What is considered 'normal' nerves when in a new job

[rubberchicken100]

I'm really struggling with anxiety and worry in my new job. My partner thinks I'm being a bit OTT about it and that it takes time to settle. That's fine, I get that. But what is considered normal in terms of how you're feeling? I literally feel sick at the thought of going in on Monday and I literally want to burst into tears each morning. I'd say im pretty hating the job but I don't know if this is normal and I just need to settle .

Any thoughts would be welcome xx

What is causing the nervousness? Not having the skills you need? If so can you find out how to do things online in the evening or weekend?

Shouldn't need to work out of hours.

What specifically are you worried about? What support is in place?

I don't think it is normal to be in tears though.

OP - more info is needed here. How long have you been in this job? If it's six months then this is very not right. If you are in the first week or two then nerves, even severe, are to be expected.

I'm heading into my 6th week. It's a job that I've never done but you get fully trained. I just feel the learning is endless, lots of pressure and I don't enjoy the work. I hate feeling this way and which I could be more positive and think of the benefits but all I have is fear and dread about Monday.

Are you generally an anxious person or is it just surrounding the job?

Are you generally an anxious person or is this feeling new? A bit of anxiety is to be expected but being on the verge of tears isn't. Do you feel underqualified? Are your colleagues so far fine? Is the role completely different to anything you've ever done before?

I'm 8 months in the job and can honestly say at around 6 months I started to feel more relaxed and less anxious. I was in previous job for 10 years.

I don't think this will improve after 6!weeks. This will begin to really affect you. Can you leave

The role is something I've never done, but I did the interview and took me on knowing this because the training was provided. No I'm not normally anxious, was a bit nervous at the interview and I suppose in situations were you'd expect to feel nervous. I just thought I'd have settled a bit better at this stage that's why I was asking

Partner is very supportive but keeps telling me that it takes time, and that I'm not giving myself enough time and that 6 weeks is nothing. 😢

If I'm being truly honest I only began to 'get' my job at the 6month point. That's when I felt completely comfortable. But at 6 weeks whilst there were some nerves I wasn't on the verge of tears. Remember that if they're training you fully then it's going to be a lot of information to digest and you won't be completely perfect at the 6-week point. Are you completely on your own or is the training support adequate? Do you feel like they're being patient with you as you learn or have they dropped you in and expect you to swim? I reckon in your position that would make a huge difference.

Having totally changed my job last year it took me a good 6 months to feel comfortable....even then I had set backs. You need to cut yourself some slack!

For context it's a 3 mth training programme but you're learning whilst on the job of that makes sense, so while I am training, it's basically doing the job with people helping but it's phone lines so you're constantly putting customers on hold to find out information if that makes sense.

I am an anxious person. I have had 2 new jobs in the past year. I stayed in the first one 6 months and am still in the second job. I had no previous experience for either job.

For a few months I felt very nervous leaving the house to go to work but I was ok once I arrived. I have not cried. Crying would not be normal anxiety for me, it would mean the job was not right for me. After 3 months I am alot more settled but it is around 6 months that everything starts coming together in a positive way. At this stage the relationships I have with colleagues is stronger and my confidence at doing my job is also better.

I think if you are crying something is not right with this job. Do you have a supportive boss? Could you speak to them about how you are feeling?

It can be a good 6 months. 6 weeks isn’t long.

If you can afford it, get a short course of CBT, it can really help.

I hate my current job. It's been 6 months and I'm well qualified for it. My wise 15 year old has told me to give it 9 months as that's how long it took to grow her and look how well she turned out!

6 weeks is nothing. I'd say it takes at least 12 weeks to get the hang of most jobs- even the (on the surface) simple ones. But be kind to yourself. Your colleagues will not be expecting you to reinvent the wheel, just try your best.

I am qualified and trained for my job..

The first six months I cried every single evening to my husband (same department at the time but he was much senior) - he was like "what on Earth is wrong with you?" 😂

Then one day it clicked and I relaxed.

The first six months though? Wow. Baffled. Hated it.

@mrsoodles this is exactly me. My partner thinks I'm going crackers. He's like "rubberchicken, it's only a job what can be so bad" he doesn't seem to be able to comprehend how bad I feel. I just wish I knew if it would get better so I knew whether to stick it out.

I'm week 8 into my new job and feel exactly the same. People keep saying I'm doing well and they can see the difference in my department already but I have typical imposter syndrome and this is what makes me anxious.

Stop looking at the end of the training whenever that is, look at achievable short term targets and bring your sights down to the end of the day and the end of the week.

I reckon I stopped feeling terrified after maybe 3 months in the job? Still get stressed out but not all the time any more.

I've had Monday fear all my life. Crying every day is a different thing.