DS has just turned 8 and still wets the bed. We saw the Enuresis Clinic 18 months ago but had no success as he would sleep through the alarm and also refuse to drink the required amount of water (1.4L) by two hours before bedtime. Agreed with the nurse that we would leave it for now and try again later when he is prepared to engage.
Fast forward to about 8 months ago when he told me that he would like to go back to the clinic as he wants to stop bed wetting; so, back on the waiting list, have just had the first appointment two weeks ago where the lovely nurse explained everything required to him and he said yes, he would try it all. But, all to no avail. He just won’t bloody drink during the day and will instead try and guzzle large volumes of water around 6-7pm so he’s absolutely flooding the bed (I don’t always catch him doing this otherwise I would stop him). Even when not allowed to drink he still wets (as expected).
He doesn’t respond to reward charts, he just doesn’t care. I wet until I was 14 so with this family history he is likely to follow the same. He is terrified that his classmates will find out, hence I suggested let’s get you dry before Year 5 and residential etc which he is keen to do.
One obstacle is the dirty school toilets and I believe (as does the nurse) he is withholding drinking to avoid using them, and then on the weekends/holidays he is out of the habit of drinking so he doesn’t despite constant reminders (or will take small sips when I stand there and insist).
The nurse said dirty school toilets and not drinking is a common problem at both primary/secondary level and she is happy to write to the school on our behalf (anonymously) and tell them to address the situation (or something to that effect- I’m not sure what she says exactly). She said she often has to do this and somehow the schools do address it; she also said it’s likely to be 2-3 boys who have not been taught how to use a toilet properly/cleanly or being deliberately revolting (main issue is faeces on seat and floor, wee sprayed everywhere). She said I can also contact the school but they’ll probably label me as ‘that parent.’ I have spoken to 5 other DM’s of his friends and as soon as I said the apparent state of the toilets and not drinking they all said absolutely yes, their DS’ don’t drink or hold number two’s until they get home to avoid the toilets.
I guess I’m asking has anyone else had their DC refuse to help themselves get dry at night / drink at school and what did you do?
DS says he tells staff when the toilets are dirty and they will clean them but why should they have to do this during the school day?