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Original poster

Will I regret downsizing so much?

78 replies

SpyouttheLand · 02/03/2023 07:40

I have a large 4 bed detached house with a big garden. I've never loved it but it gave us lots of space when DC were young, which was a particularly godsend during lockdown when we had 3 adults wfh and one on furlough! I find the responsibility of owning and mainyaining a large home quite stressful. There's always something that needs doing and finding tradesmen etc is hard work!

Tbh I've often longed for a small but perfectly formed home just for me without all the people getting on my nerves. Be careful what you wish for because in the last 2 years I've gone from a houseful to just me. Last DC moves out on Monday.

I've seen a very expensive new build bungalow. It's about a mile from here but also a whole other world. Still on bus links and close ish to amenities but also quite rural, much nicer area and spot.

It will cost about the same as my house and is basically one large room with kitchen, living room, dining, bifold doors to a small but beautifully done garden with large patio, plus a nice bathroom and 2 good double bedrooms. Driveway for 2 cars but no garage.

It seems perfect for me, but I'm going to have to get rid of so much stuff, leave the place where DC grew up (and DH died). Also not much space if GC come along...

OP posts:
NowAAT · 02/03/2023 10:06

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 02/03/2023 09:22

Oh I'd go for it in that case, if you don't need to release cash. Also I'm a bit Hmm about the poster uptrend who referenced someone who then upsized just to have space for holidaying relatives - what are airbnbs or premier inns for?? No way would I keep an excessively large house just for my adult dc who have lives elsewhere in the country to come sleep once or twice a year!

I was thinking the same! Not everyone wants to be inviting family to come lodge in their house you know!!!

Go for it OP. It sounds like a lovely bungalow and if it's gonna make you happy and less stress to maintain, just do it x

Original poster
SpyouttheLand · 02/03/2023 10:10

It's not really rural, it just has a rural feel. It's 1 mile from the hospital and the station, it's just on the edge of town on the side that hasn't expanded outwards because of a nature reserve. So on one side of the house is nature reserve, in other directions there are local shops, dentist, doctor all within less than a mile, with the main bus route to the hospital and town centre a few hundred yards at the end of the road. Actually when you see that written down you can see why it's expensive!

OP posts:
Chewbecca · 02/03/2023 10:22

It sounds perfect to me. More manageable for you on your own, nicer location plus enough space to entertain still if needed.
A simpler, modern home is quite appealing to me without all the clutter.

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 02/03/2023 10:24

SpyouttheLand · 02/03/2023 10:10

It's not really rural, it just has a rural feel. It's 1 mile from the hospital and the station, it's just on the edge of town on the side that hasn't expanded outwards because of a nature reserve. So on one side of the house is nature reserve, in other directions there are local shops, dentist, doctor all within less than a mile, with the main bus route to the hospital and town centre a few hundred yards at the end of the road. Actually when you see that written down you can see why it's expensive!

Wow, that sounds wonderful.

Is there room in the garden for a shed?

OldTinHat · 02/03/2023 10:24

From someone who did the same when DC left home, I say go for it! I certainly haven't looked back from downsizing. Less cleaning and upkeep, smaller bills and it's 'mine' iyswim. And I'd been in my previous house 20ys and my youngest was born in his bedroom!

Original poster
SpyouttheLand · 02/03/2023 10:26

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 02/03/2023 10:24

Wow, that sounds wonderful.

Is there room in the garden for a shed?

Show quote history

Yes, they've actually built a base for a shed and even run power to it, but no shed. Not sure how big though..

OP posts:
junebirthdaygirl · 02/03/2023 10:27

Go for it. I was concerned it was rural but it sounds like a perfect location. It will be an exciting project for you. Also as the dc are local it will work for big family dinners where they all can go home afterwards.
Speaking of bikes you are going to have to be rutruthless here and really be intentional in getting rid of stuff.

Nosandwichfilling · 02/03/2023 10:36

My sister was widowed and had a large 3 bed house. The sitting room plus extension was huge downstairs and a nightmare to heat, it was probably 40 by 30 feet sort of size. It was semi rural,

She lived there alone for 18 months and then made the decision to sell. It was very hard because she had decades of memories in that house plus like you she had raised her children and grandchildren in that house. She moved to a 2 bed bungalow with a small garden, detached with garage and drive. It was really expensive looking at it from only a space perspective. She has put her heart and soul having it exactly as she wants it.

She has no regrets, she still has all the memories in her head and now another family make use of that huge amount of space. It did free up some equity but not as much as you would think. Again it’s the shortage of bungalows.

My Aunt remained in her huge 6 bed house my Mother downsized from a 4 bed to a 1 bed bungalow. My Aunts later years were utterly dire, so expensive to run and also it felt so empty and huge I think it made her feel even lonelier.

Mischance · 02/03/2023 10:38

Go for it! I downsized to a new build when my OH died, partly to replenish my savings a bit after paying all the money for his care and partly to move back to a nearby village where we had both been happy together and I had friends.
So I now have a lovely home with no maintenance issues, lots of insulation (sound and heat), super efficient heating system - it is great!

