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Original poster

Commiseration thread for those who will miss the 30 free hours from 9 months

72 replies

DownInTheDumpster · 15/03/2023 09:10

Not putting on AIBU as I know I am- all still TBC with the details, childcare sector already v wobbly etc etc. But good god the last 5 years with two small kids have been so hard with crippling childcare fees. We only get the '30 free hours' for our youngest from next month and were looking forward to having slightly more money and finding out everyone will be getting this from 9 months has killed me. It would have saved us thousands and thousands of pounds and made such a difference to our quality of life. As it is we have depleted our savings and living hand to mouth due to childcare.
I don't want others to experience that, changers were 100% needed but bloody hell. We missed the boat on affordable housing, free HE etc etc (by a long way) but just too early for this. Gaaaaah!! Anyone else??

OP posts:
Aftjbtibg · 15/03/2023 09:16

I feel bad admitting to feeling the same; I’m so happy that other people will benefit from this but having counted down the time I’m now gutted it wasn’t introduced a year or two ago.

Aftjbtibg · 15/03/2023 09:19

Equally though I’m worried about the effect it will have on the childcare industry as the government don’t generally pay enough to cover those 30 hours and it needs supplementing somehow. If as a childminder you charge £4 an hour and the government will only give you £3.75 an hour then that’s a loss and some childminders and nurseries won’t be able to carry on. In my area childcare is already an huge issue with not enough and I worry it will get worse so I’m glad to be on my way out of it.

Original poster
DownInTheDumpster · 15/03/2023 09:21

@Aftjbtibg I know the sensible part of me knows that. I hope if they do it they do it properly- fund it properly and invest in the childcare sector as a whole. And I'd never say it outloud as it's selfish but yeah I just feel so low today. It would have changed our lives!

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Youcancallmeirrelevant · 15/03/2023 09:21

But you chose to have 2 children close together leading to double nursery fees. Myself, and a lot of people i know chose to have much bigger age gaps as we didn't want to have to pay 2 lots of childcare.

Everyone can only make decisions based on what is available at the time

smellyflowers · 15/03/2023 09:24

Yeah it's hard but good for those that come after us.

Very worried about how this is going to impact the sector though..it doesn't seem well thought through.

smellyflowers · 15/03/2023 09:25

Youcancallmeirrelevant · 15/03/2023 09:21

But you chose to have 2 children close together leading to double nursery fees. Myself, and a lot of people i know chose to have much bigger age gaps as we didn't want to have to pay 2 lots of childcare.

Everyone can only make decisions based on what is available at the time

Yes this. We had to make the best decision at the time.

smellyflowers · 15/03/2023 09:26

DownInTheDumpster · 15/03/2023 09:21

@Aftjbtibg I know the sensible part of me knows that. I hope if they do it they do it properly- fund it properly and invest in the childcare sector as a whole. And I'd never say it outloud as it's selfish but yeah I just feel so low today. It would have changed our lives!

They won't. They need to stop calling it "free" and call it partially funded. Make it a discount.

Original poster
DownInTheDumpster · 15/03/2023 09:26

@Youcancallmeirrelevant we did the same and timed number 2 starting nursery when the first got free hours! Kids are 5 and 3.
And yes I know- it's great and I'm glad it's finally happening! Just the timing hurts...!

OP posts:
Mumoftwoinprimary · 15/03/2023 09:26

Mine are a bit older but I see myself as super lucky.

With Dd (12) we only got 15 hours. Ds (9) was supposed to miss the 30 hours by a year but we lived in a “test area” which meant there was a plan to bring it in a year early. For months it looked like it wouldn’t happen (there were problems with the funding) but just before the date it was brought in.

To you 30 hours is normal. But for us - who had already had one child with only 15 hours - to get 30 hours was amazing!

Mutabiliss · 15/03/2023 09:28

I very much doubt it's going to work the way the Tories are suggesting it will. There simply isn't the capacity or staffing levels, and nurseries are already struggling. Unless government funding is way beyond what it is now for 3-4 year olds (and it's a Tory policy - it won't be) it just won't be feasible.

And yes, I have a child starting school in September so this would have really helped us. I hope it does work out well. But my suspicion is that the Tories are making a last-ditch attempt to win the next election by suggesting an unworkable policy.

Gwdiwho · 15/03/2023 09:28

Yeah, same here. It really is needed and Im glad other parents will benefit and not be in the same situation as us. Had we been offered the same, I could have returned to work much sooner and my career wouldn’t be the shit-show it is now.

tealandteal · 15/03/2023 09:28

We had to make the best decision based on what we knew then. The government may decide next year to cancel all funded hours. As it stands, I paid for childcare for my 5 year old and was fully prepared to pay for my 9 month old in a few months. It will be a massive gift if he gets funded hours, but I’m sure there’s always things changing. I have read the government are considering changing something to try and make sure that nurseries get more for the funded hours.

Pastadanca · 15/03/2023 09:29

It's a very British attitude to wish the same misery on others as you have struggled through just because it's 'not fair'. Personally I'm glad this will help others and not put them through the same financial misery as we faced.

