My husband has never cleared out a drawer/his wardrobe/the cellar/the loft/anything in the house without me asking him to ...

[LindorDoubleChoc]

We have been married nearly 29 years and today I am fed up about this. I went to look for a tool in the tool box and it is filthy, filled with broken things and junk, random bits that I (and I bet he) has no idea what they are for.

The tool box is at least 20 years old and is broken. I have ordered a new one which will be his anniversary present.

I am not good at being tidy or decluttering or housekeeping and I do 95% of the house and 90% of the gardening and it just fucks me off!

He works about 50 hours a week and I work 16 or 22 (alternate weeks) so, yes, overall the balance of work is probably about fair. But boy is this pissing me off! Why can't he just be wholly in charge of one thing and keep on top of it?

Why is it his responsibility to tidy up the toolbox? My DH decides if his drawers or wardrobe needs sorting out,
muse sis be of your 28 free hours that he doesn’t have to sort it out!

No idea but mine is the same. To be fair I’ve given up being polite about it and every few months I’ll give him a rubbish bag and send him off to throw some crap out of his “spaces”. In theory I could just never look or whatever but the clutter drives me mad and it doesn’t occur to him. But he will do it without arguing about it so fair enough.

You can't honestly spend 34 hours or 28 hours (alternate weeks) decluttering, housekeeping and gardening, surely? DH is pulling his weight earning money! You have to spend your time doing something useful.

No, of course not. I'm doing all the usual housework, laundry, shopping and cooking, sitting for hours on calls to insurance/utilities/phone companies and all the usual wife work. We have a very large garden so maintenance of that is not a small matter.

I just think ffs just be in charge of this one tiny thing, will you PLEASE.

A lot of people are of the mindset unless it’s a problem leave it