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2.5 year old behaviour -help please!

13 replies

exhaustedmumm · 19/02/2023 11:55

My son is 2.5 and has always been very energetic. Compared to other children his age wherever we go he is always the one running off, bolting off, always wanting to play chase, hide and seek and always wanting to grab or play with everything in the space he's in. He is happy but very very full on. He never sits quietly or does colouring or anything like that. You can't take him into a shop unless he's strapped in the pushchair as he'd go crazy. We've never been able to walk along holding his hand as he will bolt into traffic so we use a bag with a reign attached, or keep him in the pushchair until we are in a totally safe space like a field with a fence! We try to find ways to let him run off energy outside as much as possible , go for walks outside, and we play with him as much as we can. My friend is an experienced childminder and says she's never seen such an energetic child and she understands why I always feel exhausted.

Anyway that's just for context. I'm sure there must be other children like this but wherever I go my son is the one who stands out. Has anyone else had a child like this? How did you manage their behaviour as they got older?

My son has been doing toddler football on Saturdays in the park as a way to let him participate with other children and let off steam but I've got to the point where I can no longer face taking him as he completely sabotages the activity for everyone each week, running off with the cones, running away, jumping in front of the instructor, rolling on the floor in front of other children so they can't do the games etc. I know he's only 2.5 so I'm not expecting perfect discipline, but the other toddlers there do manage to participate. In a class of 15 he stands out.

He also does NOT listen and I really don't know what to do about this bit because it's about safety. He will run into a road, or into someone's private garden and not stop.

I have tried shouting, stop, but he ignores and finds it funny.

He gets lots of love and affection from both his parents. We don't shout or raise our voices in anger but we do try to teach him what's appropriate and have clear boundaries and be strict when needed.

At nursery he's rough and tumble and comes home with scratches on his face sometimes. The nursery staff say it's normal for his age group. It's quite free flowing there and I'm not sure if a more structured pre-school (when he's 3) would be more suited or if that would actually make things worse and he would push back. Does anyone know?

I get he's one of life's extroverts and I can cope with how exhausting it is, but how do I help him learn to listen when it comes to safety?

I know he's still young but I'm worried he's going to be seen as the "troublemaker" as he progresses, and I don't want that for him as he's a gorgeous happy open-hearted soul.

Any tips gratefully received!

OP posts:
exhaustedmumm · 19/02/2023 13:35

Hopeful bump

OP posts:
Holly03 · 19/02/2023 13:38

Have nursery mentioned anything? My son was the same at that age and is being tested for autism and adhd because he was so hyperactive. He had been like that since he was 1, they tried to telling me it was parenting but when I put him in nursery they couldn’t cope either so they pulled the educational psychologist in to assess him. He may just be a very hyperactive little boy and they don’t like to label them so young, I would ask your health visitor for some advice

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 19/02/2023 13:44

My Gds was like this, and still at 6 needs a lot of running around time. He’s a normal happy little boy, doing fine at school, but has always been something of a human hurricane. I think it’s quite normal for some - if not quite a few - boys - they’re like the sort of dogs that need plenty of exercise. 2.5 is very young still - please try not to worry. It does mean plenty of taking them out to work the energy off, though.

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Pinkfrogs45 · 19/02/2023 13:47

My sons best friend was just like this. Now a more chilled out 6 year old and cheeky but not a trouble maker.

i still think about the amount of times my friend was chasing a very fast little toddler. It’s like he was a dog that saw a bird, just use to bolt!

he grew out of it eventually, nothing in particular they did per say

There is a song about boundary’s on you tube, never to early to start teaching boundaries for you, him and other people.

Rainbowclimbinghigh · 19/02/2023 14:44

My DD was like this.. on the go since a baby really... and now at six, we are pursuing an ADHD referral.

She has calmed down a bit, but is still very energetic and impulsive and has worse meltdowns than when she was a toddler. She is very easily distracted at school and constantly told off for talking.

We are also considering an ASD referral due to certain behaviours.

exhaustedmumm · 20/02/2023 13:50

Oh gosh, how do I know if he has a special need?

