Lost perspective...what is normal food???

[daisiesdahlias]

So, I am obese and always eaten big portions of high calorie foods really. My parents were v young when they had me and have said they regret the food they raised me on, they didn't know how to cook and never thought about health. Not to blame them, just to give context of my idea of normal growing up.

So, I need to change how I eat. But I feel like I have no perspective on what is normal. A (slim and healthy) friend yesterday said she couldn't make dinner without going to the shop as she had no veg in. I thought - so?? Cheesy pasta, toasties, sausage and mash? I've lost all perspective.

So please tell me - in a normal busy week (not an 'ideal' or 'healthy' week) what are some normal things you have for breakfast lunch and dinner?

Ah, sorry! Just read you are vegetarian.

It is much, much harder to eat enough protein (IMO) if you’re veggie.

Sorry if this answer is a big no, but would you consider eating some fish?

Standard day for me OP:

Breakfast - porridge with milk and (vegetarian) protein powder and fruit

lunch- sandwich consisting of 2 pieces of bread spread and some veggie pate. Side salad and yoghurt.

snacks- fruit and tea.

tea- some ideas- veggie chilli and rice with veg; 1 Quorn chicken slice, baked potato and salad, lentil dal and naan bread; egg, home made chips and peas.

pudding- treat like a few squares chocolate or options hot chocolate or bag of low cal popcorn.

Today i've eaten:

Coffee for breakfast (stopped eating breakfast around a year ago. I'm not a morning person, and feel sick if faced with food. Finally gave myself a permission to do 'me' and feel great)

Lunch: a roll with chilli prawns and rocket, a side salad with carrot, cabbage and pineapple

Snack: yoghurt with blueberries and sugar on top

Dinner: Chicken wings and baked potatoes with a side of rocket and beetroot

Some of the salads were shop-bought. Dinner home cooked.

I do feel the need to eat fresh things every day. I feel bad if there's no freshness (veg/fruit/berries) going into my body. I do have a sweet tooth though and eat too much chocolate and sweets generally. And if theres cake or bisquits in the office...im there..

My bmi is 24..I'm short so would feel more comfortable a bit slimmer, but not too bothered..

Two friends did www.totalwellbeingdiet.com/au/resources/guides/ and so I bought the cookbook online (as I'm not in Aussie) which has a huge number of recipes.

Its a great start to changing the mindset as what is healthy and what to serve!

The main thing to is to menu plan and shop for that so you have the necessary foods in your home, otherwise you will just pick through whatever is in the cupboard.

There are so many plans and diets and healthy eating plans.

I say to make permanent change, start with one thing.

I have upped my protein consumption considerably and I only have lean protein. So eggs, fish, chicken, Turkey and veg protein.

And I've increased the nutritional value of everything. That's it. As a result I'm less hungry and my consumption of junk foods and ultra processed food has gone down considerably. I still eat every rams don't restrict myself but I naturally don't get the cravings.

It's so hard to change habits! I grew up with farmer/gardener grandparents so our tables always had a lot of veg dishes. My own parents didn't grow their own but still have us a lot of veg. Nowadays i always have frozen peas, spinach, corn and brussel sprouts, and fresh tomatoes, courgettes, cauliflower, broccoli, aubergine, mushrooms, green beans and carrots as well as lettuce, cucumber and beet root and occasionally red bell pepper, though they seem extravagant now. Every lunch and dinner has at least half of these either in it or roasted or steamed as a side. And sometimes my breakfasts do too as i like a stirfry with fried eggs! Just make your meals but as in veg. Aim to increase the ratio of veg to the rest up to half. Our meals are often 0.75 veg 0.25 protein and starch.

As an example from me

• breakfast: 2 eggs plus a slice if toast
• lunch: chicken with sweet chili sauce, green beans and hash brown
• dinner: pasta with tomato and aubergine sauce + feta cheese

What I’m aiming for is half if my plate is veg (not root vegs), a quarter is protein and the last quarter is carbs (rice, pasta, root vegetables etc..,)

We make these a lot because and my fussy 4 year old will eat a lot of them (without the chillis in).

They’re mostly homemade but they’re all easy and quick to make (with exceptions - I buy the jerk paste, gochujang paste, use flatbreads for the pizza). Generally put a simple chopped salad on the side for everything (fresh tomatoes and cucumber, coriander, lemon juice, salt and olive oil).
We eat meat maybe once a week, if not less.

