Tips for 2.5 year old not able to self settle to sleep anymore

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My 2.5 year old has started being really clingy at bed time and specially wanting me to hold his hand and sit with him whilst he falls asleep. I haven't got the heart to leave him but I am reluctant to continue this too long as he was fully able to settle himself happily to sleep before this.

I have made sure to give him loads of attention and play time together in the afternoon and lead up to bedtime, and a lovely bath time and reading books, so plenty of quality time with me.

An experienced mum suggested I should just tell him I'm leaving and leave the room and let him cry himself to sleep and to expect a hard few nights if this before he adjusts. She says he's too old to keep going in and out of the room, which is probably true. However I hate the idea of him being so distressed.

Has anyone else got any tips here?

Mine did this a few months ago, similar age. I just held his hand until he fell asleep for a couple of weeks, it was much less effort than him screaming for ages. Then I started telling him I needed to go to the toilet/get a glass of water etc after a bit and left him with a nightlight and a book. Sometimes he'd start crying after a while so I'd go back in and hold his hand for another few mins, sometimes he'd just fall asleep. Now when I put him down I leave the nightlight on and tell him I just have to go and do a few bits and he just falls asleep the vast majority of the time. I think it was fomo to be honest, he thought we were having a great time without him, so I had to tell him we were all going to bed. No idea which but actually worked, or whether it was just a phase, but it only lasted 3-4 weeks and now he is fine again!

Different people have different approaches but I know for myself that I can't leave him crying. I have tried it once or twice out of desperation in the past but he just gets completely hysterical quite quickly when he knows we're not coming which can't be good for him, and definitely isn't good for me!

We had this and i took ds out to choose a new soft toy and said that it was a special bear to help get him to sleep and look after him, ds is 16 now and the bear still lives on his bed. I think it helps to try and understand why he needs you there but i would try all the suggestions above and see.