Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

My mum abused me

6 replies

cookingmama02 · 05/04/2023 17:26

Growing up I was one of 3, I was the middle child, my mum ( biological grandma ) used to always physically hit me, rag my hair, smack me etc but never my brother or sister. I don't know why she just chose me. I remember things she's said such as telling me I should have died when I was recovering in hospital at 8 years old after being hit by a car, telling me to jump in the pond and drown myself when we was at a park and much more things. Growing up age 9/10 I was SA and I told a family member whilst I was at there house and they phoned my mum and took me home. When I got there the abuser had being invited to my house and my mum was screaming at me calling me a liar and to get out of her house whilst he was stood smirking at me, ever since I can remember growing up she would call me (Sl4g, wh0re etc ) when I was just a kid. She found out I was self harming at 11 and beat me up because of it. The list goes on but this just sums up a few things of what she's like she doesn't do it anymore because I'm now 19 but I wrote this today because I got a new job and told her she said " why the f*ck would you get a job you won't stick to it anyway" but my brother and sister got a great amount of praise when they got there job, she's never proud of me and I'm the least favourite why does she hate me? What could I have ever done to her. They all pretend like none of it ever happened ( mum, sister, brother ) they call me delusional and say it's all in my head and I've made it up.

OP posts:
cookingmama02 · 05/04/2023 17:31

also when I had my first daughter I still lived with her, she told me I will bring my daughter up how she says, if I'm living under her roof. my daughter was a few days old and hungry she told me I'm not allowed to feed her because she will get fat and ugly ( I obviously fed her anyway ) and then when my daughter was around 2 we visited her and I saw her out of the corner of my eye gritting and showing her teeth to my daughter and widening her eyes in an aggressive way for no reason. She would never do this to any other kids in the family so why mine? just like she only chose to do these things to me as a kid. Should I cut her off.

OP posts:
Daisychainsandglitter · 05/04/2023 17:38

This is shocking to read. What an awful person your grandmother was.
Is my understanding that you are only 19?
I sincerely hope you managed to get away from her and are no longer living with her.
To carry on this behaviour to your DD too.
Just awful and for the rest of your family for enabling her.
Please cut them off you can do so much better. I hope you are ok now. You are such a strong person to have put up with that cruel behaviour.

cookingmama02 · 05/04/2023 17:48

Daisychainsandglitter · 05/04/2023 17:38

This is shocking to read. What an awful person your grandmother was.
Is my understanding that you are only 19?
I sincerely hope you managed to get away from her and are no longer living with her.
To carry on this behaviour to your DD too.
Just awful and for the rest of your family for enabling her.
Please cut them off you can do so much better. I hope you are ok now. You are such a strong person to have put up with that cruel behaviour.

Hi, yes I'm 19 I have 2 kids now I moved to Scotland with my kids dad when my girl was a few weeks old she's 3 now. I have only visited my mum a few times its usually contact via phone as I keep making excuses not to visit and I know they won't come here as they expect me to go to them always. I've tried to cut her off before but the whole extended family say she would never do these things and get very angry with me so if I stop talking to her I loose my whole family.

OP posts:
Blort · 05/04/2023 17:49

I am so sorry. The horrible irony is because you were denied love and safety as a child it will cause you to seek it even more from your mother.

You deserve nothing less than to never see her again. You should speak to the GP and ask if you can get a referral for therapy. Beginning to heal these wounds will be the best thing you can do for your daughter.

Flowers
Daisychainsandglitter · 05/04/2023 18:36

Well done for getting away. You are so strong. Your wider family enable her behaviour. I would cut them all off and focus on building a new life for yourself and your young family. Flowers

SamMil · 05/04/2023 18:49

I know it is hard but I would cut off all contact. If the rest of the family judge you for that then you are better off without them in your life too.

You won't lose your whole family, as you have your own family now and they are the ones that matter. Your children do not deserve the same awful behaviour directed at them and you didn't deserve it either.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page