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Original poster

How to break screen time habit?

21 replies

YouFilthyAnimal · 09/03/2023 10:11

We have got into the habit of basically all of our free time being spent on some screen or another
One of the children has ADHD and obsessive tendencies and I have very much used iPads as a way to get him to sit down and shut up essentially, they even watch iPads while they’re eating and whilst watching films they’re still building on minecraft or whatever
Thing is now if I even suggest the idea of turning them off world war 3 erupts and the tantrums go on for so long it’s honestly not even worth it sometimes

Has anyone successfully broken the habit/addiction in kids??
Is there any screen time which is more valuable than others that I can maybe replace with? I’ve read films are the best but they barely have the attention span to make it through a film now 🤦🏻‍♀️

Any tips?
Please no judgment, I realise this is not good parenting and I want to change

OP posts:
LuvMyBoyz · 09/03/2023 11:27

Bumping for you. I’ve no answers because my own screen time habit is something I haven’t managed to get under control.

disappointed101 · 09/03/2023 11:36

Following this as I have two who spend way too much time on screen

Dacadactyl · 09/03/2023 11:37

Well I've never been in your shoes, but I would start small.

So, tell them you are no longer going to allow them to watch screens when eating. Then build it up from there.

I would say, don't allow youtube shorts either but I'd start with no screens at the table.

What else do your kids like doing? How old are they? Would they help you prepare food?

Interested in this thread?

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Families
Yuja · 09/03/2023 11:38

I don't know if this would work for you but we have set times that they can use a screen. We also have the full hour before going to sleep designated as reading time - it's reading or sleeping - no other choice.
Another thing we have is reading targets - like, read 2 books a month or something and have it on a chart, the adults join in too. When we reach the targets we will go get a treat of their choice. This motivates them to read more, screen less and also forced me and DH to stop pointlessly scrolling all the time!

WhyIsBogdanSexy · 09/03/2023 11:40

I can't help but in the same boat.

I know I'm failing my children, especially my eldest. Screens are the default for him. His concentration span is not as good as it should be. He can't entertain himself well.

It's hard, as you say it's a way to keep them quiet and still while you do a million other things, he is really full on and if he's not contained with a screen it's absolute bedlam.

I do have the will to change, but need to just follow through, have strict limits we apply and actually make an effort to guide them to other things.

BonjourPetitPois · 09/03/2023 11:44

Yuja · 09/03/2023 11:38

I don't know if this would work for you but we have set times that they can use a screen. We also have the full hour before going to sleep designated as reading time - it's reading or sleeping - no other choice.
Another thing we have is reading targets - like, read 2 books a month or something and have it on a chart, the adults join in too. When we reach the targets we will go get a treat of their choice. This motivates them to read more, screen less and also forced me and DH to stop pointlessly scrolling all the time!

No real advice to give but just wanted to say what a brilliant idea this books/treat thing is. Definitely going to give this a go, as everything we have tried so far to reduce screen time in our house has fallen by the wayside... It's just so hard when you work all day and just need that bit of time to catch up on jobs at home.

NomadicSpirit · 09/03/2023 11:51

I'm looking into this for myself as my screen time has crept up alarmingly and I've seen that I am addicted. I am going to have to delete my MN account because of this.

Things you can do are:

  1. Change their screens to grey scale as it makes them less attractive
  2. Put timers on apps on their devices
  3. Turn off your wi-fi at a set time (Can be done at the router usually)
  4. Show them each how much time they are spending on it and the consequences its having on them and the rest of the family. You need to try to get them on board
  5. Introduce other things that you can do as a family instead of tech
  6. Have tech free meal times or tech free hour after school and no tech after 10pm and things like that.

I watched a TV program about this exact subject on one of the catchup channels the other night and it was very good. If I can recall what it was on, I'll let you know. All the people in that family were using phones too much and the family was dysfunctional. They now have a better relationship with tech and are happier as a consequence.

I think it starts by leading by example and letting the family know there is a problem and what the size of that problem is (how many hours hey spend on tech) and the impact. Then getting them involved in the solution. It might be hard at that point.

Monday and Tuesday I spent 8 hours each day on my phone and that's pathetic. I have a document to do for work by COP today and instead I'm writing this.

I've tried filters and greyscale and timers and I just end up bypassing them all. I'm currently charging up a Nokia 3310 with a view to changing to that and putting my smart phone away. Last week I worked on on my addiction and got my daily screen time down to two hours a day, which is still too much, but better than it was. This week though its lept back up because I'm a pathetic addict.

