I feel like I'm in a big mess and I've no idea where to start or how to address it all.
I did years ago get diagnosed with a general anxiety disorder but haven't had any treatment for it. Im not sure if this is a symptom of that?
I just have no interest in anything, I get by, go to work, do what I need to for DD but nothing outside of that. She's 2 and we're lucky we have help with her when needed. I don't have any family or close friends near to where I live.
All I seem to do is watch tv or scroll on my phone, my brain doesn't ever switch off and there's so much going on it that all I want to do is sleep. I've gained huge amounts of weight in the last few years but can't seem to do anything about it. I know I don't eat that well but I don't seem to like any healthy foods and I've tried various exercise types but don't enjoy any of them. If someone asks me what I want to do with an evening or weekend I go blank. I'd happily hide in bed all day. I don't cook, I don't clean, I don't go food shopping (I'll order in) if I do anything socially I feel like it takes me days if not longer to recover. It's just a never ending cycle of me being exhausted, going to work and being a bit fed up, not wanting to do anything. A friend came to visit for 4 days recently and by the end I felt like I needed a week off work to recover from the things we did when she was here.
I just don't know how to reset. Do I go to a dr? What kind? Therapy? For what? Am I just lazy or apathetic? I'm 36 but feel like life is over a bit.
I don't want my DD to grow up thinking I'm useless and for her I do stuff (take her to messy play classes, set up play dates and activists, she eats really well) but just can't seem to for me.