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Original poster

When to chase up email response from teacher?

21 replies

polkadotpolkadotspolka · 02/03/2023 21:10

Dd (9) is suspected to be autistic. I've raised my concerns with school and spoke to dd's teacher on the phone. They asked me to send them an email outlining my concerns and they would speak to the SENCO but it wouldn't be until after half term as they were just about to break up for the holidays.

I emailed two weeks ago on 15th Feb while it was half term, so they have been back at school since the 20th. I've not heard anything back yet but I'm not sure how long is a reasonable time to wait before chasing it up? I know they are really busy so don't want to seem pushy, but equally would like to know if any progress has been made.

OP posts:
cansu · 02/03/2023 21:13

Just phone and ask to speak to the senco.

pinksquash13 · 02/03/2023 21:16

I think now would be fine to enquire if the senco has been spoken to.

Jas5mum · 02/03/2023 21:18

I'd go to the school office and ask to speak to the senco.

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bonjello · 02/03/2023 21:21

Email back and say you're wondering when they'll be able to update you on this.

Springisclose · 02/03/2023 21:23

It’s ok to be pushy in matters like this. A reasonable wait is 1 weeks. Squeaky wheels get more results.
Can you ask for an assessment via the Gp?

Original poster
polkadotpolkadotspolka · 02/03/2023 21:40

Thanks everyone!

I've not approached GP yet as I wanted to see what school thought about it. She's a typical high masking girl and to be honest, I'm worried the GP won't take me seriously. I have a very long list of traits she shows, but it's not obvious at all unless you really know her. I'm not expecting any support from school apart from maybe small allowances eg, somewhere quiet for her to go if she needs it, so do you think it's worth just going straight to my GP about it? I've started saving to get her assessed privately as I know the NHS wait is very long, but it's quite out of reach money-wise for me so will take a while.

OP posts:
SimplySipping · 02/03/2023 21:55

A polite email chase would be fine. Attach your original so it's easy for them to get to.

SimplySipping · 02/03/2023 22:00

I wouldn't wait on school though, they don't know your child like you do.

When we kicked off an assessment the GP refused to refer saying school does it, and school refused to saying GP does it. It's just annoying, on paper either or them could have. I ended up doing it myself.

Witchytwitchybitchy · 02/03/2023 22:10

Go directly to SENCO. Forward her the email.

Original poster
polkadotpolkadotspolka · 02/03/2023 22:35

SimplySipping · 02/03/2023 22:00

I wouldn't wait on school though, they don't know your child like you do.

When we kicked off an assessment the GP refused to refer saying school does it, and school refused to saying GP does it. It's just annoying, on paper either or them could have. I ended up doing it myself.

That is appalling! To be completely honest, I'm not 100% on what the process is, and thought school may be able to guide us on what to do next...

OP posts:
Cornelious2011 · 02/03/2023 22:57

What's the process for referral in your area?

Original poster
polkadotpolkadotspolka · 02/03/2023 22:57

Cornelious2011 · 02/03/2023 22:57

What's the process for referral in your area?

I'm unsure - how would I find that out? This is what I was hoping the SENCO could advise me on.

OP posts:
Original poster
polkadotpolkadotspolka · 02/03/2023 23:02

Sorry I've just googled for our area (Bradford District) and it says aged 7+, schools can make a direct referral to CAHMS.

OP posts:
JessicaBrassica · 03/03/2023 07:21

If your daughter masks, don't be surprised if school say they don't see any of the traits you see. If your sendco is good, they will acknowledge this.

There are still schools/teachers who are inexperienced/living in the dark ages who will tell you that they don't have a problem in school so it must be an issue at home. You don't need to accept this. You are the expert in your daughter and if you are concerned then you are right that there is something going on.
Also, if you can wait, I'd get her assessed by nhs. There are some unscrupulous private assessors out there who will give you what you pay for. Private assessments are therefore not always given the same weight as NHS diagnoses

OldChinaJug · 03/03/2023 07:53

I'm a teacher. I'd say make a face to face appointment with the sendco.

It's not that they've forgotten or don't care or are being a bit lax but the system is broken and the SEND team are overwhelmed. They have to prioritise somewhere and, unfortunately, it's the parents who just wait for the system to work who get left behind simply because the parents who are constantly in touch are bumped to the top of the pile.

It's not right and it's not fair but there are only so many hours in the day and, if you know someone is coming in for a meeting at 10am tomorrow, you're not going to tell yourself you'll get round to it the day after (only for someone else to have requested a face to face meeting and have their case bumped ahead).

The teacher may well have alerted the sendco already - it's easy to forward an email but I often go for days without seeing our sendco and, when I do, It might be because I have a more pressing matter at the time (usually a child who has trashed a classroom, put themselves or others at risk or attacked someone) and wouldn't remember to mention it in the midst of all that.

