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Original poster

A question about au pairs

47 replies

LindorDoubleChoc · 27/03/2023 06:34

I saw a request worded like this on a local FB group:

Looking for English lessons for my Italian au pair. Interested in evening or weekend lessons! Could be in a group, one to one or online. Thanks.

What is your immediate reaction to that?

OP posts:

Hayliebells · 27/03/2023 07:34

Ok, but 30 hours a week is still only 6 a day, it’s shorter than a working day. They should still have time so they don’t need to do classes in the week. Even if they ad said they’re available every morning between 9.30am and 12pm, or all day Friday, it would be far less suspicious.

Hayliebells · 27/03/2023 07:34

Sorry that should have read they don’t need to do classes in the evening and weekend.

PicaK · 27/03/2023 07:58

So what did you think was wrong with it? Is it the exclamation mark? Do you think it's a novel way to market prostitution? Curious.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Childcare & nursery Families

Porridgeislife · 27/03/2023 09:01

A rubbish au pair family won’t be facilitating language lessons at all.

I don’t really see the problem in evening or weekend classes. Many au pairs don’t know people and she/he may want it that way to help meet people/fill free time.

AnnaBegins · 27/03/2023 09:04

Our au pair does 3 days a week wraparound care, so would have daytimes free yes, but, so do all her au pair friends! Maybe this au pair, like ours, prefers to go out on adventures during the week and would like a short weekend lesson. (In our case she goes to English lessons on a Thurs daytime with her friend, but that's not mandatory!)

Houseyvibe · 27/03/2023 09:05

it raises absolutely no red flags whatsoever. The aupair may want to go to classes on the weekends or evening.

Maybe they find the weekends or evenings lonely and want to get out and meet people where they might then socialise after. It doesn't mean that they're being worked too hard during the day, just they prefer to do something else with free time during the day.

Think about it, if you're new to a country, don't know anyone and have evenings and weekends stretching ahead of you with nothing to do and nobody to do it with surely you might want to have something planned for a weekend with other people.

TheTeenageYears · 27/03/2023 09:09

Traditionally an au pair would come to learn English and help look after a family's child or children. Doesn't seem to be anything wrong with an advert of that nature.

SmallAngryPenguinWoman · 27/03/2023 09:24

PicaK · 27/03/2023 07:58

So what did you think was wrong with it? Is it the exclamation mark? Do you think it's a novel way to market prostitution? Curious.

Well there's a leap 🐸😆

MrNook · 27/03/2023 09:26

What's the problem?

Original poster

LindorDoubleChoc · 27/03/2023 09:52

Yes. Au pairs are not meant to work full time. They should have free hours Mon-Fri to attend language lessons. That is the whole point of au pairing. However, I guess this particular au pair could have other things she does in her free time which means she'd prefer evening or weekend lessons. Just did look suss to me.

OP posts:

BouncingWorms · 27/03/2023 09:59

Maybe the au pair has plenty of free time in the week but doesn’t drive and needs the working parent to take her unless the lessons are very convenient?

BouncingWorms · 27/03/2023 10:01

Or maybe the she has different weekdays off each week because the family are shift workers so evenings or weekends would work better.

mindutopia · 27/03/2023 10:06

I interpreted ‘evening’ to mean after dinner time, so like 7/8pm. I would assume that an au pair is doing mostly before/after school hours. Hence looking for language lessons once the parents are home to take over (and possibly to drive the au pair there). It’s possible he/she does other things during the day.

Cherrysoup · 27/03/2023 10:35

Surely part of the idea of having a non-English speaking au pair is that they’re here to improve their English? I thought that was part of the experience for them? Some families pay for them to improve. From my own experience, I learnt the language super quickly purely from being with the children 7/7.

Original poster

LindorDoubleChoc · 27/03/2023 10:42

If the employers are doing au pairing correctly, the ap only works part time and has time to do English lessons during the working week.

OP posts:

mynameiscalypso · 27/03/2023 10:47

LindorDoubleChoc · 27/03/2023 10:42

If the employers are doing au pairing correctly, the ap only works part time and has time to do English lessons during the working week.

But maybe she doesn't want to?

jay55 · 27/03/2023 10:52

The au pair might like to use the gym while it's quiet in the daytime, or sightsee or something else.

Or the parents want some guaranteed time that the au pair isn't around while they are off.

JustFrustrated · 27/03/2023 10:55

As an ex host mother.

All my au pairs preferred classes of an evening.

Reasons:

I/DH were there to drive them if the weather was crap.

It broke their week up.

It segued nicely into going to a pub after.

They liked going back to bed for a nap after doing the school run.

The day time classes left too little time to get to the school for the kids.

So yes, they had 845 until 245 free every day (and then from 5pm) but actually, like most people with children they were held to local areas for collecting the kids on time.

Not everything is suss. You just made a leap.

Fenellapitstop · 27/03/2023 11:01

I have an aupair, I work shifts and am a single parent. My aupair doesn't work 30hrs a week. She refuses any English lessons. She does however go to the gym. Generally aupairs that have stayed with me have a better social life than I do!

underneaththeash · 27/03/2023 11:27

All mine would have done cafe work in the afternoons.

TheWayTheLightFalls · 27/03/2023 11:39

From talking to friends with live-in au pairs my immediate reaction is that the au pair is getting on the hosts' nerves by never leaving the bloody house, so the host is "helpfully" trying to arrange something for him/her.

mycoffeecup · 27/03/2023 11:45

Lots of au pairs will take on a job in a shop/bar in the school day when they aren't needed for au-pairing

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