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Original poster

Did I really send that email to in-laws??

87 replies

Alittlebitfunny · 20/02/2023 19:55

Massive cringeworthy parenting moment....
I was searching for an old email and found one to my parents in law nearly ten years ago. They used to have my then 2 year old for one day a week. It's polite but lonnnnggg....and sets out a number of very detailed "requests" around potty training, snacks and daytime naps. I can't believe I sent it!

Both poorly these days. I always let them know how appreciated their company was but I wish I could apologise for that email!!

OP posts:

pictoosh · 21/02/2023 06:56

OP - quite sure, yes.

At the risk of being torn to shreds as some sort of negligent mother or a ‘know it all’, I wasn’t anxious about leaving my babies with loving grandparents. I trusted them implicitly, having had babies of their own.

In my particular case, there was no need to provide a list of instructions. They were perfectly able. I was glad to hand mine over and enjoy baby free time.

Love the poster with the ring binder and the sections though. Lol.

Adrelaxzz · 21/02/2023 06:57

Calphurnia88 · 20/02/2023 21:12

Another who doesn't think it's that precious or outrageous, depending on how detailed the instructions were.

Just before DS starts nursery they've said they'll ask us for a rundown of his daily routine. Family too far away to provide childcare but if they did then no doubt we would need to give them something similar.

MIL left us a one page document when we looked after her dog for a few days. We were really grateful for it!

@Danioo you've made my morning. Did you spell out Scaramouche? 😂

BiasedBinding · 21/02/2023 08:07

I was happy to leave my children with their grandparents and have child free time. They also wanted a written list of reminders. Both things can be true.

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Potty training

throwa · 21/02/2023 09:26

I did this when I left my children with my mum - signs of tiredness, when they liked to have naps, when they had a poo on the potty (very regularly once a day, they were both most efficient!) etc etc. She was happy to have it as she didn't have them very often so although quite competent and confident didn't know the detail of their routine.

What made both of us laugh though was when we were going through old drawers in the house, and found a note that she had left for her mum when Granny was looking after me, so 40+ years ago now, with exactly the same type of information on!

GonnaGetGoingReturns · 21/02/2023 09:36

I’d apologise to them but do it in a jokey way next time you see them “I found an old email I sent you years ago when you kindly looked after DC and what was I like?! PFB mania etc”.

I’d also include a lovely bunch of flowers/ or box of chocs.

FfeminyddCymraeg · 21/02/2023 09:58

Another one 🤚 who left an embarrassingly long list of how to look after DC1 - entitled ‘A Guide to DC1’ 🙈

I found it when going through my late grandmother’s belongings, I’m not sure if she kept it as a reference guide or something to look back on and laugh.

I do have big handwriting but it extended to couple of sides of A4. I cringed so hard when I found it that I almost turned myself inside out 😂

Sweetleftfood · 21/02/2023 10:44

In a way I wish I had done it with one of our nannies, who claimed to have had lots of experience of children (had references, but probably a lie from friends etc) met them in the park after work and he had his nappy back to front and no shoes, he was walking at the time, probably about 2! no biggie but it was autumn and not that warm.

Luckily with MIL she is a natural so no need and I was always very happy for her to do whatever worked for her.

Creamteasandbumblebees · 21/02/2023 11:36

Danioo · 20/02/2023 20:32

I cringe when I think about a similar note I gave my friend, including writing out the lyrics to bohemian rhapsody in case she didn't know them, as that song always settled him.

She asked if I was joking, said I wasn't and she heroically didn't laugh and just nodded.

She's the best

This had me howling! 🤣🤣🤣

Parisj · 21/02/2023 11:54

I strongly suspect I had a ringbinder with plastic wallets

LaFemmeDamnee · 21/02/2023 11:56

CornflakesOnTheSolesOfHerShoes · 20/02/2023 20:40

My sister did this for me when we had her baby daughter once. It said something like “10.30am - put her down for a nap”, and I looked at my wide-awake niece, scoffed, and put her in her cot. Two minutes later she was sound asleep, as though she had also read the instructions.

My two were napping refuseniks and didn’t operate like that. Maybe they would have if I’d written more detailed notes!

My friend had twins who were like that. I looked after them - bottle at 2, nap 2.30 - 4, said the instructions. They started crying for their bottles at 1.59, were out for the count by 2.31 and woke up at 4 on the dot. I genuinely couldn't believe it.

LaFemmeDamnee · 21/02/2023 11:59

I left some fairly simple instructions for a (paid) babysitter when I had to leave DD at short notice. She told me at the end of the day DD hadn't stopped crying, then relayed an account of the day which made it clear she'd disregarded everything I'd told her. So fuck her.

My kids aren't that big but I'm well out of the baby years, and if I was caring for someone else's child I'd be happy to be told when they slept, what they ate etc. Why make life more difficult than it needs to be?

Catsstillrock · 21/02/2023 16:52

Ha yes when I first went back to work DH was doing one day and new nanny three.

both over confident where DD needed consistency and routine.

so I wrote a schedule and asked the nanny to test and check it as DH needed it.

and asked DH to test and check it as nanny needed it.

everyone got into the routine believing they were just helping me out with the other one 😉

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