Aftjbtibg · 15/03/2023 09:29

We also made sure that our DC were three years apart for childcare reasons but it still crippled us to pay for one and wrap around after school care

Original poster
DownInTheDumpster · 15/03/2023 09:32

Pastadanca · 15/03/2023 09:29

It's a very British attitude to wish the same misery on others as you have struggled through just because it's 'not fair'. Personally I'm glad this will help others and not put them through the same financial misery as we faced.

I am not wishing misery on anyone at all- Ive said multiple times I think it will be good and I hope it works out.
If you and your friend both but a lottery ticket and they win £1 million and you get nothing you're allowed to be a bit jealous!
100% we need more affordable childcare so I support it fully.

OP posts:
ticklemepinker · 15/03/2023 09:35

Mine are way older, and I am so so glad others will have what we didn’t. All these years on my career has still not recovered from gaps.

Iwouldlikesomecake · 15/03/2023 09:35

Twas ever thus. My borough was one of the only in the UK not to fund any nhs IVF at all- then they started doing it just after covid and so I was ‘eligible’ finally. But my AMH was too low by this point and I missed out entirely. We spent a fortune on one unsuccessful round, because the pandemic gave me a job that earned me enough to afford it. And so I won’t ever have kids. I can say ‘if only’ but it won’t change the past. I look at people training in my profession now who get so much more funding than I did, yes I resent it- BUT I was able to buy a house because I am a bit older and bought in the late 2000s. So it’s swings and roundabouts.

Pastadanca · 15/03/2023 09:36

DownInTheDumpster · 15/03/2023 09:32

I am not wishing misery on anyone at all- Ive said multiple times I think it will be good and I hope it works out.
If you and your friend both but a lottery ticket and they win £1 million and you get nothing you're allowed to be a bit jealous!
100% we need more affordable childcare so I support it fully.

Show quote history

Nope I'll never be bitter about initiatives which help women in the workplace. If my friend won the lottery I'd be over the moon for them, jealousy and bitterness doesn't do anyone any good it just eats you up.

whattodo1975 · 15/03/2023 09:37

I can see how you are gutted about this, think plenty will be.

I also cant help thinking that there will be a lot of parents with kids, 6 months, or those who are expecting, or were planning to have a child in the next few years who are also likely to be gutted.

A lot of people have often used "the cost of childcare" as a very valid reason for not returning to work. Now that reason may be taken away, there will be a lot of people begrudgingly returning to work who had been hoping to put off going back for another couple of years.

Dodgeitornot · 15/03/2023 09:37

I sympathise with you. I think at a time of change there will always be feelings of bitterness. Try not to think about it that way. I really can't imagine how many nurseries will even be able to provide this, the government doesn't pay them enough to cover the free hours and I can only imagine they will be raising ratios and nurseries will be expecting parents to heavily subsidise the free hours.
I am also imagining that those on UC will be expected to get back to full time work quicker, without due thought to actual availability of said 'free' spaces.

smellyflowers · 15/03/2023 09:38

Iwouldlikesomecake · 15/03/2023 09:35

Twas ever thus. My borough was one of the only in the UK not to fund any nhs IVF at all- then they started doing it just after covid and so I was ‘eligible’ finally. But my AMH was too low by this point and I missed out entirely. We spent a fortune on one unsuccessful round, because the pandemic gave me a job that earned me enough to afford it. And so I won’t ever have kids. I can say ‘if only’ but it won’t change the past. I look at people training in my profession now who get so much more funding than I did, yes I resent it- BUT I was able to buy a house because I am a bit older and bought in the late 2000s. So it’s swings and roundabouts.

Oh that seems so unfair. I'm sorry.

smellyflowers · 15/03/2023 09:39

whattodo1975 · 15/03/2023 09:37

I can see how you are gutted about this, think plenty will be.

I also cant help thinking that there will be a lot of parents with kids, 6 months, or those who are expecting, or were planning to have a child in the next few years who are also likely to be gutted.

A lot of people have often used "the cost of childcare" as a very valid reason for not returning to work. Now that reason may be taken away, there will be a lot of people begrudgingly returning to work who had been hoping to put off going back for another couple of years.

That's very true. I always wanted to go part time and spend time with my baby so the childcare costing too much helped make that decision make financial sense too.

RagingWoke · 15/03/2023 09:39

I'm very happy to see this announced, and I genuinely hope it's done well and doesn't destroy childcare providers. Truly life changing for so many!

but yes absolutely I am just a bit jealous that it's coming after I've paid thousands (quick calculation it's about £60k over 2 kids 🤢) in childcare and any saving would have had such a huge impact for us. Very grateful for the 30 hours the 3yo currently gets and the tax free schemes, but still... sixty thousand pounds

NurseryNurse10 · 15/03/2023 09:39

I can't see it being successfully implemented due to the dire staffing issues and lack of qualified staff. People seem to be really happy about it, not realising that it can't go ahead without this. If they are also planning on relaxing ratios and not increasing staff pay then even more reason why it just won't work.

Dodgeitornot · 15/03/2023 09:40

This is obviously a move to increase the birth rate and active workforce but really, whilst I'm happy for those who will benefit, I genuinely can see this becoming a mess. A lot of parents will be complaining about the rate they have to subsidise for sub par care with over worked nursery staff that have increased ratios. The people who paid through the nose up till now will say you don't know how good you've got it. Etc etc.