11 year old rules

[HaggisFace]

Hello,

DD11 almost 12 has expressed dissatisfaction with our rules so we are looking at how to find some common ground.

We don't allow unrestricted phone time and phone is to be left downstairs at night. Lights off at 9.30pm Sun-Thurs and 10pm Fri and Sat.

She does a sport 13 hours per week and when she doesn't get enough sleep it's very obvious as her attitude and behaviour deteriorates however, I know she's getting older and don't want to be overly strict.

What are your phone and bed time rules?

Dts 11 are in y7. They have to do any homework as soon as they get home then they can have their phones until dinner around 730. They go up around 830 to read and lights off by 930. At the weekend still no phones after dinner and they can go to bed when they like within reason, they are usually asleep by 10

11 here. Bed time is officially 830pm school nights and usually strings it out to 9 on a weekend. Couple of nights it's later due to activities.

Phone is locked at 7pm - 630am apart from allowed contacts and music. No games or Netflix on phone and allowed websites only. No social media/WhatsApp.

30 minutes game time on iPad allowed during the week, up to 2 hours at weekends (grade dependent). iPad is passcodes so DH or I have to unlock it.

She does take her phone to her bedroom to listen to music/alarm. Currently only has her best friend's number on her phone as she doesn't want to give it out to the rest of the class 🤷‍♀️ bit surprised, but I won't argue with her on that! If messaging g becomes an issue, we'll change that.

My yr8 goes up at 8.45 so that there is a fighting chance she is in bed by 9:30. She gets 2.5 hours on her phone no snapchat, tiktok or facebook phone locks at 7pm. All devices are downstairs overnight.

I give no shits what 'all her friends' have I am not parenting them. When she doesn't do the things she is asked to do or gets chippy with me the phone goes off. It is not an essential bit of kit for a child.

Y7 here. Phone locks 7.30pm to 7.30am

Allowed WhatsApp but no other social media.

Thinks we're soooo strict but I don't think we are. She'd be glued to it all evening if we weren't. I'm 45 and I can't get off my phone so there'd be no hope for her.

DD is 16. No phones overnight, or any electronics (including TV) allowed in her room.

Bed time generally 9.30 now but aged 12 she was in bed lights off at 8.30pm even at weekends.

No tiktok or snapchat allowed.

According to her, all her friemds are allowed ohones overnight and any SM they want. Since she reached about 14 shes understood our reasons for "strict" rules and doesnt complain about them.

Stick to your guns. Just tell her that other peoples kids arent your concern and you are doing what you think is best for her. End of story.