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Normal NT 4yo behaviour?

6 replies

MeiInMay · 12/03/2023 20:50

DS is 4yo. He's pretty intelligent, asks loads of questions, enjoys numbers and jigsaws (100 piece at the moment), not at school yet but can read fairly long words. He enjoys audiobooks and knows books which are 100s of pages long off by heart. One to one he can be a delight.

He is ok socially, had a bit of trouble with listening at nursery but back on track now. I think he's completely ready for school academically and a bit bored of nursery.

But he is very fixed and rigid in his thinking. Once he gets something in his mind he finds it difficult to change path.
But he's ok with day to day change.

He can have meltdowns about not getting his own way. He fell apart today on 2 occasions. Firstly, he couldn't buy something from a fancy gallery of expensive items which were completely inappropriate for a 4yo (he gets very overwhelmed in shops) and secondly, we had some cake in the bag for the afternoon and he couldn't get it out of his mind. Both resulted in 30 minutes of sobbing. Most days out have some disaster which I think comes from fixed thinking.

I'm starting to wonder whether there might be something else at play. Socially he doesn't show the typical signs of ASD but I wonder whether it might be something that should be explored. Any family members / friends would look at me like I have 2 heads if I suggested this!

OP posts:
MeiInMay · 12/03/2023 20:54

To add, he plays well with his sister, enjoys imaginative play but can sometimes seem a little lost, wandering aimlessly.

If out he couldn't care less if he goes out of our sight. Will wander off alone, needs to be watched like a hawk!

OP posts:
Newuser82 · 12/03/2023 21:00

Hmm... my son is also 4. The first paragraph I would say sounded just like him. Not getting his own way, yes he can get cross about it but it is generally short lived. He got cross today as his brother was buying a toy with his birthday money and he couldn't have one. He stamped his foot a couple of times and that was it. Sometimes he will cry but generally it doesn't last too long.

We have been told he listens well at nursery and is making nice friendships.

I don't think he would care less if we weren't there either 😂

surreygirl1987 · 12/03/2023 21:14

Sounds a lot like my son, although I have suspected that he may be on the spectrum for similar reasons to you. My son certainly can't memorise 100-0age books though, nor can he read yet.

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MeiInMay · 12/03/2023 21:42

I think he will probably come through this and I will look back on the difficult times as just a phase. But if it is something that needs exploring then I don't want to have avoided it and find he has difficulties later.

Though I don't know what I'd do to explore it.

OP posts:
MeiInMay · 13/03/2023 07:25

Bump for the morning

OP posts:
frozendaisy · 13/03/2023 07:37

I would talk to his nursery teachers first.
Just a gentle enquiry.
They will have seen hundreds of 4 year olds and should be able to compare if you like and you can ask if they have any concerns and if they think he needs to be assessed.

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