Complicated childhood, spent first five years in and out of care of various sorts. I think some of it was social services but some of it was more informal, ie just left with various neighbours a lot of the time. My mum was in and out of hospital and Dad disappeared for days at a time. +++ domestic abuse.
My mum very sadly now has severe brain damage and can’t communicate with me on any meaningful level, and very little contact with my father.
I have no regular contact with anyone who could talk to me about those days, or remember it properly. I can remember 15-20 different names who cared for me over the space of a year, but this was 25-30 years ago and most will have long since moved away or potentially no longer living.
Social work have told me they don’t hold records longer than 5 years so can’t help.
One lady thought I remember taking me in a few times was also my brownie leader when I was a child; and would have known my mum well. I know she still lives in the same village and we have mutual friends, and I keep wondering about messaging her and asking if she would mind talking to me a little, just if she remembers taking me in and why.
I’d be scared she might think I’m after something or needing help she can’t provide (I’m getting help and support, it would almost just to be get sort of verification that what I remember of my early childhood is correct) but I’m not sure.
We certainly haven’t spoke for sixteen years which is a very long time and I don’t want to message her out of the blue asking difficult questions.
Would it be wrong or unfair to contact her?