How do you cope with 2 kids?!

[Pootlie]

DD is good friends with our next door neighbour kid and she comes to play after school most days. I cannot cope with the dynamic though, constant arguing and competing over who gets which bowl, cup, who got the largest food portion etc etc. I've often suggested they don't play together but both children are onlies and they do want to be together and they can play nicely at times.

They are both 6.

How do I adjudicate? It has to be fair because they always play at ours so I can't make DD give way every time.

I have a 6 year old and usually find it's easier when he has friends round as they occupy each other. They never argue. Is it both of them starting the fights?

I feel like at 6 you can tell them this bickering is not on and you get what you’re given. I often have a house with 5 kids 7 and under (play date for my older 2 kids plus the baby) and we don’t experience any of that.

Also it’s starting from an unfair playing field if you’re always hosting.

Or just stop the play dates til they can cope?

I have the same issues! My DS is 8 and when his friend comes over it feels like I'm a referee. Always bickering over what to play, what to watch. Drives me mad but I just reinforce that they need to take turns and be nice otherwise the opportunity won't come up again for a while.

Constant competing? Hmmm. I had two, so can't tell you if it's an only child thing, but at 6 yrs both of mine were pretty settled with friends. I'm wondering... are you sure they actually like each other? It might seem a good idea to mix onlies, but maybe they're just not, y'know, mates?
Sorry. Not v helpful.

Also I just picked up that she comes round to play after school MOST DAYS?? What is in this for you? Does your DD enjoy overall? You’re either mad or a saint 😄

Tricky because they seek each other out most days. My DD has perfectly nice peaceful play dates with other kids but this girl is more like a sibling I guess. Maybe I need to just take a super tough line on bickering and send other one home every time it starts.

I actually think they do like each other but have completely incompatible play styles.