Can I salvage some form of breast feeding/breast milk?

[haveirriversibly]

Baby born Monday

Attempted EBF until the Wednesday, when she was diagnosed with tongue tie and we had this cut the same day

Wednesday evening it was too painful from tongue tie damage to BF, given formula from bottle (taken well)

Thursday breast fed all day, but very little nappy output and developing jaundice.

Spoke with LLL and an IBFLC and both advised that I should pump as baby not effectively obtaining milk due to tongue tie issues (the cut isn't an instant fix). Was advised to triple feed 3 hourly (breast feed, pump/hand express and top up). At this stage the entire BF journey had ruined the first days of my babies life and had me in tears continually, so I decided enough was enough and to formula feed.

FF since Thursday night, going well and lots of nappy output and jaundice resolving. (Have had medical input for jaundice and they are not concerned).

Was fully resolved on not having anything further to do with breastfeeding as it's been so upsetting and painful so far, but just had the instinct to get up and pump and have taken off 120mls in 15 mins.

I am wondering if there is a way that I can do some pumping and give this in bottles alongside formula. I do not feel at this time I want to breastfeed from the breast, nor do I want to be pumping 8x daily. However, I would consider pumping 3 or 4 times daily instead?

So is this plausible? Baby has say 8 bottles a day, and 4 are formula and 4 are expressed breast milk?

Thanks if you've managed to read this. It's been a rough week.

I'm sorry you've had such a rough week.

Hopefully there will be people with more experience posting, but I was exclusively pumping for 3 months and the 8-12 times a day recommendation is to ensure your supply doesn't drop. The first few weeks are the important ones for establishing supply. I don't blame you for not wanting to do it but I don't think anyone could guarantee that your supply would be maintained with 3-4 sessions per day. You might just need to try and see how it goes, if you're ok with possibly needing to move completely to formula.

The things I was told to do to boost supply was ensure that at least one session was between 2-4am, lots of skin to skin (generally, not necessarily during pumping), pumping from both sides at once and doing what's called a "power pump" where you alternate between pumping and breast massage for about an hour. I rented a hospital grade pump and think it made a big difference.

Sorry you've had such a rough start. Yes, you can mixed feed like that. There are different opinions on how best to do this. One is that you put part breast milk in each bottle. You might be more likely to maintain the supply if you pump at a regular time as your body will respond to the infant's demands. Remember that after two weeks the supply is produced by demand. If you can pump at night, around 3am, while you get your supply established, your prolactin levels are higher which can make the job easier. I hope things go better for you now.
Do you know about laser treatment for tongue tie? It might be something to explore if the cut hasn't been successful.

Cross posted with Merrow.
It will always give you a better chance of success if you pump more frequently but if you find three to four sessions a day is all you can cope with you could start there. You can always increase or decrease the frequency gradually as you go along. Some people are lucky and their breasts are very responsive. Even a small amount of breast milk will benefit your baby so whatever you are able to do will help.

Sorry you’re in this situation, I could have written your exact post 6 months ago, it’s so tough 💐

I ended up exclusively formula feeding from day 10 as I just couldn’t cope with the expressing and trying to get baby to feed at the breast constantly - it became really stressful and traumatic for us both. I did regret it though, and spent a long time beating myself up about it. So I can’t help with the breastfeeding part but I just wanted you to know you’re not alone and whatever you chose to do will be the best choice for you and your baby ❤

Thanks everyone for the responses. You can probably see from the efforts and specialists I took in the first 3 days that I really did want this to work.

That's interesting re the supply not being enough.

My poor DP (who is so so supportive) is hoping I'll just stick with formula (only because he doesn't want me in pain and crying again). I don't know what's the the best

"So is this plausible? Baby has say 8 bottles a day, and 4 are formula and 4 are expressed breast milk?"

I did this from two months, EBF before that. I'm not sure if this could work from first weeks. But I had people insisting my milk would dry up, bub would prefer bottle and refuse breast, only one way is the right way etc. etc. My LO has only just stopped having once-a-day BF at two and a half. I rekon if you feel like you can face four pumping sessions a day then give it a shot. Your supply might dry up, but it might work out. Once I was doing half-half feeds I heard from alot more mums who were doing the same. Breastfeeding is crazy political and, yes, it's beautiful, but if it's depleting you so much you're not as present for your little one I don't believe it's worth it.
Be gentle with yourself, love your little one, and go well.

I don't want to push breastfeeding if you've decided to stop, but did you try nipple shields? My DS couldn't latch because of low muscle tone, and they enabled me to actually breastfeed. In theory they're not good for milk transfer but we were using them in NICU and the nurses were happy with the amount DS was getting, and he's put on weight with them.

There’s nothing wrong with giving it a go.
If you want to be sure about your supply it’s best to take more off but if you’re wanting to supplement formula feeding with breast milk, which is a perfectly reasonable thing to do, then just take off what you want. If your milk dries up then you’ll have to switch purely to formula, but if that’s what you’re thinking of trying anyway why not give breast milk supplement a go.

Hi OP. Yes it hits hard when you assume you'll be breastfeeding with ease and it just doesn't work for whatever reason. I had similar with DS1. I ended up mixed feeding by expressing and using formula. Managed it for a few months and then switched to just formula. He's now 8 and all fab so worked for us. The most important thing is that you and the baby are relaxed and happy.

Big unmumsnetty hug .

It is VERY early days. I 100% relate. I struggled immensely with all 3 of mine and tormented myself both mentally and physically by prolonging expressing and continuing to try even when I was mentally bashed from it all. I used to set alarms in the night just to go and express. For me I wanted the bond, I wanted to give them the best and I also felt like I "should" be breastfeeding.

With all 3 I mix fed. All 3 had tongue tie, only 1 was cut. With my first I 70% breastfed and topped up with formula and switched to ff at 6mo. With my second I 50% breastfed and topped up with formula until she was 3mo and then ff. With my third I 20% breastfed and topped up with formula until she was 1. I expressed to varying degrees with all 3 of them. There is no right or wrong way to do it, you decide what works for you and your baby. When I gave expressed milk it was always neat and not mixed with formula, but you could do that if you wanted. I used to save it up until I got a full bottle as sometimes I'd only get 30ml.

There are things you can do to increase supply if you want to. You can make lactation cookies, drink fennel tea and express before and after breastfeeding. There's also something called switch feeding (I think) where you move from one to the other and back again (if I recall correctly) which is supposed to help supply.

Ultimately, whatever you do, baby will adapt to. My biggest takeaway from my own experience, is don't try to be perfect, don't do what you think you "should" be doing and don't push yourself if you feel like a failure. Acceptance can be hard but it's very very rewarding and will enable you to move forwards in your journey. Give yourself full permission to not be perfect, because no matter what you do, your baby will only see you as perfect. Hindsight is a wonderful thing. Personally I wish I hadn't put myself through it all in equal measure as being glad I did, but I wish I hadn't been so hard on myself and I wish I'd given myself permission to stop sooner.