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Original poster

Anyone flying this Week?

41 replies

MissChief001 · 04/04/2023 19:47

I’m someone who is very scared of flying…I’ve worked hard at managing this (and my anxiety) and booked a trip to Madrid, flying on Thursady. I’ve worked hard over the weeks to not cancel the trip etc…but as the days draw closer my ‘anxiety panicky’ voice is gaining traction. I’ve tried to quieten it down today by going for a walk but with all the strike action etc I feel ( by that I mean my anxious brain) something will horribly go wrong :-(

Anyone flying anywhere this week? If flying doesn’t bother you as much could you be kind enough to share how you go about the days in a positive mindset?

OP posts:
maddy68 · 04/04/2023 19:57

My dh used to worry. He got some Valium from the doctors. Did the trick!

I fly very regularly. I just don't think about it. It's like catching a train
Be on time don't have liquids without them being the right size

Make the airport part of the holiday. Go for a meal there

Original poster
MissChief001 · 04/04/2023 20:07

Thank you @maddy68 - the gp mentioned that Valium is not prescribed for fear of flying any longer. She prescribed Setraline but mentioned that it’ll take 3 weeks to kick in and I might feel worse in the interim. I haven’t started taking this as fearful of the ‘feeling worse’ part close to the trip.

OP posts:
Silkierabbit · 04/04/2023 20:19

I flew last week so pre strikes. I love flying find it really exciting, love seeing over places and seeing the clouds, have a meal and /or drinks on board to break up time. Statistically it's far safer than being in a car and you don't worry about car journeys each day. I was also told when aircraft problems it's normally first 60 seconds so can count to 60 then be fine though I don't do that anymore. I just think it's amazing to be able to travel like this and had I lived 100 years ago would not have had this opportunity. I would not bother with sertraline, you will just get side effects if going on Thursday and a bad stomach and flying isn't greatest combination. Yawning helps ears on descent. Hope you have a lovely trip.

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Flying Holidays
ohxmastreeohxmastree · 04/04/2023 20:24

Been away since Saturday for a few nights, flew back today. We were delayed by about 2 hours on the way out on Saturday and DP gets a bit cagey in situations like that so we went and bought ourselves something nice in the airport - by nice I mean splashing out on a £6 magazine or a £15 lip balm. Just something to feel nice about and pass the time by browsing! I always think when I get delayed on the way out that ultimately if everything went wrong I would just go home and it would all be okay.

No problems on the way back. Madr

ohxmastreeohxmastree · 04/04/2023 20:25

Posted too soon!

Madrid is my most favourite place on the planet, so much so that we lived there for a period of time. You will have the most amazing time OP, treat yourself to a little something in the airport as I say to pass the time and distract you. If it helps I always find Madrid airport an extremely smooth experience. You’ve got this!

Original poster
MissChief001 · 04/04/2023 20:44

Thank you @Silkierabbit and @ohxmastreeohxmastree for being kind. This awful condition doesn’t let me think of the destination and the amazing things to explore- all it does is list out all the dreadful things that can happen - it’s mentally draining. I’m trying my best to hold myself together.

ill look around the shops to distract myself.

OP posts:
Cakemonger · 04/04/2023 20:50

I'm not very scared of flying, just a bit nervous, but what calms me down is looking at the flight attendants and how casual/calm/bored they look as it's just a normal work day for them. I think, if they're not worried I'm not worried!

Original poster
MissChief001 · 04/04/2023 20:51

@Cakemonger yes I thought of this- what’s an absolute mountain for me is another boring day at work for them -

OP posts:
Perfectlystill · 04/04/2023 20:54

I don't like flying but the best tip I ever had is to tell the flight crew you're scared of flying and ask them to be nice to you.

I always tell them now and they are always lovely, warning me if any turbulence is expected and asking how I am. It makes all the difference.

I also take diazepam and have a drink or two.

Enjoy your holiday!

Original poster
MissChief001 · 04/04/2023 21:03

@Perfectlystill thank you. I’m flying with Iberia , not sure given the duration of the flight they would have the capacity to support someone like me.

OP posts:
Winewednesday · 04/04/2023 21:04

If you can, read SOAR or at least the first half, it helped me with my fear of flying and I am so much calmer. It gives you coping strategies to use.

Topseyt123 · 04/04/2023 21:05

I flew back from Malaga last Friday after a fortnight's holiday.

I'm a nervous flyer. I don't really like it at all but I do like going to some of the places that it can conveniently get me to, which I otherwise wouldn't see or experience at all. So I try hard to remind myself of that and to frame the flight in my mind as an inconvenience that I just have to go through in order to get there.

I find browsing the shops and coffee bars at the airport is a good distraction. Once on the plane, and with take-off out of the way (take-off and landing being my least favourite parts of the flight) I find a stiff gin and tonic helps, whatever the time of day. A flight is one of the very rare occasions when I might have a drink before evening.

Missingpate · 04/04/2023 21:15

Reading with interest as I am flying soon and haven’t for some years. Will be ds’s first flight so I really don’t want to make him feel any worry because I’m worried. Luckily I think he’ll be mostly excited and I will pretend!

Nottodaysausage · 04/04/2023 21:20

A funny podcast, like parenting hell or my therapist ghosted me, a double gin and tonic, and some thing small that you find comforting - I some times carry a crystal or a lipstick my mum has bought me if I'm feeling a bit anxious.

