I feel inadequate and can’t seem to function

[Iknownothing]

Just that really. Just feel like everything I do is not quite up to everyone’s expectations. I just get so overwhelmed that I just sit and can’t seem do anything productive. With my job, with my family all of it - all these people around me seem to be able to function like normal people but it’s like my brain knows what needs to be done but then switches off and then things get left to the last minute. I know I need to send that email but I don’t - it’s not like I don’t want to but my brain just seems to find everything else to except the thing I’m meant to be doing.
I feel like dh just tolerates me being round and would leave if he could - he does most of the cooking otherwise none of us would eat properly.
I have no friends which is my fault because I’m rubbish at staying in touch or arranging to meet.
It’s not depression- I have nothing to be depressed about - nice house, job, dh, 2 dc who are no trouble.
This is not something that has come out of the blue - I’ve struggled with it for years - so long that it’s my ‘normal’ except I know it’s not normal as when I’ve tried to explain people don’t get it.
just had a mtg with my line mgr who is just so frustrated with me and I get it. I am frustrated with me to but I just don’t know what to do about.

OP
I'm quite similar and it's so disheartening.
I think it's ADHD, I've been waiting for an appointment for over a year :(

For the work things could you make a To Do list, would that work for you? Write your tasks on a sheet of paper and keep it on your desk then cross things off.

For everything else maybe speak to your GP. If you think it might be something like ADHD/ADD then mention that.

It sounds like you are being pretty hard on yourself. I can definitely relate to what you are saying, and if you are anything like me it is likely that no one is more frustrated with you than you are with yourself. We tend to expect more from ourselves than we would from others, so try and be kind to yourself.

If you are overwhelmed, it might be worth assessing what it is that is causing you to feel that way. Is there something you could outsource or get help with that might help resolve that? I find the more overwhelmed I feel the harder it is to get anything done, even things that appear simple. It's an annoying vicious circle that just adds to feeling overwhelmed.

I'm sorry I can't offer any helpful advice, but just wanted you to know you are not alone in feeling this way.

Thanks for the replies. I don’t think it’s adhd besides not sure what difference a diagnosis for a 50 yr woman would do and besides trying to get an appointment with gp is next to impossible.
To do list are made but ‘ignored’ or just make me feel worse.
For the most part I just bumble along until it all catches up with me.

I have adhd. 100% sounds like you do have it. I had no idea and even laughed when somebody suggested I had it. Look up adhd in women. It's totally different to children and men.

ADHD or peri menopause/menopause possibly?

I'm struggling in a similar way.

I'm investigating/experimenting with HRT.

Also an app called Todoist.

I'm implementing strategies that make it harder for me to fail. When I order a prescription, I put the date in my diary about when to order the next one. I took half an hour to go into my email account and set up some rules so there's less to deal with there.
It will be different things for you. But take time to do some things that stay done, so there's less firefighting to do!

I'm similar, and I have ADHD

I feel similarly and always have done. Menopause has seemed to affect all my ways of coping, or at least giving the impression of functioning, that I have built up over years. But I can relate to all that's in your email. Since I'll need to work for at least another 15 yrs I am trying to pursue an ADHD diagnosis, just in case any medication can help me. And if not then I will focus on organising strategies, and just carry on the same and accept that I'll never feel like I am on top of stuff. But I want to try and explore the possibility that it's not just me being rubbish at life as I think it might help me mentally to not be so down on myself.