Everyday sexism in the home - any resources

[Alwayssupportingdifference]

I think that some form of sexism has crept into our home and our culture. I just wondered if anybody knows of any resources that can help us to deal with this.

I am the only female in the house and am experiencing things like the men / boys telling me to speed up my conversation, telling me when a conversation should end (when they feel it should), automatically siding with each other just because (without knowing any of the facts).

I don't really know what this is called. I think toxic masculinity, misogyny is too strong a term. I need my husband to better model behaviour towards women. He himself had a very sexist father who treated his mother poorly so has not grown up with good modelling himself.

They all absolutely refute this is the case, but I feel it is so embedded that they cannot see it themselves.

I want our sons to treat future girlfriends better than this and I want to be an equal in the home myself.

My husband has a very professional position and has been involved in training in the workplace over the years. I don't think he can see this in the home though.

Any advice?

No, but I feel for you. It sounds awful!

Telling me to end a conversation) ir shut up?!)

What did you just say to me ?

Challenge each and every time

But ;

How old are the boys ?

How do yoour husband and boys contribute to the running of the household?

Do you work outside the home ?

I most definitely would not be happy being told when to stop talking.

It needs to be called out every single time. With labelling the behaviour for what it is: misogyny.

How old are your boys?

I feel you are minimising, I would be really angry if this was happening in my house.

Have you tried telling your 'D'H he is behaving like a sexist bastard? What does he say?

I'd actually look at non violent conversation and assert your self. Pull them up on it and point it out.

Thanks for the replies so far, reading them has been very helpful.

I do work outside the home, but I didn't for a long time while bringing children up in the early years. My husband is a good man but just does not see this and claims it is not sexism. He runs a large team, including a lot of women and would not behave like this in the workplace. I do challenge each and every time, believe me I do, but it just causes a lot of confrontation and arguments in the home. I think they think it is all in my head.

Invisible Women is a brilliant book which deals with the issue of women being silently erased by patriarchal structures. It's thoroughly readable (not heavy going academic theory, though the 'data bias' bit suggests it might be) and so interesting. And it's 99p on kindle today! If you share some of the examples of how these small, 'harmless' comments and assumptions accumulate and the effect they have on women in the real world, hopefully the males in your family will become more aware of misogyny and their own role in perpetuating it.

www.amazon.co.uk/Invisible-Women-Exposing-World-Designed-ebook/dp/B07CQ2NZG6/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2KYN3BBP6F9C6&keywords=invisible+women&qid=1678282320&sprefix=invisible+women%2Caps%2C208&sr=8-1

I'd also hugely recommend Caroline Criado-Perez's newsletter too, which arrives weekly (roughly) and is full of fury-inducing facts while also being very funny.

I'd start with assertiveness training for yourself - A Woman In Your Own Right by Anne Dickson is only a couple of pounds on Amazon.

Awful. Absolutely awful.

There's nothing awful about using assertiveness to give yourself a boost when you are being undermined by your own family.

Your best resource is your mouth, op!

He may well behave like this in the workplace - a lot of men do!!

Non violent communication.

When you interrupt me and tell me to hurry up, I feel annoyed because I need you to respect me and you can demonstrate this by letting me finish. Can you do that?

He's diminishing you.

www.talkingwise.com/

Equality in conversation underpins equality in relationships.