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Original poster

Anyone else got a DH who is rubbish at DIY

56 replies

soupmaker · 06/03/2023 22:02

DH is an electrician to trade. He's got tools galore. He works in a clinical environment where work has to be exact, clean and up to standard.

So why the actual fuck can he not even seal the bath without making a complete hash of it. It's a bloody mess. Silicone all over taps, looks like our 9 year old has done it. He didn't fill the bath with water or use masking tape. He didn't even scrape off all the discoloured old sealant. FFS.

I'm shit at DIY and think I'd have done a better job.

OP posts:

Topseyt123 · 07/03/2023 00:46

Dacadactyl · 06/03/2023 22:13

My husband isn't handy at all. It's been quite an adjustment for me actually. My dad is extremely handy and only ever pays professionals when he absolutely has to (because it'd be illegal if he tried to do the wiring or whatever). If it wasn't illegal, my dad would learn how to do whatever it was himself.

I have struggled with DH over the years cos I just think "my dad would know how to do that", but then not everyone's the same.

But I grew up thinking all men were shit hot at DIY, which is not the case!

Same for me. I grew up with a Dad who was extremely practical and could turn his hand to a lot of DIY jobs. He did also recognise his limitations when necessary and so would occasionally get people in. I thought that this level of being practical was just how men were, in my childish mind.

My DH is the total opposite. Not at all practical and with a tendency to bodge things. He doesn't want to believe that though. Thinks he needs to prove himself as a Mr. Practical and absolutely doesn't recognise that he has any limitations until the job has gone horribly wrong. I have to get someone in to sort out the mess.

I am a practical thinker and can often think through how something should be done. I have a very unsteady hand though, poor balance (so ladders of any real height are a no-no) and an old right arm injury that has never fully resolved itself and causes difficulty. So I can see much of what should be done, but I recognise my limitations though and know I can't do it. I wish I could do more.

DH frustrates me in that he would rather bodge and damage things than admit that he should call a tradesperson in until it is much too late. In the last fortnight I have had to get a plumber in to fit a new toilet after he broke the cistern and it began leaking.

We also needed a new plug socket on a wall of our kitchen. Thankfully DH did agree that we needed a professional in to do that. I'd been ready to put my foot down though.

It sounds awful, I'm aware of that. But I know that I wouldn't be able to do many DIY jobs other than painting. DH isn't Mr. Practical either but just proceeds to make a bodge which then has to be sorted out.

SamanthaCaine · 07/03/2023 00:53

soupmaker · 06/03/2023 22:40

All I did was a quick google search of how to seal a bath @LesserBohemians it didn't cross my mind that DH wouldn't do likewise and follow the instructions.

If life was that easy, we'd all watch YouTube videos and be brilliant at everything. But sadly life isn't like that.

Sealing a bath looks easy when you watch experts do it. A bit like plastering. It looks a cinch but is bloody hard to get right. It's definitely worth screwing two bits of wood together and then trying it yourself with just your finger. It definitely makes you appreciate the difficulty and skill involved.

I can seal a bath nowadays but I have to use a tool nowadays and take my time. Prior to that, I've spent years making a complete mess and cursing.

Give him a break. Being an electrician means very little as it's a different skillset. Unless he's deliberately doing a bad job, then it's likely to be frustrating for him too.

OrderOfTheKookaburra · 07/03/2023 01:03

Weird arse comments on this thread. Most tradies ARE good at DIY ffs. Your DH is just being a lazy fucker.

My ex used to think he was brilliant at DIY but was absolutely crap at it. I would have to start and finish a job while he was out otherwise he would ignore it forever, but then see me start it and then forcefully take over. I got so fed up with it I told him to piss off one time and the affront to his make dignity was just too much for him to handle.

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Whydoievenbother · 07/03/2023 01:04

Mine. And he's an Engineer so go figure. I think mine is more that he lacks the inclination, rather than the skill. I now regret that I didn't marry someone more 'handy' our place is starting to look like a tip (I do all the cooking etc before anyone says I'm sexist)

Btjdkfnn · 07/03/2023 01:15

My DH is shit at DIY, but he is well aware of it and therefore doesn't do it. Either I will do it, or if it is beyond me, I will pay someone to do it. Sounds like you need to pay someone to sort the bath!

pinkyvase · 07/03/2023 01:18

Dacadactyl · 06/03/2023 22:13

I have struggled with DH over the years cos I just think "my dad would know how to do that", but then not everyone's the same.

But I grew up thinking all men were shit hot at DIY, which is not the case!

Are you me? My dad/dh are both exactly as you described. One saving grace is that dh is always keen to learn from my dad and likes to get involved and learn from him when he comes to do/fix stuff, but realizing men just don't 'do' effortless diy was a short short shock when we moved in together 😂 I've done a better job than my husband on many things via YouTube when my dad is not available.

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