I hope I don't regret posting this but here goes.
On paper I have a lovely life. Wonderful dh and dc, nice home, a good job, enough money to do nice things, but I'm suddenly feeling very lonely.
I went from being shy but popular at school and college to eventually having no friends at all. I suspect I'm just not very likeable, almost every friend I've ever had has ghosted me. The only ones who stayed interested were users and toxic drama llamas. I've made a few friends at work over the years but it always ends up fizzling out until I'm ghosted. I'm not pushy or overbearing so I suspect I'm just boring and unlikeable. I think that I may have autism (that's another thread) but I struggle with anxiety and social situations, noise, sensory stuff, so friendships are difficult anyway and so are group situations. One lovely friend I had made through work really changed after the pandemic and stopped wanting to do anything. We had been friends for years and are still in touch but she's like a different person.
I usually stand alone in the school playground. It's not that I don't get on with the other mums, but I just can't make those connections. Small talk at a party is all I can manage. I see people standing in groups laughing and chatting and it's as if they are a different species.
Pretty sure what's started me off is too much social media and seeing people doing lovely things with friends and it's one part of my life that's seriously lacking.