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Original poster

Anyone awake? Can't stop crying this morning

14 replies

creepeduponlot · 07/02/2023 06:00

Yesterday I fell down the stairs and I'm in agony. It's just my coccyx so unfortunately nothing can be done to help. Pain killers aren't doing anything which is rubbish.

I've been up since 2am with DS age 6. As I usually am. I am tired out of my skull and I've tried laying on the sofa but he keeps coming up to me and kicking me. He lays down on the say sofa and kicks his legs out. It's excruciating

My 18 month old sleeps until 7.30 but she will be up and DS gets collected by school bus, and I feel like I will have 0 energy to give her organ than meeting her basic care needs

It's just a crock of shit. I am so tired. H has got a bad cold and already helped yesterday when I had a migraine so won't help me again today, he doesn't feel well. He's got a week off and planned it so he wouldn't have to spend his week off with DS on half term holidays

I just feel so far into despair I really do Sad

OP posts:
TibetanTerrah · 07/02/2023 06:08

You seem to have breezed over the fact your husband is an arse?

Original poster
creepeduponlot · 07/02/2023 06:09

@TibetanTerrah nothing I can do for now

OP posts:
HappyHealthy23 · 07/02/2023 06:13

Get DS off to school, turn on the TV and plonk your DD in front of it for a while. Just meeting her basic care needs is fine for today.
Have you got any friends or family you can call to come over?

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Original poster
creepeduponlot · 07/02/2023 06:14

@HappyHealthy23 thank you. I don't currently have a telly because DS broke the last one! But she is usually happy to crawl around playing with toys and is a ridiculously content baby

OP posts:
Zorya · 07/02/2023 06:15

Yup, you have a ‘D’H problem.
He won’t help you today, because he has a cold and helped you yesterday when you had a migraine? What a twat.
And deliberately books holiday for when your child is at school, so he doesn’t have to help out (or spend time with them) when they’re off? I’m assuming you don’t get a week to yourself at any other point?
I'm sorry you’re in such pain and with no rest. I wish I knew what to say to make your DH see sense, but sounds like he’s pretty selfish.

wandkands · 07/02/2023 06:15

Can you get some stronger painkillers?

Zorya · 07/02/2023 06:17

Agree with PP though. Make your life as easy as possible with your LO today. Fed and clean and napped is all she needs.
Good luck.

HappyHealthy23 · 07/02/2023 06:24

I presume your DS has additional needs? Is there anywhere that can take him for a few days over half term?

Original poster
creepeduponlot · 07/02/2023 06:26

@HappyHealthy23 I've honestly tried but no. He needs 2:1 and respite not currently available as nobody to have him and take on any hours offered

OP posts:
BananaBlue · 07/02/2023 06:32

That sounds shit.

have a huge hug from me.

Your sons 1:1, would they come over (paid) for an evening? Just for partial respite?

Your husband is shit but you know that. Hopefully you have a list of tasks/chores for that week off. He can still do a lot of childcare.

maybe you can spend the night in a cheap hotel?

Original poster
creepeduponlot · 07/02/2023 06:36

@BananaBlue thank you, nice to hear someone else say it too

He no longer had a 1-1 as he is deemed as needing a 2-1 so he currently has nothing as I can't find anyone/local Council can't find it Sad

OP posts:
IWannaKnowWhatHappensNext · 07/02/2023 06:58

PPs have covered the husband issue, so I won't add to that. But I will say that my other half fell down the stairs and broke her coccyx a few years ago so I sympathise. Not much they can do if you've broken yours, but stay alert to any pins and needles you might get as you should get checked out by a doctor if you get those. Also, have a look for a doughnut cushion or similar on Amazon - we've got a wedge cushion with a hole in the back - sitting on that can really ease the pressure and discomfort 💐

EffYouSeeKaye · 07/02/2023 07:08

Do you have family you can go to for a couple of nights? Take dd, leave ds with your partner and go and get some sleep and recovery time? He can rest while ds is at school.

goldennotyetoldie · 07/02/2023 07:35

Morning OP. Firstly, an unmunsnetty hug for you. A big squeezy one.

If your DH is still in, I'd wait until the school bus pickup, have some breakfast, and then put the baby in with H. Immediately decant to the bathroom and go for a long hot bath with the door locked. Shave your legs, take an iPad in (if you have one) and watch telly in there, or listen to music or a podcast on your phone (headphones preferably). Give yourself,a good half hour soak.

Ignore plaintiff cries of useless husband. He'll cope. It's your turn to be selfish.

Get dressed, clean teeth, and go out for an hours walk, longer if you have the energy. Leave the baby with him. No discussion, no explanation, no arguing. Just quietly get your stuff together and walk out of the house. Decompress. Look at the sky. Let your thoughts run. Sit on a bench. Watch the busy world go by. Breathe.

Then when ready go back home. Eat lunch and have a quiet afternoon dozing, listening to your favourite music. Shut yourself and baby in the lounge surrounded by toys. She'll be safe and happy.

Some serious wafting around is needed.
If he gets shouty, ignore him. I mean literally ignore him. Like you're on stage in a play and he's an invisible character. He'll get the picture of how angry you are with him. Silence is powerful.

And take it from there.

I hope you get some respite soon xxx

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