Depression in teenagers

[Daisylily]

Hi
if your child has depression, what help have you received, how and is your child improving.
at wits end with DD. Has all the symptoms. Refuses to talk to anyone or see anyone about it.

Op - what is her screen time like?

Very gently say that they have the symptoms and it is a very common symptom not to want to face or deal with the illness but it is an illness and as her mother you have a duty of care towards her and want her to co-operate with getting better.

I believe in loads of easy, tiny interventions. Start with diet. Cut out sugar, add vitamin supplements (especially Vit B complex, Vit D spray, magnesium and herbal iron supplement) and lots of mood-raising foods: nuts, turkey, dark chocolate, salmon, bananas etc.

Exercise is vital - drag her out for a walk in sunlight every day, or get her to do a yoga with Adrienne with you.

Buy some CBT for teens workbooks and do a page or two a day. She will resist. Point out she doesn't have to like the work or believe it makes a difference for it to be worth doing.

Make sure she bathes or showers at least every other day. Help her keep her room clean and aired and tidy.

Line up lots of feelgood stuff to watch together on TV - comedy shows, upbeat music and nature videos, TED talks etc.

Help her plan a small thing each day to look forward to, a bigger thing each week, even bigger each month and one major thing a year.

Ask her to trial doing affirmations, meditation etc and to keep a journal about which of all these interventions helps her in any way. Gratitude journalling works if done the right way. Not 'I should feel fine because I have XYZ, but I feel shit but at least I also have XYZ. Get her also torecord all her achievements, however small, to challenge any black and white thinking.

None of these are cures but they create cracks in the surface of the depression.

we are in this situation currently. Several phone calls to the GP, young minds, the crisis line but they have all said that they cannot help unless son is willing to engage in help (he’s 15). So either he accepts help, recovers without professional help or gets admitted to A&E in a mental health crisis. It’s totally rubbish! Nobody will come to the house and nobody is willing to help. We are on our own with this. Young minds gave an extended phonecall which was really helpful however, full of good advice. We also realised that our sons mental health rests fully on our shoulders. We grasped lots of small opportunities to engage him with walks, art and cookery within the house. Anything that he finds interesting! Lots of watching films together. Small part time job walking dogs. Consistently ensured he was awake at 9am. No screens at night. Enabled him to see friends when he was up to it. However we have kept the GP in the loop and after suicidal thoughts have finally been referred on to teen counsellors. It’s been a nightmare to be frank.

@Gwen82 dreadful. Tried to set limits but she’s worked around them. Trying to get back on track with it. Spends hours on Tik tok.
@WinterFoxes wow some great ideas. Thank you so much. Feel like I can do something to help.

Also recommend blood tests and some teen anxiety workbooks and teen mood diary (Amazon).

First thing to do.

Is address the screen time. Fast and hard. And unequivocal.

and small incremental easing up on condition that help is agreed to

@Blablablablablablab so sorry to hear. It’s just such a horrible situation. Hope you make some progress.

The positive thing is that he has started talking to me more about the issues and this is a step forward.

Screen wise you can purchase a sim from parent shield which will give you some screen control.

Also book phone call appointments with the nicest GP at your surgery and do loud speaker phone calls with GP and your child in your child’s room. Even if your kid isn’t willing to talk, seeing you explain the situation to the GP might help him feel less apprehensive about opening up (eventually over time).

Thank you so much everyone.

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that is a terrible idea because if somebody doesnt want to talk they shouldnt be pressured and you should not tell others about their situation. Imagine trusting someone enough to tell them something and they tell someone else, especially someone like a GP. I've experienced this as a youth- somebody telling a GP about my mental health when I didn't want them to know. I attempted suicide. Absolute bullshit idea