What annoys you about someone that has no effect on you whatsoever but still irritates the hell out of you.

[gettingolderandgrumpier]

a colleague will not put her phone on silent ( in case of emergency) but will leave in her bag and every times it rings and it’s often a cold call she will leap in the air in panic to turn the phone off .
I’ve said leave it on vibrate , leave it on your desk so you can turn it off quicker but no . She never answers it and grumbles that it’s cold calls .
I’m not bothered about the phone ringing but this leaping up in panic and a mad scramble for her phone makes me want to hit her with her daft phone .
why not leave on your desk or stop panicking every time it rings I don’t get it .
i know it has no effect on my life but I’m worried she may have a panic induced heart attack ( I’m joking ) .
share with me lighthearted irritations that you have.

I can't stand people who spend ages at supermarket checkouts rummaging in their bags/wallets for cash/card or loyalty tags, as if they didn't know they had to pay.
Hate them.

Hell is other people.

Some already mentioned but I completely agree with
•people who pronounce ask as arks, tv or real life, it makes me shudder
•the time running out on the chase before they press the buzzer to answer
•people who don't open their curtains in the day time
•the pouting lip selfies people still seem to think are a good idea
No idea why these things irritate the fuck out of me as it's not my concern but they just do.

This one's really none of my business at all and doesn't affect me one bit but still annoys me. We live in a lovely friendly village, but not cliquey or weird - a great mix of people from all over (all walks of life) and large enough to offer a range of amenities including (for young families) 2 good state primary schools, 2 private day nurseries, a nursery school and a playgroup. We're on a road really near one of the primaries and in the mornings all the kids from the street walk down to school and all know each other. Except one family who moved here from a large city half an hour away and the mum insisted on driving their DC back to the city for nursery for a whole pre school year (for both DC so this lasted about 3 years) and now drives them to another (state) school outside the village. Didn't even visit the two village schools. I am always friendly to them when I do see them but they are hardly around. Why move to a village with a lovely community if you're going to spend no time in it? As I say, nothing to do with me, but it irrationally annoys me.

Companies that email you with your first name 'Hi Monsun!' like you're friends or require you to submit a 'Selfie' (you know, for security reasons)! Feels creepy and unprofessional (and immature).
Ppl that whistle.

@LilylilyDaisy you are completely wrong as @GoldenCupidon says.

It is gardening leave for exactly that reason. You are gardening precisely because you can't work else where and you can't go on holiday. You are notionally still an employee but can't do anything other than be at home and potter around in the garden.

Lots and lots of references in employment tribunal and Court of Appeal cases. For example:

https://www.bailii.org/cgi-bin/format.cgi?doc=

From January 1996, after completing the project, he was allowed to stay at home on "gardening leave" and his employment duly terminated at the end of April, when he was aged 51.

www.bailii.org/cgi-bin/format.cgi?doc=/uk/cases/UKEAT/1997/1262_97_0212.html

The Appellant now raises the point that the manner of dismissal was by notice given in a letter of 27 February and that gave one month's notice. It is argued, therefore, that under s.97(1)(a) of the Employment Rights Act, the effective date of termination is the end of the period of notice even if the employer sends the employee on gardening leave. That point was not taken by Mr Qassim before the Industrial Tribunal.

I ask her all the time because it drives me insane!! She says, and I quote, "I don't realise I'm doing it, I can't help it".
I've even tried buying her lip balms incase she just enjoys the extra moisture but they end up at the bottom of a bag or lost in the car within a day or two 🤦🏽‍♀️

😂😂😂 touché!

My MIL doesn't wear any socks with boots and it gives me the ick, she also sometimes comes into my house, takes her boots off, sits on my sofa and puts her bare feet on my coffee table...with yellow unpainted toenails. Literally makes me go funny. Like where is your social etiquette, I don't walk into your house and rub my bare arse on your sofa so why are your crusty feet all over my table!?

Overly organised people annoy me, like a friend will message me to see about meeting up in a week's time and I'll reply with 'sure that sounds nice' then next minute they're like when/where/ what shall we do/ they want to finalise every single detail now. Depending on what I reply that then kicks off a whole new set of questions or deliberations about whether we can do that time cos of nap times etc. I'm a decide the day before kinda girl, I wanna see what the weather's saying and how sociable I feel 😂

People who meet up at a cafe and don't want to order food, 'I'll just have a decaf coffee or a water' ...like the food is literally why I came. I'm ordering, sit and watch me eat pancakes ! (I do offer to treat them incase it's because of cost but usually it's because they're 'watching what they eat')

When people refer to their kids in months past the age of 1, such as my little boy is 36 months old. Your child is 3.

Really long acrylic nails, I just think they must get so dirty. How you wiping your arse with those on!?

People who say 'hope you're well' it's so impersonal and cold. Like they actually don't care how you are they just feel obliged to write it. But it's not a question it's a statement which ensures no reply and if you do reply saying you aren't well, it almost certainly follows with a 'oh no, that doesn't sound good' or obligatory sad emoticon.

Can you explain? I’m Intrigued!

My neighbour does this, except it's every time the wife goes out in the car - the husband and kids stand in the doorway - there's horn pips and they're all waving and yelling bye to each other! DEAR GOD WHY?!?!?!?

I'm a daily croc wearer everywhere

This really made me laugh

How the fuck did you pass your driving test?

If you can't control the vehicle you're driving... scary that people like you are free to be on the roads!

This is slightly niche - but at my church there is one man who uses "Lord" as punctuation whenever he prays out loud. So it goes something like "Lord, we thank you Lord, for all that you do for us Lord and we ask Lord that you will be with us Lord this week and Lord that you comfort those Lord that are suffering Lord ..."

His record is 34 Lords in one prayer. I can't help but count when he starts now 🫢

Upspeak, making statements into questions. Going up at the end of a sentence. So eg ‘I like baking’, a statement, becomes a question with a rising inflection towards the end. Written upspeak ; eg ‘But Paris isn’t in Belgium?’. You know it isn’t, you are making a statement, why turn it into a question? It’s everywhere, including here, everywhere. It irritates me. Look, you can ask a question with no rising inflection at all: have you got your keys; are we taking your car. The question is implicit in the sentence structure. Why turn statements into questions?

People who eat with their mouths open. Noisy sucky squelchy eaters - 🤑
Soles of shoes on chairs / tables.
Poor hand hygiene.

Colleague who prefaces everything he says with 'can I ask?' and then ends his goodbye at the end of the day with a 'stay safe'.

When people make a high pitched whistle sort of sound when they say any word with an S in

But that does have an impact on you - not what op asked.

A work colleague (who is annoying in many and numerous ways) twiddles her hair constantly. Once I'd seen it I can't unsee it and I spend a deal of my shift now with my teeth on edge 😬

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

This thread has made my night (I don’t get out much) - so funny love it!

Have you tried 'Why?'

But she's making waste. Do you have to have this volunteer?