My mum has a long term illness and was managing until about 2 months ago when she had a sudden decline and ended up collapsing at home with pneumonia, sepsis and progression of her long term illness. She is mid 60s but now in a nursing home with massively reduced mobility, she's still really unwell as her illness has progressed too far now for anything to be done, she's not on palliative care but she will continue to decline now and all that can be done is trying to her symptoms as much as possible to limit her pain and discomfort. She is in the worst place mentally I have ever seen someone.
We have a bit of a complicated relationship due to many reasons but I have put it all aside and all there is now is that I love her so much and my heart breaks to see her suffer like this. She cannot leave the nursing home because she can't get in and out of a car or walk more that the distance from an en suite to the chair. It's her birthday in two weeks and I just don't know what to do. I feel like I can't buy a "happy birthday" card because nothing about it is happy. She's also 2.5 hours away. Any advice please? Struggling here tbh.