How many of your teens (age 16) have travelled abroad on their own

[iwantavuvezela]

Teen is pushing to go away with friends for a week in summer to Europe beach type place - age 16. I have said no, and teen has said that "everyone does this at the end of Y11". I am happy to go with more independence and freedom(s). However it's the staying in a hostel (are they even allowed to do this) going out at night, young girls ..... seems a rush towards independence - would love some views on this

I can definitely see this happening in a year (age 17 and onwards) when teen also has a bit more life experience under her belt.

She's not wrong. It seems to be a thing. Many went away with friends after GCSE exams. I caved when realising that. Mine has a great friendship group, they had the best time and all was completely fine.
I would say it depends on your child and who they are going with.

Mine went at 17, they had friends who were 18 so could book the rooms.

Post GCSE celebrations at 16 were festivals within the UK for both of them.

Ours did Reading after GCSEs.

They also were lucky enough to have a friend with a family home abroad, so 4 of them went there (France) BUT the friend's VERY scary Grandmere was in residence and felt that they should spend their time reading improving books and learning how to chop onions rather than heading out to the bars.

Where did they stay?

Mine went to Spain with friends at 16. It didn't bother me too much. One of the girls knew the resort they were going to and it was very much a family friendly sort of place, not club 18 - 30 type place. They were about 6 or 7 girls, stayed together as far as I know, and had a nice time.

We haven't even been abroad as a family let alone DS going alone.

Could you persuade them to do Reading/Leeds Festival instead? Not much better, but at least it's in the UK!

Ds went aboard with a friend at 16, but it was to stay with another school friend (who'd recently returned to his home country) and his family who I knew were lovely. Even then I was quite worried about him catching flights etc. I don't think I'd be happy with an unsupervised holiday aboard at that age, not unless there are some adults going to be nearby and in call. A lot of dangers with alcohol, other people and naïve teens, which could be very risky with no adult able to be called for help if needed. Eg if one of them is ill, injured, assaulted, arrested, blind drunk, robbed, etc. Most hostels won't take unaccompanied under 18s and Airbnb won't either. I'd encourage a holiday in the UK instead - youth hostels or campsites may take them.

Going abroad is NOT a thing for 16 year olds. Post A level certainly, but 16 years cannot get accommodation.

@Girliefriendlikespuppies you summed up my thoughts - everything is okay until it goes wrong - shew I needed to read these responses today -thank you all for sharing your thoughts.

I suggested the festival's, but Dd had said she would like to wait a year so to go to those!

DD went camping with another 16 year old and two 17 year olds. They had to contact a lot of campsites before they could find one that would take under 18s.

She went to Lanzarote with a group of friends straight after A levels (she was still 17 as she has a July birthday). All the others were 18.

I agree with you, OP, give it another year or so. My DD is going on a group trip this summer just after her 18th, the first one without parents involved at all.

Everyone else has already turned 18 and it’s so much easier. No parental permission needed, they’ve booked their accommodation, etc.

I'm at the lax end of the things-I-will-allow-my-teenagers-to-do scale, and I also grew up between two countries, so was a seasoned traveller by the age of 12 when you used to age out of being an unaccompanied minor. Some of that does now make my hair curl, with hindsight - at 13 I was getting the train from boarding school to London, crossing London on the tube, getting the boat train from London Victoria to Dover, ferry from Dover to Oostende, and train from Oostende to Vienna. In the days before mobile phones and the Euro, so if anything had gone wrong I could have been stuck in a country where I didn't speak the language and didn't have any local currency. I do wonder what my parents were thinking, but I guess the 1980s were a different time etc etc...😱

My dc have travelled abroad by themselves from younger than 16, but it was to visit family or friends, with somebody dropping them and picking them up the other end. I would be fine with a 16yo (and probably younger tbh) going to eg. Paris or Brussels by Eurostar with one sensible friend to stay with a known person at the other end, or ditto flying somewhere they would be met by people they know.

BUT IMO 16 is too young to go on an open-ended, beach-type holiday abroad with a group of random friends of indeterminate sensibleness, quite aside from the fact that most hotels and rental places won't accept unaccompanied under-18s. Teenagers do silly stuff, teenagers in groups with access to alcohol do even sillier stuff, and there's potential for this to go horribly wrong in a different jurisdiction where you can't necessarily go and rescue them. I'd be inclined to tell them to try this kind of holiday in the UK and see how it goes, and then review the situation next summer.

I was popped on a plane to Moscow, aged 14, to be met by my Russian exchange (whom we had met) and parents (whom we had not) and had a fab time. The plane was delayed so I checked myself out of the kids lounge, rang my exchange etc. my DM does now say she wonders what she was playing at! Times have changed and I think I would fret about a bunch of U18s abroad alone.