Dinners;
Yellow/chana Daal and rice, with cucumber raita

vegan spag bol (puy lentils with tomatoes, herbs, onion, garlic)

Jerk chicken, rice & peas, sweetcorn cobs

Chicken tikka marinated skewers with roti or rice

Homemade pizza

Bibimbap style dish (rice with sautéed veggies, pickles/kimchi, gochujang chilli sauce and a fried egg on top - super easy and filling)

Curried udon noodle soup, i copied the vegan wagamama recipe with shichimi marinated fried tofu and mushroom

pastas with homemade sauces - easy way to get veggies in (aubergines, courgette, tomatoes, onion, garlic)

we also eat baked potatoes/sweet potatoes with beans

Lunch is usually light on carbs otherwise i get a slump;
scrambled egg or an omelette with avocado, feta/mozzarella

Caprese salad

half arsed sandwich and an apple

To start you off with a shock to the system, buy a pack of special k and measure out their recommended portion. It’s depressing. That’s the portion size for most meals you can eat if you want to maintain a healthy weight while mostly eating carb heavy meals.

I get around this by treating vegetables as basically being calorie free so they are added into every meal as bulkers so I can have at least a couple of portions guilt free. Stuff like cottage pie will have tons of onions, carrots, leeks, celery, mushrooms and tomatoes in it but I understand how difficult it is to shake off habits that you grew up with. My mum will still do a cottage pie with just mince, onions and gravy which I struggle to eat nowadays.

Breakfast - overnight oats with protein powder and berries and greek yogurt

Morning snack - small bag of mixed nuts

Lunch - chicken salad with whatever I had in the fridge, including avocado, tomatoes, leaves, cucumber, grated carrots, chopped bacon and some dressing and seeds

afternoon snack - a go ahead cereal bar

Dinner - beef hot pot with lots of carrot, mushrooms and suede mixed in, and French beans (this was a mindful chef recipe box)

evening snack - handful of wine gums and a 25g milk bar

Have only drink water plus 3 cups of tea.

OP - a good rule of thumb is don't buy anything you couldn't buy in a butchers, fishmongers, farmshop or greengrocers direct from the fridge or shelf. Anything that has a brand name or can be advertised is generally processed food.

Start there and see how you get on.

This evening we had salmon baked with chilli and lemon juice, salad, steamed broccoli cauliflower and carrot, home made roast potatoes.

Tomorrow probably omelette with veg in, salad, potatoes.

Next day bean casserole with brown rice and salad.

We used to live in a country where it was normal to have salad with every meal and I mostly still do this. So we usually have cooked veg plus salad on a weeknight. At weekends I do a bigger variety of veg eg roast broccoli, roast cauliflower, roast carrot plus another carb ( like potato or rice). I roast the veg in very little oil and flavour it with garlic or paprika.

This is brilliant advice for the op, I'm sure it won't have occurred to her what good food looks like.

Op literally said she doesn't know what to eat. She doesn't know what good food looks like.

Usual for me is Greek yogurt (full fat) with some low sugar granola, nuts & raisins (a big handful) - weekends usually eggs, bacon etc

Lunch at work is sandwich on brown with either cheese, tuna, egg, chicken or ham some veg sticks and piece of fruit or a soup

Dinner is anything! burger chips & salad, curry, spaghetti bolognaise, always have a Dessert such as crumble & custard (homemade), trifle or slice of cake etc

I do not snack at all in the week, weekends I'm more relaxed and might just have 2 larger meals and evening snacks like crisps / chocolate

OP - I am in a similar position to you, many of my meals don’t contain veg (though others have lots of it!)
I think you need to figure out why – do you not like vegetables? Do you not know how to cook them? Do you feel they take too long?
Or, in my case, I live on my own & only do a big grocery shop about once a month and I find it difficult to keep veg fresh - at least in a variety. I do use some frozen but some veg is quite frankly horrid frozen (sprouts I’m looking at you - love you raw/fresh though!)

Breakfast- normally toast and light cheese spread or marmite with white coffee. Occasionally natural yogurt with some blueberries and honey in it or granola and milk.
Lunch- if I'm at home normally a sandwich with brown bread- cheese or ham, occasionally tuna. I try to add a veg to it- tomato or cucumber. A bag of crisps- normally the lower calorie ones like quavers and often a choc bar.
Sometimes tuna pasta salad, scrambled egg or beans on toast and occasionally leftovers from the night before.
If I'm out often a sausage roll and a cake but I know that's not healthy!
Dinner- we eat pretty healthily- mostly cooked from scratch. Curries, pasta bolognese- meat or lentil, chicken fried rice, satay chicken, chilli- meat or veggie, lentil cottage pie have all featured recently. Nearly all have 1 or mostly 2 portions of veg in them, if not I do frozen veg on the side.
About once a week we have a oven meal- burgers/fish fingers/sausages/chicken nuggets etc with chips and beans or veg.
Sometimes have a filled pasta as a quick meal and always do some salad with that.