Original poster
polkadotpolkadotspolka · 03/03/2023 08:03

JessicaBrassica · 03/03/2023 07:21

If your daughter masks, don't be surprised if school say they don't see any of the traits you see. If your sendco is good, they will acknowledge this.

There are still schools/teachers who are inexperienced/living in the dark ages who will tell you that they don't have a problem in school so it must be an issue at home. You don't need to accept this. You are the expert in your daughter and if you are concerned then you are right that there is something going on.
Also, if you can wait, I'd get her assessed by nhs. There are some unscrupulous private assessors out there who will give you what you pay for. Private assessments are therefore not always given the same weight as NHS diagnoses

Thank you, I've been in touch with the Lorna Wing Centre who are specialists in girls with autism. I'm also very wary of rubbish private assessment so have done lots of research. But I'll still pursue NHS route anyway as it might be out of reach for me financially anyway (currently £2950 for assessment). Appreciate the help, thanks Smile

OP posts:
Original poster
polkadotpolkadotspolka · 03/03/2023 08:03

OldChinaJug · 03/03/2023 07:53

I'm a teacher. I'd say make a face to face appointment with the sendco.

It's not that they've forgotten or don't care or are being a bit lax but the system is broken and the SEND team are overwhelmed. They have to prioritise somewhere and, unfortunately, it's the parents who just wait for the system to work who get left behind simply because the parents who are constantly in touch are bumped to the top of the pile.

It's not right and it's not fair but there are only so many hours in the day and, if you know someone is coming in for a meeting at 10am tomorrow, you're not going to tell yourself you'll get round to it the day after (only for someone else to have requested a face to face meeting and have their case bumped ahead).

The teacher may well have alerted the sendco already - it's easy to forward an email but I often go for days without seeing our sendco and, when I do, It might be because I have a more pressing matter at the time (usually a child who has trashed a classroom, put themselves or others at risk or attacked someone) and wouldn't remember to mention it in the midst of all that.

Thanks for this - I didn't realise I could schedule to speak to the SENCO directly myself so I'll contact the school office and request it.

OP posts:
Usernamesarenoteasy · 03/03/2023 09:22

I am 99% certain my teen is autistic. I self referred to CAMHS, who although haven't really helped with some of the issues, did make a referral for an asd assessment. However, I've been told the NHS waiting time for an assessment is around 18 months. I have booked a private assessment, which still has a 7 month wait. This should cost me around £1500, but they will only see you and assess if you already have the NHS referral.
Hopefully your senco will be able to help, my terns schools has been horrific, and took nearly 2 months to fill out and return the questionnaire needed for the NHS referral!

SimplySipping · 03/03/2023 13:30

It's worth flagging up that a diagnosis doesn't change as much as you'd think. Schools have an obligation to try to meet need irrespective of diagnosis. When you don't have a diagnosis it can feel like everything is on hold until you get one, like you're waiting for "permission" or some sort of extra funding, but those things basically don't exist. A diagnosis, in our experience, also didn't come with much more specific guidance on support than you'd get from a book or website of generic suggestions.

Get used to using phrases "waiting assessment for autism" and "suspected autism" and crack on with asking for whatever accommodations you think she needs. It's not instead of a diagnosis, but alongside it. Don't wait on a diagnosis, even though it feels like you somehow should.

Original poster
polkadotpolkadotspolka · 03/03/2023 17:26

SimplySipping · 03/03/2023 13:30

It's worth flagging up that a diagnosis doesn't change as much as you'd think. Schools have an obligation to try to meet need irrespective of diagnosis. When you don't have a diagnosis it can feel like everything is on hold until you get one, like you're waiting for "permission" or some sort of extra funding, but those things basically don't exist. A diagnosis, in our experience, also didn't come with much more specific guidance on support than you'd get from a book or website of generic suggestions.

Get used to using phrases "waiting assessment for autism" and "suspected autism" and crack on with asking for whatever accommodations you think she needs. It's not instead of a diagnosis, but alongside it. Don't wait on a diagnosis, even though it feels like you somehow should.

Yes absolutely. I had a thread on here a couple of months back when I was first thinking about raising it with school and had loads of great advice, including what you've just outlined here. I've already started saying waiting assessment for autism (I wrote it on her consent form for her residential trip earlier today for the first time!).

I'm just hoping it maybe changes their attitude towards certain things, like a teaching assistant telling her to 'grow up' when she was distressed and crying about the noise of the fire alarm Angry Not expecting much more than that though! I have friends with children who have severe struggles with autism and they get naff all support.

OP posts:
LlynTegid · 03/03/2023 17:51

Talk face to face. I think it makes your concerns appear more important.

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