Topsy44 · 09/03/2023 12:07

Take comfort in that you are not alone. I know my DD has far too much screen time (as do I!) and it’s so difficult to break it. I have tried but she has suspected ASD so it’s not easy trying to break any routine! I am a lone parent too so when tiredness kicks in it’s just easy to resort to the screens. You have my sympathy and will be watching this thread for tips.

Also, well done for starting the thread as not easy to admit as a parent about too much screen time! Sometimes akin to committing an awful crime in some people’s minds!!!

NomadicSpirit · 09/03/2023 12:38

Result! Finally figured out how remove Chrome from my smart phone.

My dumb phone needs a different sim card size so that's not happening, but removing (disable) chrome from my phone will be a big step forward. Right. Lunch and then work.

By the way OP, when I did reduce my screen time last week I felt a hell of a lot happier. It is definitively worth it.

YukoandHiro · 09/03/2023 13:20

Work out the flashpoints in the day. We started with no TV Mon-Thurs (unless someone was off schools sick), and worked out that the real flashpoint was coming home and having nothing particular to do at that point in the day. Now we've started to arrange more play dates, book after school activities, or just take a long route home via the shops/park etc.
Then on Friday afternoons I allow some vegging out.

Perfect28 · 09/03/2023 13:22

I think just like how it creeps up it can creep back down. Planning alternative activities and just getting out the house more can help?

Ihopeitworksout · 09/03/2023 13:50

My partner is scrolling from the minute he gets in until the minute we go to bed. If you come up with a good plan please let me know. I’d love us to spend more time as a couple.

JustSoTired23 · 09/03/2023 13:55

Don't fully charge it or not everyday. When its out of charge they have to wait till next week day whe and charged overnight?

StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 09/03/2023 13:59

I've downloaded a book called how to break up with your phone but not read it yet.

Yuja · 11/03/2023 21:13

@BonjourPetitPois I would recommend trying it. Not only have our DC read absolutely loads, so have we - I read 28 books last year and have read 7 so far this year - all those hours not spent scrolling! My DS who was an outright reluctant reader a year ago, is now a free reader age 7 and genuinely enjoys it. His writing, which he used to struggle with, has also come on leaps and bounds.

Screens are by no means gone, but they are no long the sole focus and obsession of any of us, we are all a lot more present for each other. But I am saying this as the parent of neuro typical children so I don't know how easy this would be for DC with additional needs.

bringincrazyback · 11/03/2023 21:57

I struggle with this myself (suspected ADHD) and recently installed the Freedom app on my devices, it's made a huge difference.

BonjourPetitPois · 11/03/2023 21:58

Yuja · 11/03/2023 21:13

@BonjourPetitPois I would recommend trying it. Not only have our DC read absolutely loads, so have we - I read 28 books last year and have read 7 so far this year - all those hours not spent scrolling! My DS who was an outright reluctant reader a year ago, is now a free reader age 7 and genuinely enjoys it. His writing, which he used to struggle with, has also come on leaps and bounds.

Screens are by no means gone, but they are no long the sole focus and obsession of any of us, we are all a lot more present for each other. But I am saying this as the parent of neuro typical children so I don't know how easy this would be for DC with additional needs.

I sat down with the kids and made a list of treats yesterday to stick up on the wall, and another piece of paper to record what we have read. My son has already finished a book in the last few days. Thank you!

EatingWormsMichael · 11/03/2023 22:02

I've just started a thread asking similar. I feel awful guilt about screentime and know my family judge me for it. I think I'm going to try and leave the house for a bit 2moro so we have to give it a rest!

Blort · 11/03/2023 22:26

Following

NellyCortado · 11/03/2023 22:47

Good ideas. Going to give them a try with DCs.

Original poster
YouFilthyAnimal · 14/03/2023 11:39

I didn’t realise anyone had responded to this thread
Thank you for all the ideas, it’s so good to know I’m not the only one in this position too
I like the idea of it creeping down just as it crept up, I suppose that requires a lot less laziness from me (I’m just so bloody exhausted!!)
I might use this as a little diary

Counting my wins -
Over the weekend the 7 year old and I (the child with adhd) did a 100 piece jigsaw together! almost an hour of no screens (he chatted to me about minecraft the whole time but I’ll take it!)
…that’s all I have! Must try harder!

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