There was a huge effort to get rid of lots of stuff - and it was slightly sad, as much of it was my OH's - but I put a lot on freecycle and many people went away with things that they were delighted with so that felt really good.

Mischance · 02/03/2023 10:40

I did a lot of caring for my OH in the old place and watched him fade away - leaving those awful memories behind was quite liberating. It left me free to hang on to the good memories before he became so ill.

Cakeandcardio · 02/03/2023 10:46

Apparently the best age to downsize is in your 60s before it all becomes too much. Sounds like you will still be able to enjoy the garden but have a lot less maintenance and live in a nicer area? What's not to love?
Decluttering will free your mind too and memories are in your head, not bricks. Good luck.

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 02/03/2023 11:09

Good on the shed because the lack of storage would be my only real concern. Where would you keep bikes, for example?

Does the garden face south?

Original poster
SpyouttheLand · 02/03/2023 11:35

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 02/03/2023 11:09

Good on the shed because the lack of storage would be my only real concern. Where would you keep bikes, for example?

Does the garden face south?

West facing garden 🙂

OP posts:
BashirWithTheGoodBeard · 02/03/2023 11:36

It sounds great!

Caspianberg · 02/03/2023 11:39

Yes just build a small/ medium shed for bikes. Something that fits x3 bikes, odd tin of paint, and garden tools doesn’t have to be massive.

and you know, decisions like this don’t have to be for life. Move, enjoy, and if in 10 years time you need something smaller or bigger or different town you can just sell again and review.

Flowersintheattic57 · 02/03/2023 12:01

The bungalow ticks so many boxes, I would go for it. Listen to some decluttering sites, someone’s technique will gel with you and then you’ll get into the groove of it. At the moment I’m watching Stacy Solomon’s show and listening to Fumio Sasaki on YouTube to power through.

DoeRayMe · 02/03/2023 12:11

That is exactly what I wish I could do. I really need a bungalow but even though I own my home I can't afford it

Go for it, a new chapter in your life

sunshinesupermum · 02/03/2023 12:16

I’m not sure how old you are but don’t leave it too late. It’s very stressful moving. Just what I'm thinking.

I'm 75 and downsized 14 years ago to a large 2 bed flat with a terrace. I have somehow accumulated a lot of stuff during those years but face the prospect of moving to sheltered accommodation at some point and dreading it.

sunshinesupermum · 02/03/2023 12:32

West facing garden 🙂 Always found those the best, especially when enjoying a glass of wine at sunset! Go for it OP.

MmedeGouge · 02/03/2023 12:44

If the base is suitable and you have spare cash could you consider a modular/ home office/ orangerie type of building rather than a shed?
You could use it for extra guests, future grandchildren etc.

The bungalow sounds ideal. If you don’t like, it it sounds like bungalows are at a premium in your area, as they are in mine, just sell it and move on.

Good luck.

Ps In my experience sons rediscover one’s usefulness once they have their own children. I have been considering emigration!😂

Travelationjubilation · 02/03/2023 13:01

My parents downsized to a more expensive house, go figure. They don't need the equity but the new house is the best thing they've ever done. Go for it

Ooompaloopa · 02/03/2023 13:40

Travelationjubilation · 02/03/2023 13:01

My parents downsized to a more expensive house, go figure. They don't need the equity but the new house is the best thing they've ever done. Go for it

My uncle and aunt did this. Sold the large 5 bed detached in Home Counties with expensive to maintain garden, high bills etc and bought a luxury new build apartment in the same small town which is large, high spec and secure to ‘lock up and leave’, underground car park, swimming pool/gym, walk to coffee shops / station. Freed up loads of time, headache and cost of maintaining - even though it still cost £1.8m.

That generation have lucked out on property and have gold standard pensions so are sitting pretty.

Wombats23 · 02/03/2023 13:50

I once swapped a 2000 sq ft flat in a city centre for a 800 sq ft semi, loved that house. Now in one that requires lots of housework & will need loads of work.

"You are not a tree, you can move" is a quote I've seen recently.

I'd be tempted by a place with all those amenities. Sounds great.

Uhave2changethings · 02/03/2023 14:00

I have this idea that I'll have adventures in a small camper van

This sounds fab!

2bazookas · 02/03/2023 14:45

Sounds great; I#d go for it.

We downsized 4 years ago and have never regretted it.

Stuff we particularly appreciate;

Old heating bill was 4 times current one
New place is so well insulated its really cosy with heating off
New place came with I full bathroomwith a bidet; plus an ensuite drive/walk in disability wetroom shower installed by previous owner. Which we had intended to change until we tried it;; its fanTASTIC. So spacious convenient comfortable and efficient..
40 yrs old but superbly designed and built; everything works, minimal maintenance . All ground floor no stairs. Great location , lovely outlook, acres of communal garden (managed for us); bus services from the back gate go direct to town/station/ hospital, dentist, Smkt and my veg allotment. We still have a car but life would be perfectly doable without one.

We now have 2 bedrooms (after 4) and find it just right, 2 guests can stay (and not share our bathroom) ; one of us can sleep apart if the other is unwell.

We came on this place quite by accident and since then have never seen anything approaching it; thatnk goodness we grabbed the opportunity.