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 04/04/2023 21:20

MissChief001 · 04/04/2023 20:07

Thank you @maddy68 - the gp mentioned that Valium is not prescribed for fear of flying any longer. She prescribed Setraline but mentioned that it’ll take 3 weeks to kick in and I might feel worse in the interim. I haven’t started taking this as fearful of the ‘feeling worse’ part close to the trip.

I just don't get this . Why prescribe you something which needs to be taken for 3 weeks to get into your system - and then probably needs weaning off when diazepam works instantly . Thank goodness my GP still prescribes it. Have read so many people in here saying that theirs doesn't though ... I have started to request a prescription earlier then I need to in case I find this ruling eventually finds it's way to my GP.

Dressshelp · 04/04/2023 21:30

I hate flying - I literally tried to get a container ship home from Fiji rather than fly back (not my finest hour!)

I’ve spent a lot of time since then coming up with strategies as we fly a lot these days and I don’t want to miss out on holidays.

I find Allan carrs fear of flying book really good, and I have also had hypnotism but I didn’t think that helped very well. You can do fear of flying courses on line through British airways as well and a pilot talks you through all the noises etc.

I have had help from the doctors in the past, but weirdly I now find taking 2 Nytol makes me feel the calmest.

oh! Also, I quite like getting a flight later in the day knowing the crew and plane have usually flown in from somewhere else and are literally half way through their shift and everything’s been tested. They are literally counting down to getting home and thinking about what they are having for supper - try and focus on how what’s a big deal for you is literally just another shift at work for them.

Kensukesfifedom · 04/04/2023 21:38

Years ago I got Lexotan for fear of flying. Worked brilliantly but I only used it once. I'm better since.

I block my ears for take off. I watch a movie on my tablet or listen to music. Taking the deepest breath you can manage and releasing it over a count of 8 helps. Watching Flight Radar and realising that so many flights will have taken off and landed between now and your flight safely.
Watch the crew and realise this is their office! Realise too that the pilot is highly trained and they would not jeopardise their vehicle. Everything involved is IN FAVOUR of you getting to your destination on time and safely. Yours odds of having a smooth flight are high. Your odds of having a good experience are also high.

Bon voyage!

Original poster
MissChief001 · 05/04/2023 02:49

Thank you all for the responses/ I went to bed early as felt ‘off’ now woken up due to a full blown panic attack. it took me 45 mins to calm myself down - I’ve not had a panic attack for more than a year, I feel such a failure :-( every bone in my body is saying I should cancel the trip but I’m trying to think of all the podcasts etc I listened to about flying and think of the facts. I wanted to speak to someone so using this forum almost to vent…

OP posts:
Original poster
MissChief001 · 05/04/2023 03:00

@ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea i don’t know-it was a telephone consultation and she said that’s the best option

OP posts:
JennyWren87 · 05/04/2023 04:26

I'm flying this evening with my one and two year old toddlers. Pray for me!

SeatonCarew · 05/04/2023 04:53

Hi OP.

I don't mind flying but I can find airports a bit stressful when it's busy. Something I heard that really helps me is that feeling nervous is very similar to feeling excited, so now I work on the basis I am excited and looking forward to my trip. Weirdly it works for me!

Just think that if you can get over this, you will really expand the possibilities for fun for a future you. Perhaps a fear of flying course would help you at some point? Knowing the routines of the crew, what all the different noises mean etc can help to demystify the experience.

Allow yourself plenty of time for travelling to the airport and check your luggage is the permitted size etc then take things steadily, one step at a time. I tell myself, " Right, I'll check my case in" (if applicable). When I've done that I'll think, "Good, that's done. Now I'll go through security", and quickly remind myself of what I need to do there, and so on.

Good luck with it all and I hope you have a wonderful trip. 💐

squashyhat · 05/04/2023 04:54

I'm doing a short hop to Luxembourg next week. It's the first city break DH and I have done together for a while so we are really looking forward to it. I find getting to the airport in plenty of time helps my (admittedly mild now - I used to to be a lot worse) anxiety, giving myself permission to have a glass of wine whatever time of day it is, and making sure I go to the loo at the last minute before boarding keeps me calm. Also remember how routine it all is for the crew - they are fully expecting to finish their shift and go home without any drama. Have a lovely trip!

mnisannoyingAF · 05/04/2023 06:42

Gaaaaa when people say it's statistically safer than cars like it's not the first thing everyone says to us and like we didn't know that already. I'm the same as you but mine doesn't kick in until on the plane. CBD sweets help, have one when when you go to the gate. Don't drink, makes me worse. If you think about bumps imagine it's a pothole or bump in road, you always come back down to it safely just like the plane comes back to the same position after a turbulence bump.

Getabloominmoveon · 05/04/2023 06:46

MissChief001 I fly almost every week to the European country where I work. Sometimes 2 countries. So it’s just like getting on a bus now for me.

In the 100s of flights I’ve done, absolutely nothing interesting has happened, except occasionally arriving late.

You know statistically how safe it is, and the fact that traveling to the airport is more dangerous. So have a glass of wine, put your headphones on , watch a film, and before you know it you’ll be landing.

Have a lovely time in Madrid!

Gufo · 05/04/2023 06:54

MissChief001 · 04/04/2023 20:07

Thank you @maddy68 - the gp mentioned that Valium is not prescribed for fear of flying any longer. She prescribed Setraline but mentioned that it’ll take 3 weeks to kick in and I might feel worse in the interim. I haven’t started taking this as fearful of the ‘feeling worse’ part close to the trip.

Not RTFT but it is - I collected my valium for flying a couple of weeks ago!