Teach me British slang

[mrsdaresee]

Hi all. So I have been living in the UK since 10yrs. I do speak good English but being south Asian the accent shows. I have never worked and so do not have had the opportunity to learn more of British way of speaking. But not as my DD has started going to the nursery I have to speak with the teachers and admin staff. I feel a bit embarrassed by the way I'm lacking in knowledge of the British slang Example - when I meet a teacher they randomly say Hello You okay? Or You alright?. By the time I reply they move away??? Is this just an extension of Hello? Like you say Hello you okay? And move on or should you wait for an answer? So even If I say yeah I'm fine, should I be asking them how they're doing as well? Also when my GP says Hello how are you today? What should my typical response be? I'm fine doctor! Or should it be I'm fine and yourself?( I fined it weird asking the GO about his health). Also please do give me more ideas of such common greetings and how do I not look like an ignorant fool when speaking to the other person.

You don't need to learn slang.

These are mannerisms.

Greetings all depend on context.

"Hiya. Alright" said in a quick breezy way is just an extended hello. The person saying it is just expecting "hello" or a similar in return. An equally breezy "yeah, good thanks" (and no more) whether or not your are feeling good is also fine. It's a greeting usually done in passing to an acquaintance or colleague.

In a setting where you're not simply passing someone, like you're waiting in a queue next to someone you vaguely know, or waiting at a school pick up, and someone says "Hi, How are you?" or "Hi, You ok?" then you'd respond with a little more. A "I'm good thanks, what about you?", or often people expand with a brief superficial comment, often referring the weather such as "yeah, not bad, I'll be glad when the weather warms up a bit though".

Only if you know someone a bit better would you ever expand, depending on the depth of the friendship and the situation.

Actually re-reading what I wrote, if someone said "hiya, alright", you wouldn't literally respond with "hello"... That would sound a bit odd, though not crazily so. You'd either mimic and say exactly the same back, or shorten it to hi or hiya, or say a quick "yeah, good thanks", or possibly "yeah, good thanks, you?" which doesn't require a response but which might elicit a "yeah good".

"Hello" isn't really a greeting used in passing. It's more used when you're welcome someone, such as to your house "hello, come in!"

It depends where in England you're living as to what slang you use. Where I'm from "y'alright?" literally just means hello. If someone said that phrase to me I'd respond with something similar. I'm North East England (specifically Teesside/North Yorkshire), its different everywhere :)

Londoner now in Kent.
"Y' alright ?" is really just hello and the response is the same.
Slightly more formal is " how do doing?" Or " How's it going?" Where response is usually either " good thanks, you ?"
or " yeah I'm ok" if things aren't brilliant.

If you use Twitter, have a look at @soverybritish (Very British Problems) which gives amusing cultural and linguistic insight.

I favour a brief response at nursery -
How y'doing?
Good, you?

You don't expect a reply.

With friends you might be more honest but quickly put the emhasis back onto them -
'Really hectic at work at the moment, but can't wait to hear about your holiday'

I’ve never realised this! We don’t really use hello anymore do we?

Hi, hey, alright y’alright are standard greeting terms now. Hello has disappeared.

To you alright! Just reply yes, you?
no body actually wants to know if you are or are not alright 😁

Also when my GP says Hello how are you today? What should my typical response be? I'm fine doctor! Or should it be I'm fine and yourself?

Tell the GP you feel like shit, after all, most of the time that's why you are seeing them.

GP’s would love it if everyone said “yes, fine!” to their greeting. Make consultations super short and no need for any medical diagnosis. They could get through hundreds of patients a day 😁

Hello you alright?
Yeah good thanks how're you?

To me, ‘Alright?!’ With a head nod is a greeting. It’s a bit like ‘Morning!’
Are you alright? is a question
’hi, how are you?’ - fine, and you? Again - greeting/question combined. It’s just polite. A bit like work emails which say ‘I hope you are well…’ rather than launching into the reason for the email.
Real friends would want to know how you are, so that’s different- you can actually tell them!!
Even i find going to the doctor odd when they say ‘how are you?’ - I prefer them saying ‘how can I help you?’

I'd avoid slang! Or rather, I'd avoid setting out to incorporate too much slang in to your vocab. I'm sure you are using some inadvertently but don't go looking to use more.

I'm an English speaker but not English or British and I'd find some of the Yorkshire-isms listed above incomprehensible but I have a familiarity with British slang being in a neighbouring English-speaking country. But some North of English /Scottish dialect/ slang would genuinely be gibberish to other English speakers from further afield! so don't go there on purpose!