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If you didn't need to work, what would you do??

71 replies

NewFriday · 06/02/2023 17:12

I'm 53 and financially I could retire. I have a decent job that I enjoy some of the time, but also find at times frustrating and others boring. It gives me quite a bit of status, which I do enjoy Blush

I think the fact that I know I don't need to do it, doesn't help. Knowing you need to do it for the money probably keeps most of us going more than we realise at the time.

So I'm starting to seriously think about retirement, but where do you get that sense of value and importance, the feeling that you're needed from if not work?

I've done some volunteering in the past and whilst it fills time, I never felt it gave the same sense of achievement as worthwhile work, you're always just helping out rather than doing iyswim.

If you could retire young and fit, would you and what would you do instead of work?

OP posts:
Alexandra2001 · 06/02/2023 17:56

@popyourcollar Do you do grief counselling with CRUSE ?

SirChenjins · 06/02/2023 17:59

NewFriday · 06/02/2023 17:41

I have thought about that but I'm not sure it is the best of both worlds? I worked PT when DC were.yiung and never felt properly involved and you're still tied to work so don't have flexibility to just up and go.

I think it’s different when the DC are young - I worked p/t when my DC were young too, and it was impossible to leave them without a monumental amount of planning. I think even if you did volunteering or studying or any number of other things you’d still have commitments so wouldn’t be able to drop everything at a moment’s notice.

peanutbutter00 · 06/02/2023 17:59

Yes I would, only if I could maintain the same lifestyle though. I would spend time cooking leisurely, experimenting with recipes. Gardening, walking, yoga and reading. For fulfilment I would look at something like becoming a magistrate, and also spending time with my friends children and providing some childcare as I don't/won't have my own kids

AlisonDonut · 06/02/2023 17:59

I took early retirement at 53, have just transferred all my pensions to a personal pension plan which will give me monthly income. My OH did the same 18 months ago and we moved to France in 2021.

I garden, play with the feral kittens and cats, I grow food, I do yoga, and I have lovely days. I don't miss working in the slightest.

popyourcollar · 06/02/2023 18:00

@Alexandra2001 I take calls on the national helpline. But you can also volunteer with the local branches as a counsellor. Some people do both.

WildRosie · 06/02/2023 18:00

Help to train assistance dogs, whether they be guide dogs, hearing dogs or those who full-on keep their owner-keeper functioning.

Toddlingturtle · 06/02/2023 18:01

I could also afford to retire, for the same reasons I suspect you can. I am 50. Retirement isn’t even on my radar, and you’re so young still. I would have a look for a different job. I might be slightly different in that I still have children at home but what keeps me going is that I don’t really want to touch my capital more than I need to. The more I work, the less I need to dip into the pot for living expenses and can use it for all the things which make life more enjoyable such a lovely holidays and experiences

Maraudingmarauders · 06/02/2023 18:01

I'd travel. Perhaps have a base somewhere else in the world so I could flip between, but mostly I'd seek out new places, travel new routes. Perhaps get a camper...
Of course that relies on endless money as well as no work, but that's how I'd want to spend my time.

UsingChangeofName · 06/02/2023 18:04

There are so many volunteering opportunities that really are important and challenging and make a big difference in the world.

I don't know where your interests lie or what your skills are, but what about becoming a Trustee (so many charities and organisations crying out for this sort of support).......a school Governor ....... a Young People's advocate when they are picked up by police, or in the Youth justice system..... or a mentor for youths who haven't had the best start in life..... or for care leavers.......or a magistrate ....... or working with an organisation such as Crisis or shelter or the Trussell Trust or Citizens UK, and campaigning for a better world ?

I'm heading towards retirement and want to walk more and exercise more and spend more time with friends, as many others have said, but there is so much about the world that I also want to spend time trying to change and, in my own small way feel I have made a little bit of difference in someone's life.

WinterFoxes · 06/02/2023 18:08

Travel! I'd go to all the places I want to go. There's a huge list. And I'd try to live abroad for a while in several of the places, for at least six months, so maybe on a voluntary work scheme.

I'd take up a creative project too - anything from writing a novel to relandscaping a garden or learning to cut and sew my own clothes (getting increasingly intrigued by this one.)

As it is, I work PT and have a very nice life with plenty of time for walks, coffees, fitness classes, occasional lazy lunches or days off mid week to go to exhibitions etc. but I certainly have to keep working if I want to travel. That's my major motivation.

33goingon64 · 06/02/2023 18:24

I'm nearly 45 with DC aged 7 and 11 and enjoy the balance I have now. I work 2-3 days at home for myself. I volunteer as a school governor. I keep house, run the DC's lives, exercise, meet friends. I can't imagine working FT but I also wouldn't want to have no work.

BookWorm45 · 06/02/2023 18:30

I'd try an approach that I read about in a blog:

2 days earning;
2 days learning;
3 days just for me

unsync · 06/02/2023 18:36

What aspect of your work gives you that sense of value and importance? It sounds like your sense of self is bound up in your employment. You might need to unpick that to have a happy retirement.

kerstina · 06/02/2023 18:49

I am not in paid employment . I had been a carer to my mom but last year she had to go in a home . What gives me purpose is visiting and still keeping a relationship alive with my mom by taking her out etc . Trying to make her days a bit brighter. Also housework and walking my dogs. Sometimes I swim .
Also trying to declutter by ebaying and taking stuff to charity shops.

