Please your stories of turning your life around

[Fantina]

Life has been very hard for the past few years. I’m single, in a lot of debt, with a good professional job but I’m stagnating in it. I’m very overweight and my ex does his best to continue to perpetuate post-separation abuse.

However I have two wonderful DCs, we have a roof over our heads in a nice area and we have lots of wonderful friends who love us.

I’ve decided I need to be the one to make the changes needed in my life so that in 2-5 years I can look back on now and realise how far I’ve come. So, please inspire me with your stories of transforming you lives!

I also would like to hear some positive stories x

I'm in a similar situation. I don't have any positive story yet but am hopeful I will have in time to come!

Seven years ago I was seriously depressed, no self esteem, eating disorder, drinking problem, toxic friendships. It was due at least in part to childhood abuse I suppose, but when I was in that place I felt so lost and hopeless. I kept on pushing and pushing to 'get better' but I couldn't see the bigger picture if that makes sense. No matter what I achieved, I couldn't seem to get anywhere or feel any better about myself. I'd see people around me living and enjoying their lives, and I couldn't understand why I couldn't seem to do that.

I can honestly say I have started to transform my life, from the inside out. I say 'started to' because it will be a lifetime's work - I never want to stop learning and growing.
I broke contact with my abusive mother, since she made me feel worthless every time I saw her.
I stopped drinking and started going to AA meetings
My eating has improved (but it's probably always going to be a work in progress)
I've cut out bad relationships where possible, and distance myself from others. I protect myself today from people who make me feel shit.
I have made some amazing friends who I love. We just enjoy our time together.
I exercise and it makes my life better
I am a good mother to my children.
I am reasonably secure financially.
Most importantly, I have made peace with my past and I no longer judge myself for being me!

I really do wish you all the best OP 🤍 it is possible to change your life.

Well done, @hadtoomuchsleep. What sparked the ability to change? It’s encouraging that you feel so much better than seven years ago.

16 years ago I was leaving an abusive drug addict. I was homeless and staying with friends, I had £23k of debt, I was only 21. Things briefly got better and then I ended up in another abusive relationship. This one was worse, I fell pregnant. It took four years for me to find a way out of that relationship. Knee deep in debt and a single mother. I did have a good job though and I had a good roof over our heads.
I met a wonderful man and then had a fall and ended up in a wheelchair for 14 months. I set up a business during this time partially out of boredom, and partially because I came to the realisation I was going to struggle to work in a regular job ever again.
Now, I have a successful business, I'm not in a wheelchair anymore, I married the wonderful man, I have a lovely home and yes things are tough financially at the moment, but we have a great life as a family unit.
Things can change, do one thing at a time.