My down fall is snacking in the evening- nearly always have some choc and often a bag of crisps too.

I could do with losing a few pounds but nothing major for perspective.

Oh salmon features fairly regularly for dinner too- just oven baked in foil with cous cous and veg

Protein is key in helping you feel full.
For a vegetarian, things with egg or pulses.

Omlettes are great with veg mixed in (onion, courgette)or a salad on the side.

Egg fried rice (low on oil and lots of egg) with salad.

Chili,(doesn't have to be spicy) I use two onions, some garlic then just a handful of quorn mince, add a whole can of kidney beans, whole can of chickpeas and a whole can of black beans. I love this texture without any added tomatoes although some people add a tin of tomatoes. You can flavour it with spices.

Lentils are a good source of protein, sometimes I make a lentil chilli similar to the above.

In a normal week, not trying to be particularly healthy we we would have these meals, not necessarily all in the same week:
Spaghetti bolognese (made from scratch with veg in the sauce)
Sausages, mash & carrots, peas
Lasagne made from scratch, similar sauce to bolognese
Roast dinner
Macaroni cheese
Seabass, potatoes and green beans
Chilli and rice, veg in the sauce and garlic bread
Home made pizza
Jacket potatoes with various toppings
Pasta dishes usually contain some veg
We also sometimes have hello fresh delivered which is good to give new meal ideas

I eat more or less what I want but it’s mostly all healthy stuff. I have fruit and veg for every meal too. Today I’ve had:
Porridge Oats made with skimmed milk and water and frozen mixed berries
Jacket potato, tuna and a big salad
Skinny sausages, another jacket potato, cauliflower, cabbage and a small frozen yorkie pud with gravy
An apple and a cup a soup

You've said you're a veggie so adding protein is the challenge (so you don't bulk up on carbs and cheese as you say).

Do you eat eggs? If so that's a good addition for protein.

Spanish omelette or frittata with potatoes, and any veg you can bung into it (try a rainbow - mushrooms, tomatoes or peppers, spinach). You could use Linda McCartney sausages too.

Veggie sausage casserole. Tin of chopped tomatoes, sliced onions, aubergine and courgettes - bung into baking dish and pop into oven. Then add sausages and cheese and bake a bit more.

Chickpeas is good for protein. You can blitz can of chickpeas and can of corn and some spinach with eggs - then pan fry the batter into fritters. And have with poached eggs and salsa.

When you make curries or stir fries use tofu or seitan - you can get stir fry kits in supermarket for the veg and sauce.

Breakfast - porridge or muesli and greek yoghurt with honey, fruit and handful of nuts. You can buy frozen fruit and defrost it night before too.

Trick is to try and add veg to your main meal rather than as a salad as it's easier to cook and eat if. So for a cheesy pasta dish I'd bung in some veg like aubergine/mushrooms/peppers/leeks.

Breakfast is two slices of buttered toast OR a bowl of granola OR one slice of toast and a banana.

Lunch is a sandwich, sometimes a small bag of crisps with it.

Mid afternoon (ie before kids are home) I'll have a quiet cuppa and 2 biscuits

Dinner. Bangers (2) mash and veg
Lasagne a square about 4"x4" and salad
Stir fry. Usuallly chicken and veg
Slow cooker whole chicken potatoes and veg

Usually portion a fist sized potato/pasta/rice per person so adaptable to everyone

Hope this helps?

Just to add I was raised eating like this so it's normal to me. I'm 5'10" and weight 10 stone.

Definitely agree with the previous posters who said to ensure everything comes with veg! This is something I've fallen down on in the past.

Some examples of what I'm having this week are below... all recipes serve x4, ie, dinner for two and then lunch for two the next day.

• Chicken salad (poached & shredded chicken with rocket, spinach leaves, tomato, celery, cucumber, some small pieces of mozzarella/similar with mustard & apple cider dressing).
• Courgette fritters (grated courgette, bit of garlic, mixed herbs, spring onion, parmesan & egg to bind) - will add a side of green beans or broccolini, or whatever vegetables are in the fridge.
• Teriyaki Salmon with some sort of veg.
• Greek Salad (cos lettuce, olives, feta, red peppers, capers, red onion & oregano dressing).
• Something pulled out of the freezer - ie, soup or chilli.
• Probably a takeaway or quick meal from outside of the house at some point - just because my meal planning hasn't covered the whole week this time around.