WoolyMammoth55 · 06/02/2023 20:13

Hi OP, sorry for your loss.

I wonder if there's a sideways step you could take into (say) consulting or similar, where you could keep your professional status and purpose but go self-employed and/or super flexible?

E.g. a woman I was mentored by, at 55 she started a one-woman consultancy firm, hiring herself out for high hour/day rates to her previous company and others in the same area.

She was able to work remotely for months at a time, went Airbnb hopping all around the world and worked 5-10 hours a week. With the tax benefits of dividends vs salary her income barely dropped.

It's an amazing lifestyle if you can pull it off, and sort of the best of both worlds :) Wish you all the best.

Alexandra2001 · 06/02/2023 20:32

@popyourcollar I had CRUSE counselling many years ago after my partner died... its something thats always been in the back of my mind to do, it was a huge help to me.

I think i 'm going to have to do something about that.

Pencase · 06/02/2023 20:57

Dh and I own our own company - I work part-time he works enough for two people, we have met our pension goals but we need purpose. He gets a real buzz from his job. I get a welcome distraction. Not sure I could work for anyone else though

Chillininfragglerock · 06/02/2023 20:59

Travel

Chillininfragglerock · 06/02/2023 21:00

Oh lord just read all your posts op
Sorry to learn about your dh

SleepingStandingUp · 06/02/2023 21:07

What sort of volunteering work have you done? There's different types.

What about something like scouts where it's quite active, there's extra bits like camps etc?

Victim support or Samaritans where you're directly helping people?

Could you look at getting a DIFFERENT job so it's less pressure, or a different kind of pressure?

Chasedbythechaser · 06/02/2023 21:19

I'm not in your position but my FIL was. He actively increased his social activities dramatically before he retired. He got very involved in a local society that he was interested in joining and became the chairperson of it. He volunteered to do free legal work for an organisation. He organised trips for people and now pretty much runs it with the help of another couple of volunteers. He became busy independently of his wife. As he got older, he kept up with the ones he enjoyed the most. Best of all his friendship circle grew and to this day he remains interested and interesting.

dudsville · 06/02/2023 21:29

I don't know what i would do in your situation. My plan is to retire early, but that is based on my husband being around and things we want to do together. Other than that i plan to enjoy waking up and just feeling my way through the day, experiencing time differently, but I'm not sure that i would want to do that if I'd lost him. I do think about it, and i wonder if i would choose to move. I live in a wonderfully quiet and boring small village and wonder if i was on my own if i wouldn't rather have more going on around me for me to take part in. But i will step working once I'm able just so i can live a few years, hopefully, according to my own rhythm, and that's meaningful to me. I suppose for you you'd need to find what's meaningful to you.

JoonT · 06/02/2023 22:04

Volunteer. I’d raise money for Cancer Research UK. And I’d like to help some kind of mental health charity as well. The way we treat the elderly in this country is shocking - I mean the general contempt we have for them. So it would be great to run a coffee shop where lonely old people could go for a chat.

I‘d definitely get involved in animal charities. I loathe cruelty to animals. It’s one of those things that I just can’t bear. I’d also volunteer to walk dogs for people who live alone and have become ill.

Right now, I work hard doing something that is of no use to society, and which does nothing but enrich a small number of greedy assholes. To spend my time actually helping people instead would be wonderful.

Other than that, I’d set myself some reading targets. I’d read all of Dickens’ novels, in chronological order. Or maybe I’d read the complete works of Jane Austen. I can think of countless books I’ve always wanted to read but never got round to - The Canterbury Tales, Jude the Obscure, Madame Bovary, War and Peace, To the Lighthouse, Lucky Jim, Bleak House, Moll Flanders, Jane Eyre, Wuthering Heights, Brideshead Revisited, etc. I have never read a word of H G Wells, or Siegfried Sassoon, or Iris Murdoch, or D H Lawrence, or Joseph Conrad, or Walter Pater, or Henry Fielding, or John Ruskin, or Proust. I did a literature degree, but my ignorance is limitless.

I’d maybe do some evening classes as well. I’ve become very interested in science as I’ve got older, so maybe an A Level in biology or chemistry or something like that. I’d also love to study Russian and learn the guitar.

My advice would be to get into a routine. Wake up, eat a healthy breakfast, do some yoga and meditation, read for a couple of hours, have lunch, go for a walk, then spend the afternoon gardening or studying Japanese or practising the piano, and so on. Above all, do something good, something that helps other human beings and makes the world a slightly less horrible place. It will make you happy.

NancyJoan · 06/02/2023 22:12

Volunteer at Maggie’s once a week, meet friends for walks/coffee/lunch, see more of my mum/MIL, have a tidier and cleaner house (maybe), do a writing class, maybe an art class too.

Rainallnight · 06/02/2023 22:13

Go back to university. Definitely.

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