OP posts:
Sartre · 20/02/2023 14:14

Meh, there’s a lot of emphasis placed on SEN on Mumsnet by armchair doctors. I think at two years of age, this behaviour is completely usual as the nursery staff have said. Trust them, they have lots of experience with this age group!

I have 5 DC and my youngest is like this, he never really stops moving, even in his sleep. I’m not concerned at all because I know this is just how some toddlers are, it doesn’t indicate SEN.

emma9112 · 25/08/2023 19:58

Hello! I’ve just come across your post and I am in exactly the same situation as you with my boy! He is 2 years and 9 months. He won’t sit still ever and he runs everywhere! I have to keep him in his pushchair other wise he runs off it shops with not a care in the world that I’m calling him or that he can’t see me. He runs off into the road and just doesn’t listen he does his own thing. He’s so good at home, don’t get me wrong he’s full on playing all day etc without sitting down but as soon as we go out he runs everywhere and doesn’t listen! He’s really good when we go out for meals or in his pushchair but if he’s on his feet it is such hard work! I’ve also started my boy with football and he is the only one running around not listening to what the task is and picking all the cones up and stomping on them. I know he’s only young but I should think he would listen a little bit but he doesn’t. I am praying sometime soon he starts to listen and slows down a bit. All my friends toddlers at a similar age just aren’t like this my boy is the only one. I feel like I’ve been so good with him so he should know right from wrong etc but nothing seems to work.. praying it will get better soon

ForLovingTealSheep · 03/08/2025 20:04

exhaustedmumm · 20/02/2023 13:50

Oh gosh, how do I know if he has a special need?

Hi any updates please

ForLovingTealSheep · 03/08/2025 20:05

emma9112 · 25/08/2023 19:58

Hello! I’ve just come across your post and I am in exactly the same situation as you with my boy! He is 2 years and 9 months. He won’t sit still ever and he runs everywhere! I have to keep him in his pushchair other wise he runs off it shops with not a care in the world that I’m calling him or that he can’t see me. He runs off into the road and just doesn’t listen he does his own thing. He’s so good at home, don’t get me wrong he’s full on playing all day etc without sitting down but as soon as we go out he runs everywhere and doesn’t listen! He’s really good when we go out for meals or in his pushchair but if he’s on his feet it is such hard work! I’ve also started my boy with football and he is the only one running around not listening to what the task is and picking all the cones up and stomping on them. I know he’s only young but I should think he would listen a little bit but he doesn’t. I am praying sometime soon he starts to listen and slows down a bit. All my friends toddlers at a similar age just aren’t like this my boy is the only one. I feel like I’ve been so good with him so he should know right from wrong etc but nothing seems to work.. praying it will get better soon

Hi any concerns of SEN

LouLa7 · 20/02/2026 11:15

Hi! I know this is an old thread but I could have written the original post. How is your son now as I’m going through the exact same with my boy 😩

emma9112 · 20/02/2026 20:44

Hi LouLa7,

My boy has just turned 5 now and all I can say is wow it was rough until he was about 4.5! He has been such hard work I really did think he maybe had some for of ADHD. He still has his moments but is good for 99% of the time now! It’s been a long road! I found myself crying myself to sleep some nights because he just wouldn’t listen to me and constantly running off etc! I have no idea why but as he got older he just starting listening more. How old is your boy? X

LouLa7 · 20/02/2026 20:54

Thank you so much for replying!

He’s 2 years and 7 months. He’s just dropped his nap as well so his emotions are all over the place, but he’s always been super high energy to be honest. I always feel so embarrassed in the classes that I take him to because all the other children are calm/listen and I’m usually the one chasing him around, him not listening to a word I say and the cherry on top being that he also finds it hilarious. I had to carry him out of the gymnastics class today, virtually upside down because he was having a huge meltdown and was throwing his wellies at anyone who got near him. I have a daughter who is 5 and she never did any of this so it’s been a shock to say the least 😂 I didn’t believe the ‘terrible twos’ to be a thing before now!

Holding on to hope that there might be light at the end of the tunnel in a couple of years 🤞🏽😅

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