My boss wants a one to one over lunch, is this bad news?

[Concestor]

I do a part time job based at home mostly, where I work pretty independently. My boss has always said she's really happy with me but I've noticed since Christmas that I haven't been getting the usual meeting links I used to.

Boss has been really busy and not really replying to emails due to some urgent issues she's had to deal with (not just me, no one is ready getting replies) so I mentioned it to a colleague and they were unusually vague - "oh I think the new series of links haven't been set up" but I know these meetings have to happen regularly so I can't believe they aren't being held.

Am I right to think that this lunch is going to be me getting my matching orders?

I'm gutted if so, I love this job and I just have up another job I do to ensure I have time available for this one.

There's no date set for the lunch and now I just feel really anxious and worried.

What could I do proactively to find out what's going on? We have a team day soon so we will all be together to plan next year's workplan.

I had to drive 100 miles to a hotel to be fired in November I was fuming

I wouldn't attend a meeting in my lunch hour. Its my time and unpaid.

She isn't slipping, she was ill and then we've had some really urgent stuff she's had to do. She's amazing at her job, I really hope she's not leaving!

I'm so sorry to hear that, it's a horrible thing to do to someone.

It would be paid, it's a meeting.

99 times out of a 100, these meetings that we get all worked up about are absolutely nothing.

The 1 time it is not, you just have to be prepared to argue your position, take whatever criticism that is given that is fair, and correct any that is accurate. Make a plan to move forward. Then go home and rant and grouse and let out all the stress that you didn’t show to your boss.

It's hard not to let your anxiety run away with itself, especially when you've been fired at a lunch meeting before. But it all likelihood it's not going to happen again. I know it's taken me a long time to get over how I was treated.

Try and keep calm. I hope this all gets sorted quickly and that there's a really positive outcome for you.

You are in a horrible position and if you have your suspicions (ok does sound odd what is going on) make sure you have everything you need, snd remove any trace of personal data etc in your account. Have a copy of payslips etc..

just be sure IF your worse suspicions are realised you have your back covered.

Use the team planning day to ask about the links to the usual meetings. To be honest, if they were going to get rid of you, its unlikely that they'd want you at a team planning day so take it as a good sight that you're going to that.

Well you could just ring her up and ask.
It used to be a thing, talking to people in real life.
I'm not being arsey, honestly I am just bemused that there's so much miscommunication these days that could often be easily resolved.

Small company OP?

I can see why you’re stressed. Perhaps ring rather than email. Explain that you’re feeling unsettled, and why.

fwiw I think that it’s unlikely that she is planning to sack you over lunch after a team planning day and that all your colleagues are in on it. That seems a tad far-fetched.

Op how long have been there and how are your performance reviews?

Betting you’ve a career that would make us all swoon . Not.

Did you say you work in a school?

If so, v unlikely be sacked over lunch. They have processes to follow I'm sure.

How long have you been there?

If you are poss being made redundant and your colleagues know then that's bad.

If you were about to be fired then I’m sure a date would have been arranged rather than a meet for lunch at some point.

This is the sort of thing I’d get myself stressed about, I can’t stand the not knowing.

I really wish managers would give you a clue or say it's nothing to worry about when they ask for a meeting, they must realise that people worry about redundancy or that they've done something wrong.
I hope it's nothing awful Op xx

No actually. A public body. But this bit is small.

I've been there about 18 months and I've never had a performance review, but always had good informal feedback. I know I'm probably being silly. I think I just needed to talk about it and DH just grunts at me.

OK that's useful. You probably have more backup than I did. My employer tried this, and when I walked in uttered "don't get yourself too settled" after asking me to sit down, they were truing to rattle me into not asking for a long overdue payrise. I may or may not have given them what for 😊but I'm a very confident person. I understand that's not a strategy for everyone!

If you have procedures that protect you such as performance reviews and appraisals, just say that you would like your work reviewed that way and not in an informal setting in future.

Can’t you just look in her calendar and other colleagues calendars to see if any meetings are happening without you?

I don't have access to anyone else's calendar. Is that normal to have that?

On outlook you just add other people’s calendars. It’s how we see where people are, if they’re off or out and when people are free when we arrange meetings. I can’t imagine not being able to see where colleagues are!

No we don't do that. We just ask each other when's a good time to meet.

You don't have to do that for it to work. It is just normal Outlook functionality.

Does your office use outlook to book meetings in people's calendars? How do you get notice of meetings called by someone else?

Are you the only one doing your role?