NHS worker parents - how do you handle childcare if you’re a single parent/ both parents are nhs workers?

[Seeingred1999]

Have just begrudgingly taken an additional year off work following a years maternity leave as have been unable to source childcare for both DC. My DH works abroad so it’s me on my own the majority of the time. Prior to dc2 DH’s mum lived with us so was around to help out but she’s now moved back to her home
country.

have two DC - one in school and the other under 1 year. I work shifts 07:30-2000 but it’s roughly a 30 minute drive so would need childcare from 0645/7 - 2030/2045. No childminders in the area collect from dc1s school. How the hell do people manage? I’m absolutely devastated being unable to return to work as although I love my dc I’m just not built to be a sahp and am finding myself feeling very depressed. DH offers zero help and tbh I think he just assumed I would fall into the sahp role. How do others manage? Unfortunately no other family available to help (my mum and sister are both nurses too 🥲)

The only single parent nurses I know had a parent (kids grandparent) who picked up the slack for them and did drop off pick ups and weekend babysitting.
Others who both worked NHS worked opposite each other. Different wards who would make sure the rotas didn't clash.
You could look for Clinic work. They have better hours, start at 8 and finished by 5.
Or go onto the bank. Pick up shifts only when you know you have someone to have the kids.

I moved into community nursing and got a set days contract.

Baby sitters for wrap around almost pointless me working in the school holidays as need to pay holiday club as well as a sitter.

If family can’t help you need to change jobs to community nursing or something similar.

The only way to do it is with family help, I found. There is no childcare available at 6.30am when I leave for work/ until 9pm or whatever inconsistent time I leave a shift that supposedly finishes at 8.30/ overnight. I can now only work 2 shifts a week and am lucky that my manager agreed to set shifts, because my family are not local and have other commitments. I hate having to rely on so many different people to make it work, and DC don’t get home to even start getting ready for bed until after 9pm on my work day and have to sleep at someone else’s house one night every week.

My mum buddied up with another single parent she worked with. They worked opposite shifts to each other so that me and the other child were almost constantly together, but alternated being looked after by each parent. This extended to having bunk beds in our rooms for each other.

She had no family around so this was the only way to manage.

THIS is what I've been dreaming of⬆...I wish there was a group for NHS workers to discuss this.
More realistically...is anyone working in London (GSTT/Evelina/KCH/StGeorge's?/C&W?) and wanted to do mutual "sleepover" childcare? We have the space for a lovely colleague and their one/ two small kiddos to stay! DM if this sounds like you
I love my job but being pushed out of it by circumstances😩

The NHS workers I know:

1 - has moved into a more 9-5 type role, still based in hospital but not on a ward any more. On site nursery open 7.30-6.30 so she uses that.

2 - does 2 fixed days of the 12 hour shifts, her DH does all the childcare runs those days and makes up his hours the other days she isn't working

3 - does mixture of days and nights but DH / grandparents pick up childcare runs as required

Realistically I think option (1) is going to be your best bet - my friend is on her 2nd such role now, they do exist in hospitals as well as the community.

I think looking for a different, specialist role - for example working in specialised clinics, or out in the Community, or in GP practice, or as a school nurse - has to be the way forwards.
Have assumed you are a Nurse and no a paramedic or something, from you saying your Mum and sisters and Nurses 'too').

Stumbled across this thread. We are both NHS nurses. I went part time in unscheduled care (NHS24). It’s all unsociable hours I do and I went up a band- so I know make the same part time as I used to make full time. I do 3 evenings or weekends a week. DH works opposite to me full time.