. Try suggesting things she'd look great in, send a link to a dress with 'I saw this and thought of you' and see how she reacts. Be genuine though, see if she just needs help finding her own thing.

Comfies · 12/04/2023 19:35

I'd find that a bit annoying too tbh. Do something bonkers and see if she copies you 😂

Riapia · 12/04/2023 19:52

If you were nasty (like me) you could have loads of fun with her.
Show her things that nobody could possibly want to wear, over priced, and convince her that you are about to order them. Present her with the bait in a convincing way.
😁😁

SeeWhatYouGetWhenYouAskAStupidQuestion · 12/04/2023 19:53

She's insecure and unable to make her own choices, so she gets inspiration from yours. It's meant to be flattery but it would piss me off if someone ever did that with me.

youllfindanotherlifetolive · 12/04/2023 20:17

GoodChat · 12/04/2023 19:29

I don't think she's copying you. You've just shown her things she wouldn't have seen herself and she's liked them. There's nothing wrong with that. Isn't that the point of friendships - you learn each others likes and tend to drift to people who enjoy similar things?

She didn't buy a house on impulse, did she. There's no issue with her getting a new car. I don't understand.

She actually did did move house on impulse. She got a cash buyer too and then bought a new build so she’d decided and done it within 3 months.

OP posts:
thebaneofmylifeisacat · 12/04/2023 21:43

Single white female op!

Watch your dog and your dh!! Avoid basements too

CeriB82 · 13/04/2023 07:00

Id buy a really expensive handbag, tell her then send it back and not say anything. See what happens and put her out of pocket!

Creepyrosemary · 13/04/2023 07:13

You really need to borrow/rent a few really expensive items - handbags, clothes, the newest Tesla.....

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