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Can a Catholic be buried in a C of E cemetery ?

34 replies

DustyLee123 · 04/03/2023 15:16

My DH is christened Catholic and went to Catholic schools. He now has no interest in the faith, and our kids are christened C of E, like me. He does however take the wafer at a Catholic funeral, as he feels the pressure to do it. (Not the wine due to germs)
So my question is if he would be permitted to be buried in our local C of E cemetery, as I know I wouldn’t be allowed in the Catholic one.

OP posts:
fajitaaaa · 04/03/2023 15:23

Ask the church - they'll know. He shouldn't fake the wafer eating though. That's worse than not eating it.

Ellmau · 04/03/2023 15:24

If your local churchyard is still open to burials (lots are closed due to being full), then yes if you live in the parish:

www.churchofengland.org/resources/churchcare/advice-and-guidance-church-buildings/new-burials-and-memorials

DustyLee123 · 04/03/2023 15:26

fajitaaaa · 04/03/2023 15:23

Ask the church - they'll know. He shouldn't fake the wafer eating though. That's worse than not eating it.

He takes it and eats it, he just refuses to share a cup with others.

OP posts:
DustyLee123 · 04/03/2023 15:27

Ellmau · 04/03/2023 15:24

If your local churchyard is still open to burials (lots are closed due to being full), then yes if you live in the parish:

www.churchofengland.org/resources/churchcare/advice-and-guidance-church-buildings/new-burials-and-memorials

Thanks, we do live in the parish.

OP posts:
Luredbyapomegranate · 04/03/2023 15:28

Yes. You just need to be of the parish. In fact you don’t even need to be that in some cases.

fajitaaaa · 04/03/2023 15:48

DustyLee123 · 04/03/2023 15:26

He takes it and eats it, he just refuses to share a cup with others.

He only takes it as he's pressured to though

PauliesWalnuts · 04/03/2023 15:58

Don’t know about C of E but going the other way, my mum was buried in the Catholic section of our local cemetery. Me, my dad and sibling are catholic and we bought a multi-plot so a couple of us could go in with her - my dad did, and a still born child of my brother’s. I don’t think it was even questioned.

upinaballoon · 04/03/2023 16:06

The C of E might have different rules at different times because of different archdeacons and vicars and whether the space is taken up for bodies or ashes, and diocesan policies and so on. Best to ask.
Good old, tolerant old, C of E, sharing the cup until Aids came and it was ok to dip the wafer in the wine.
Alan Bennet said he used to be afraid he'd catch VD when he took communion in Leeds, from the chalice. This is when he was young.

I wonder what pressure it is that makes your husband go to receive.

DustyLee123 · 04/03/2023 16:26

I suppose he felt he should because that’s what catholics do at a mass 🤷🏼‍♀️ I’ve only known him do it twice in over 30 years, at family funerals.
I know that he is no fan of the Catholic faith now.

OP posts:
KnittedCardi · 04/03/2023 16:31

Yeah, my non- believing Catholic DM, and her CofE husband are buried next to each other in the local village cemetery. It's a very relaxed one though, lots of funky plots!

ReadersD1gest · 04/03/2023 16:32

fajitaaaa · 04/03/2023 15:48

He only takes it as he's pressured to though

There's no pressure to take communion.

fajitaaaa · 04/03/2023 16:47

ReadersD1gest · 04/03/2023 16:32

There's no pressure to take communion.

He does however take the wafer at a Catholic funeral, as he feels the pressure to do it OP says there is

ReadersD1gest · 04/03/2023 16:48

fajitaaaa · 04/03/2023 16:47

He does however take the wafer at a Catholic funeral, as he feels the pressure to do it OP says there is

Pressure from whom? Not from the church.

Topseyt123 · 04/03/2023 16:55

You only have to live in the parish I think, and there may be a few exceptions to that. Space is often at a premium though, as graveyards are filling up.

Something tells me that it probably won't even be checked on, though that might depend on where you live. If you want the funeral service to be in your local parish church (of whichever denomination) then the funeral director can arrange it.

Viviennemary · 04/03/2023 16:59

Your DH seems to have a very strange idea of what going to communion means. Not everyone at mass takes communion.

fajitaaaa · 04/03/2023 17:29

ReadersD1gest · 04/03/2023 16:48

Pressure from whom? Not from the church.

I dunno I just assumed OP knew what she was on about as she's in the situation

DustyLee123 · 04/03/2023 21:37

Viviennemary · 04/03/2023 16:59

Your DH seems to have a very strange idea of what going to communion means. Not everyone at mass takes communion.

My DH hasn’t given an opinion on MN of it, it’s my observation.

OP posts:
Toddlerteaplease · 04/03/2023 21:40

He should not take it at all if he doesn't believe, that is disrespectful to those that do. Communion under both kinds has been suspended since covid.

Christmascaroll · 04/03/2023 21:52

Toddlerteaplease · 04/03/2023 21:40

He should not take it at all if he doesn't believe, that is disrespectful to those that do. Communion under both kinds has been suspended since covid.

Nobody has wine except the priest since March 2020 in Catholic churches.
However in a CofE churches I have seen wine offered in some churches since at least September 2022

Toddlerteaplease · 04/03/2023 21:53

@Christmascaroll it's being reintroduced in RC church's from Maundy Thursday this year.

Christmascaroll · 04/03/2023 21:55

Toddlerteaplease · 04/03/2023 21:53

@Christmascaroll it's being reintroduced in RC church's from Maundy Thursday this year.

Oh thank you

user1496146479 · 04/03/2023 21:56

I've never seen the wine shared with anyone apart from the priest & Eucharist ministers! Mid forties semi lapsed Catholic!

Toddlerteaplease · 04/03/2023 21:57

Though it will be up to individual churches, when they actually start again. As they may not jade enough ministers anymore.

gogohmm · 04/03/2023 22:01

You need to live in the parish but most yards are actually closed unless you are "adding" to an existing plot. There's sometimes additional criteria such as minimum time in the parish

gogohmm · 04/03/2023 22:03

@Toddlerteaplease no we've been taking the cup a few weeks and dipping since 2021.