What causes a 'fixed' mindset ?

[skimpychipswithsauce]

I have just realised I have a fixed mindset, something I'd never heard of before. It's really affecting my new job because the stress of failure is becoming insurmountable and I cannot understand why it's effecting me so badly. My partner on the other hand has a growth mindset so he takes on new challenges easily and just does his best with the view that you learn to do something over a period of time, where I instantly feel sick, stressed, overwhelmed and anxious when I cannot do something. Why is this?

I'd be so keen for someone to explain this to me and tips on how to change my horrible mindset

Anyone?

You might find this an interesting read:

www.futurelearn.com/info/blog/general/develop-growth-mindset

often our fixed mindset, and I don’t believe any of us are completely one or the other, comes from fear and past experience.

Dr Carol Dweck wrote a seminal book about this called Mindset. Worth reading.

Also check out Impact Theory on YouTube - Tom and Lisa Bilyeu centre their message around the fact you can change your mindset. It’s motivational stuff.

Plus some examination of your childhood and parental relationships would be good to weed out where your fixed mindset comes from. So maybe therapy, to have space to unpick things.

Mostly it is fear of failure, fear of judgement, fear of the unknown,
poor self esteem or fear of losing control.

It will be different and unique to each person

When I worked as a coach / mentor, that was my main niche, I helped people grow their business, stand up for themselves at work and get promotion, create courses and get funding to deliver them, end toxic relationships, move cities, achieve degrees, changing careers, etc

They all had degrees of fixed mindset in common and were the ones getting in their own way - with work around self awareness, they overcame what was holding them back.

I think sometimes it's down to how risk averse you are, which often comes from lived experiences of taking risks being something which doesn't pay off. This could be from childhood, eg. Having a parent who had multiple failed attempts at entrepreneurship, or multiple failed relationships or house moves. Or even from taking small social risks at high school which didn't go well. Or it could be something in your adult life where you took a risk and it didn't pay off. It could be that you have a more realistic view than your partner, or that because of his optimistic outlook you have taken on the role of realism anchor for the family. It's common for one person to experience an emotion as excitement, whilst the other experiences it as anxiety. If you feel excited, you will be open to change and see new opportunities as a good thing. If you feel anxious, you will not be open to change and see new opportunities as a bad thing. But we need both kinds of people in the world. The people who think they can fly, and the ones who remind them about gravity. We aren't all meant to be the same. But if it is something you want to change it might be worth looking at what experiences in your life have lead you to view change in one way and not the other. Ideally unlocking this in therapy, but if you can't afford that just writing it all down and getting clarity about where your feelings stem from and which beliefs are fixed and which ones you can change.

I think some of this is a pseudo science. It’s very popular in schools at the moment and very useful in the right context.

However, I don’t think anyone is just either fixed or unfixed. It can vary from subject to subject. How you’re feeling at the time, context and at what point you are in life.

I think it’s worth always analysing why we make the decisions we do. I don’t think fixed is always bad (I’m fixed about fgm and mgm and nothing and nobody will change my mind on that - it’s usually the mgm that people try to explain and excuse) I’m open ('unfixed' about other matters and topics). Sometimes I sway between (my children's use and amount of screen time).

Context is key.

I thought growth/fixed mindset was yet another idea on the conveyor belt of all faddy ideas rapidly advancing towards "discredited" by peer-reviewed evidence status.

Learning styles are already in the "discredited" dustbin at the end of the conveyor belt of fads.

It's literally just can't do it yet, or from my childhood Sophie's Web try try try again. And the idea you can progress. Apparently created by praising effort instead of achievement. The theory goes praising achievement leads to a fixed mindset where you only want to do the things you are good at quickly so stops motivating you to try. Praising effort develops a growth mindset so you are willing to try new things in future.

It became a running joke in our workplace after a staff training workshop on the topic during an inset day!
The senior management were very keen on the staff having a growth mindset. This meant all hands to the wheel, stepping into each other’s roles at zero notice, double jobbing.
It was indeed a great way to learn new skills. But also a great way to cover chronic understaffing and stretch the lowest paid staff to the absolute limit.
Funnily enough the people who remained firmly of fixed mindset were the senior leaders 😂

A rational or irrational fear.

Mindset theory is to be approached with caution because it locates the problem of fixed mindset, and it is regarded as a problem within the individual and potentially absolves organisations from making structural changes because it's all, like, in your head.

It is why it is adored by right wingers.

Years ago, and I can't locate the article, a study of high achievers at, I think Harvard, showed them to largely of a fixed mindset.