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I hate my life right now

10 replies

Lotsofbabies6 · 17/03/2023 20:25

Total pity party I know, but I'm feeling so depressed and I can't seem to shake the dark thoughts this time. Also, I know some people have it much worse, so please don't tell me that!

I have 6 children and live in a women's refuge. It's not the worst place in the world, but it's so restrictive, and it's not home. There are so few houses large enough for the council to put us in that we could be here for a while.

I came here to safeguard my children but ex has obviously punished me so I've had emails through solicitors asking for both reconciliation... And a divorce... He's applied to court for access to the kids so I've got all that to come which is making me so anxious, depressed and ill.

I don't get legal aid because I have some savings, but I needed those savings because I left everything behind so will need to buy it all again, and council houses don't even come with carpets so there's all that to get, too.

I'm getting an average of 4-5 hours of sleep a night. I barely have any me time. And I never have fun!

My main "enjoyment" is eating but I'm terrified of putting on weight as I have severe body dysmorphia disorder.

I have joined a gym but can't get to it that much and I'm not confident enough to go in the pool, sauna, steam room, the exercise classes or any gym equipment other than the three basic things I can use so it's a lot of money for not that much.

My 2 year old is up with me breastfeeding on and off until I go to bed and then she feeds through the night. She's started screaming at me in the car because I can't feed her.

I have no family support.

And I can't hide away forever... One day the non molestation order against my ex will expire, he'll get unsupervised contact with the two youngest children (his bio ones) and will be rubbing his hands with glee that he gets to have contact with me again and/or rub whoever he's seeing at the time in my face.

Just so tired of everything, and sometimes wish I didn't have to deal with it all...

OP posts:
Zampa · 17/03/2023 20:28

You are so strong. Life can seem bleak but I promise you, things will improve and you will look back and be grateful you made it through the dark times, protecting and caring for your children. Keep posting. We're here for you.

Lotsofbabies6 · 17/03/2023 20:30

Zampa · 17/03/2023 20:28

You are so strong. Life can seem bleak but I promise you, things will improve and you will look back and be grateful you made it through the dark times, protecting and caring for your children. Keep posting. We're here for you.

Thank you. I felt all this before but now I've gone down a slippery slope.

OP posts:
Zampa · 17/03/2023 20:36

I've been in dark places but I made it out the other side. I promise you there is one!

Exercise really helped my mental health tbh. I know it's easy to say but no one's looking at you at the gym or the pool (we're all self-absorbed!).

Bluebirds1987 · 17/03/2023 20:40

I have no advice but just wanted to send you a big virtual hug. Being the mum of young children is so incredibly hard in itself, it sounds like you have already gone through so much to get where you are now, you are much stronger than you think you are, even just to get here. Are there other people in the refuge you can chat to?
Xxx

Lotsofbabies6 · 17/03/2023 20:50

Zampa · 17/03/2023 20:36

I've been in dark places but I made it out the other side. I promise you there is one!

Exercise really helped my mental health tbh. I know it's easy to say but no one's looking at you at the gym or the pool (we're all self-absorbed!).

Thank you ❤️ so glad you made it through

OP posts:
Lotsofbabies6 · 17/03/2023 20:51

Bluebirds1987 · 17/03/2023 20:40

I have no advice but just wanted to send you a big virtual hug. Being the mum of young children is so incredibly hard in itself, it sounds like you have already gone through so much to get where you are now, you are much stronger than you think you are, even just to get here. Are there other people in the refuge you can chat to?
Xxx

Thank you.

Yes there are some great other mums and staff too actually x

OP posts:
Zampa · 17/03/2023 20:55

It's not weak to share your vulnerabilities and no-one will think badly of you. Do speak to people IRL if you can

Lotsofbabies6 · 17/03/2023 21:02

Zampa · 17/03/2023 20:55

It's not weak to share your vulnerabilities and no-one will think badly of you. Do speak to people IRL if you can

Thanks so much. I bought a second hand gel nail kit today (because taking six kids to the nail salon every two weeks is not fun 🤣) so I'm just trying that out

OP posts:
Zampa · 18/03/2023 15:25

Lotsofbabies6 · 17/03/2023 21:02

Thanks so much. I bought a second hand gel nail kit today (because taking six kids to the nail salon every two weeks is not fun 🤣) so I'm just trying that out

Do post pics! 😀

These are my nails ATM.

I hate my life right now
Lotsofbabies6 · 18/03/2023 20:36

Aww thank you, I will do! Yours look so detailed 😍

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