Husband working away for weeks at a time and I'm drowning

[abroadandbored]

He works hard and has managed to put enough away doing this job to get us out of a council flat and bought a run down house in a run down area. So we are doing really well... for people like us.

I am drowning in mess(despite getting the house spotless in Wednesday for the health visitor) it's snowed badly so I can't get out, kids are bored and have burned through about 20 outfits playing in the snow mud
we had to do some schoolwork from home which was met with enthusiasm from one child and a series of tantrums from the other.

I also have a toddler and a baby (why? don't ask me) and the older ones are just running me ragged.

this week they have
-broken 3 bed slats by jumping on the bed
-eaten every biscuit, chocolate, yoghurt and even sweet cereal for the house, and we did a 3 week shop so I wouldn't have to do a big shop while dh is away
-opened a 'tattoo kit' and rubbed glitter and ink all over the walls.
Broke the pantry door to get to the sweets up above.

I'm currently sat in bed wondering why I'm not an alcoholic yet because this would be a lot easier if I was drunk.

DH has to work, I get that, but he has 3 consecutive weeks in Scotland (we are south) and I am so tired. I've only got through week one and I can't face 2 more weeks of this shit.

He has to work more because out mortgage is double our council rent (it's worth it, we only had a 2 bed flat and this is the cheapest house in the world) and the kids are older and I'm on extended maternity (no job to go back to) and I'm most likely going to have to work a min wage job when baby goes to nursery and can't afford childcare (not that I'd get it, everywhere is full)

oh yay, I've just noticed 1,2,3,4,5,6... 7! Seven toys in the back garden and one on the bay window roof. That's staying there.

bf and sore and tired and I'm ill. Just come here for a moan but please does anyone have any tips how to shut my children up? I've considered duct taping them to the wall while I clean 😂 (those aren't tears of joy)

Ps we've done loads of crafting projects, gone out in the snow, made snowmen and frozen children, elaborate games (shops and restaurants) but I don't have unlimited imagination and every single fun game ends in squabbling.

Have a day off. What have you got in for their evening meal?

Tv/tablet time? A bath? Walk to a local cafe/coffee shop with activity books. We did that yesterday-took spare clothes as they got soaked on the way down.
It's so hard when the weathers crap.

Bridery- get older kids to tidy up, entertain toddler⁸etc in reward they get tablet time etc. Same for toddler on age appropriate level. U put feet up and sort baby.

Oh wow, 4 DC by yourself all snowed in including a bf baby, that is very hard going! And you are ill on top of that - miserable!
If the older 2 are school age, then they are old enough not to behave so badly even if they are bored. I'd set them to work cleaning up the mess, and don't bother replacing the stuff that they've broken/eaten ( unless the slats are on your bed, not theirs). Hopefully you've read them riot act, and maybe D can back you up in a video call, it's really not OK for them to be behaving like that when they should be helping you out - they need to get the concept of all pulling together.
Is there anyone at all who can take any of the Dc for a little while out of the house? Or someone who can come and help you? Is there any spare money to pay for a local teenager to come and occupy the older DC for a bit? Can DH come home for the weekend, if not now then next weekend?
Meanwhile, I wouldn't even bother trying to clean at least until the older ones are back in school.
It is really tough dealing with the DC all by yourself, especially when things go wrong, like snow and illness, you have all our sympathies xx

Yeah, lower your standards, it's fine if the walls are glittery for a while.

Do you get your kids to clean up after they do stuff like that ? I do (but I only have two atm !)

If the older ones are 7-8yo or older and don't have one yet, I'd seriously consider getting them a video game system (make them earn it by behaving well for 6 months !) you can probably find something second hand cheap enough. That should keep them busy for hours at a time while you tend to the younger two.

Getting them to help around the house also kills two birds with one stone - gets them busy and helps keep the house in a better state. And making them see that cleaning isn't that fun may entice them to being a bit more careful when playing.

dh is on video call with the toddler while I'm having a tea and the older ones are shut up fir the moment.
It's probably because I'm ill and it's like a 4 day weekend (hell)
I'm so embarrassed I don't have anyone to ask and dh can't get home because he's be driving six hours there and back but with the roads and weather who knows? Also we can't really afford a days pay and we definitely can't afford the petrol money.

I wanted to surprise dh with our bedroom painted, but I've just noticed little picks of wall paper come off. Bloody toddler is absolutely wreaking havoc and the older ones are giving access to pens/ messy play items that I've put in my room hidden!

I know its all done in the long run but it's very wearing sat in q mess despite cleaning and being ill and looking after little ones.

Get home tomorrow morning and plan on doing nothing. Don't even attempt one of your normal routine jobs. Get your cup of tea and chill doing the bare minimum. Loll about doing as little as you can. Promise yourself you are doing nothing for all of tomorrow. By 4pm you'll feel a bit better and you'll do a tiny bit of sorting something out.