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Original poster

Can I teach baby to stop grabbing?

15 replies

waitingwaitingwaiting2 · 13/03/2023 19:51

DD is 5 mos, don’t remember this at all with my first. Whenever I pick up DD, she grabs some part of me: hair, neck, cheeks. It’s quite painful! I keep her nails trimmed as much as possible but the squeezing and grip are what hurts. Do they just grow out of this or is there something I can do?

OP posts:

SparkleSpangle · 13/03/2023 19:54

It's an instinctive reflex. They grow out of it eventually. I kept my hair tied back and removed necklaces.

SparkleSpangle · 13/03/2023 19:56

Oops posted too soon. If it is really bothering you give her a toy or blanket to hold before you pick her up.

MrsTerryPratchett · 13/03/2023 20:00

Chop your hair off and buy a toy with a 'neck' like Sophie the giraffe. She can strangle that for two years looking at you DD.

DD was never without some poor toy or body part being strangled. It did seem to help her be very confident if she had something to grab. As well as now, at 2, she can open jars really easily (strong hands).

But no, you can't train it out of them. Newborns can hang off a clothesline naturally. DON'T do this at home.

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IndulgentFrazzle · 13/03/2023 20:06

I had to get contact lenses at this stage, my glasses were being swiped off my face permanently!

NoKnit · 13/03/2023 20:07

Brace yourself for the random emptying out of drawers and cupboards is my advice. Yes they do grow out of it though.

Original poster

waitingwaitingwaiting2 · 13/03/2023 20:08

Thank you, yes hair is always tied back, no necklaces and no dangling earrings! I’ve tried giving comforters but she much prefers a handful of my flesh or my hair. I will persevere and patiently await her outgrowing this clutching phase!

OP posts:

chillih · 13/03/2023 20:09

16mo DS still loves to do this 😑 you have my sympathy!

Original poster

waitingwaitingwaiting2 · 13/03/2023 20:31

@chillih 16 months?!? 😳😳😳

i just find it so odd as I have no recollection at all of my first doing this! I reckon they all have their own preferences!

OP posts:

NuffSaidSam · 13/03/2023 20:48

Just keep moving her hands away and telling her 'gentle hands' or something similar. She will eventually get it.

If you can, pick her up facing out. Give her something to hold before picking her up.

WhatsMyFate · 13/03/2023 20:56

My 18 months old still does this. Her older brother never did. It was so painful when she was younger especially when BF, she would just claw at my face and chest. Urgh, you have my sympathies.

Now it's limited to her pinching the skin on our hands, she does it to get to sleep in the evening, and does it when we hold her. I think it's just her happy place.

We have been able to train her to do it in a way that's not painful now though (most of the time!), so there's hope!

Boshi · 13/03/2023 21:06

My 10 month old is like this.. ugh so much pain! My older two were never like this.. she has a vice like grip. No advice just solidarity 😅

Original poster

waitingwaitingwaiting2 · 14/03/2023 03:30

@WhatsMyFate hiw did you manage to train yours? I’ve tried giving her something else to hold, in a variety of different textures, but no luck. I’ve got curly hair so there’s always some strands ablut. And can’t do much about my neck or cheeks!

OP posts:

WhatsMyFate · 14/03/2023 09:24

I tried giving her various other things to fiddle with instead but that never worked. We basically took our hand (or whatever else) away when she was hurting us and said "gentle" and basically kept repeating it until she was doing it gently. It wasn't great for about 2 or 3 days as she got so mad everytime we moved our hand away and didn't let her torture us like she wanted to!

But eventually she did understand and she is very good now. I think she was just over 12 months when we 'trained' her.

My hands were so dry from the cold weather as it was and the pinching and scratching was making them bleed. I realised it had gone too far!

Original poster

waitingwaitingwaiting2 · 14/03/2023 12:55

@WhatsMyFate thank you! I reckon mines a bit too young to properly train but can’t hurt to start trying now!

OP posts:

Boshi · 18/03/2023 11:02

Def start now mine is 10 month old and in the last few min while feeding she’s kicked the life out of me, pinching the backs of my arms so hard I can hear her nails turn in, sucking on other parts of boobs hard so it hurts, suffocating my nose with her little hand and scratching my face my god 😂 I’d cry if I didn’t laugh about it

she managed to break off a solid chunk of hair out earlier so I know have a layered hairstyle on the right side of my face 😣

any other tips, she does it through the night as well so it makes Co-sleeping so hard though i want to continue.. is there such a thing as a stress ball for babies?

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