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We're almost conditioned to ignore indecent exposure

80 replies

RadioactiveWear · 10/03/2023 07:04

Libby Squires's mum talks out about indecent exposure. This is an interesting article. In the past, I have been flashed etc. and I don't remember reporting it.

These incidents need reporting now, as clearly the behaviour escalates and the police need to be put on the spot to investigate. They could have stopped both this and Sarah Everard's murder if they had pulled these 2 men in on their behaviour and dealt with them in the first place.

This

OP posts:
DrHousecuredme · 10/03/2023 07:10

I reported being flashed once. The police were very nice, offering to send somebody round to talk if I was upset. When I said that I wasn't particularly upset just wanted them to go and look for him as he was standing in a busy high street with his penis out. They pretty much laughed in my face and said "oh he'll be long gone now" and weren't interested in taking any sort of statement.
I was surprised by this attitude to be honest.

anythinginapinch · 10/03/2023 07:31

I've been flashed at four times in my long life. All when much younger. I never reported and it never occurred to me. So from my pov you are correct

carriedout · 10/03/2023 07:35

I think the Police are a disgrace over this issue - sex offenders are known to escalate their behaviour but time and time again the Police just ignore it.

I am so angry at the Police these days.

FrancescaContini · 10/03/2023 07:39

I agree. I heard this being discussed by Justin Webb on Today earlier this week.

I don’t know a single woman it HASN’T happened to.

Whatwouldscullydo · 10/03/2023 07:45

There also seems to be a tendency to talk ourselves out of it. As in instead of recognising its a sexual offense its minimised by assuming the man is mentally ill or disabled or whatever, despite the fact that most who are actually mentally ill or disabled. Manage not to flash their penis at others. Its like a collective Stockholm syndrome or something.

It also doesn't help that our teens and tweens are being taught that women can have a penis so instead if seeing a predetory male exposing themselves he could just be a woman with a penis, and they are the victim of the child looking at them. They won't be able to tell the difference between the two so won't bother reporting it either .

Yogagrandmum · 10/03/2023 07:47

I imagine most women have been flashed…

Justbetweenus · 10/03/2023 07:53

I was flashed by a neighbour. The police took it more seriously than I expected. They saw it as ‘a gateway crime’ that escalates to other sexual offences, and they charged him. That was one east London station of the Met about 15 years ago. Shame it’s not a more common attitude.

Seventytwosunsetstrip · 10/03/2023 07:54

When we have this and told it's OK because it's "entertainment", it's pretty much a licence to every perv out there to get their dick out.

rjameson.medium.com/trans-comedian-plays-the-piano-with-her-penis-on-live-tv-good-ef090f641414

Greenfairydust · 10/03/2023 08:11

As usual it is because men's needs somehow are always seen as more important than women's safety.

So this is not taken seriously and the perpetrators can carry on and escalate their behaviour unchallenged.

Wowzel · 10/03/2023 08:14

It'll be interesting to see what the police do with that footballer that was flashing in a bar earlier this week

Bbq1 · 10/03/2023 08:25

I was once walking through a busy shortcut at 8am. Lots of young teens walking to school. As I approached along the path I saw a man openly masturbating. I continued to approach for a second then shouted to him, "You are disgusting". The path backed into the fire station with a low wall so I stepped over the wall and told the fire station. They said they would look but if course he'd disappointed by then. Truly vile to be doing that at 8am in a busy area knowing children and women would be around.

Bbq1 · 10/03/2023 08:26

disappeared even.

Seventytwosunsetstrip · 10/03/2023 08:27

Wowzel · 10/03/2023 08:14

It'll be interesting to see what the police do with that footballer that was flashing in a bar earlier this week

Yes it will.

Apparently Walker was also caught breaking coronavirus lockdown rules on three occasions – once to host a sex party.

So it seems this overpaid under endowed (brain cell-wise) thinks laws of decency don't apply to him.

MarshaMelrose · 10/03/2023 08:31

FrancescaContini · 10/03/2023 07:39

I agree. I heard this being discussed by Justin Webb on Today earlier this week.

I don’t know a single woman it HASN’T happened to.

Well, it hasn't happened to me. So now you know one person, at least.
But it's interesting it's so prevalent. I shall have to ask friends their experiences.

gazpachosoupday · 10/03/2023 08:34

I havent happened to me, but I am in the minority of my friends and probably more by luck than anything else

DisplayPurposesOnly · 10/03/2023 08:39

I don’t know a single woman it HASN’T happened to.

I was in my mid 40s so I was beginning to think I would escape that particular experience.

I did report it, not because I expected the man to be caught for that particular time, but to make them aware of an incident in case there were more and or it escalated.

CombatBarbie · 10/03/2023 08:40

Not flashing per se but my neighbour was using his garden as a toilet and done it in front of both my then 13yr and 8yr old DDs on seperate occasions. Made no attempt to turn his back. We called police, nothing happened.... Just got told don't do it again.

Whatwouldscullydo · 10/03/2023 08:47

CombatBarbie · 10/03/2023 08:40

Not flashing per se but my neighbour was using his garden as a toilet and done it in front of both my then 13yr and 8yr old DDs on seperate occasions. Made no attempt to turn his back. We called police, nothing happened.... Just got told don't do it again.

I dont know what it is abkut men that they really don't seem to care if anyone sees them.pee.

On a couple of occasions I've had to go into the mens loos at work after customers reported a concern about someone in there and a welfare check was required. So, as a woman you do the thing. Knock loudly. Announce loudly that you are female staff and need to come in is everyone OK with that. Which in theory gives ample opportunity for the.men to say " just a second " and they can finish up put themselves away etc. Instead they just say yeah go ahead and carry on peeing. They also don't lock.doors and appear to have no issue of it gets opened on them.

Most odd

HoppingMarchHares · 10/03/2023 08:49

Yogagrandmum · 10/03/2023 07:47

I imagine most women have been flashed…

I haven't. I'm actually surprised at how many have been!

StaySpicy · 10/03/2023 09:02

I have been flashed as such, but back in three summer of 2021, I was hosting session for toddlers and preschool children in the local woods. About 5-10 minutes after our had finished and they'd left, I saw a naked man walking along the same path (it was a very warm day). I was wary of making myself known as I was packing up alone, so I didn't approach him. But I was shocked that anyone thought a public wood in the middle of a warm day was a good place to go for a naked walk. It was fortunate none of the children at my session had seen him. It made me angry that he was okay with there being the chance that could happen. No-one should have to see a penis unless it's theirs or they have consented.

StaySpicy · 10/03/2023 09:03

I haven't been flashed as such, I meant.

FlowersareEverything · 10/03/2023 09:09

I haven’t been flashed at. I don’t know anyone who has either, or at last they haven’t told me that they have. It’s disgraceful if reports of this are being ignored by the police.

Return2thebasic · 10/03/2023 09:11

Have little faith in the police force these days. They are either in budget constraints with few personnel to do anything in the community, or with low quality recruits like those policemen who were supposed to be eradicated long ago because of their own offence records, or the impression pretty crimes are no crime.

This society is heavily leaning towards masculinity. Too many things that are wrong have been tolerated. Almost hopeless.

Return2thebasic · 10/03/2023 09:12

Petty crimes

Whatwouldscullydo · 10/03/2023 09:15

Have little faith in the police force these days. They are either in budget constraints with few personnel to do anything in the community, or with low quality recruits like those policemen who were supposed to be eradicated long ago because of their own offence records, or the impression pretty crimes are no crime

There does seem to be time and resources however to record non crime incidents. Particularly if it involves women hurting mens feelings.