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Original poster

Delaying vaccinations due to autism

109 replies

WorriedaboutThe · 04/02/2023 08:18

I have 2 dc with autism. Both present in a similar way for certain things. My 6 y o was late with vaccinations as reacted so terribly to going to the doctor surgery . Traumatic meltdowns and physical symptoms so we did the 8,12,16 w vaccinations but the 1 year and pre school ones were done at 5.5 years (after we had done a lot of work about it and he was able to understand a little more. In that time we relied on herd immunity temporarily. The gp agreed with us (she has now retired)

we are now in the same situation with our younger child although her meltdowns are even worse. The new gp is not agreeing and we keep getting texts and calls saying we need to book catch up appts. I’m not anti vax Im just delaying. We live in an area with high uptake of all vaccinations and dd isn’t at nursery etc (we home educate eldest too so it’s not even like germs are being brought home via an older sibling). I’ve explained to the gp that I can’t risk a severe meltdown (in the past they have resulted in seizures and other physical manifestations that have caused hospitalisation and further trauma ) I just want to wait a bit but the gp is pressuring me - can they actually take this any further and force us or am I still within my rights to delay ? As far as I can see researching online it’s parental choice ?

OP posts:
Boneweary · 04/02/2023 10:13

@mrscumberbatch11 to be fair, the OP was asking if she could be forced. The answer to that is no.

Others obviously have given their opinion, but the OP wasn’t asking if she was right to delay or not.

mrscumberbatch11 · 04/02/2023 10:22

Boneweary · 04/02/2023 10:13

@mrscumberbatch11 to be fair, the OP was asking if she could be forced. The answer to that is no.

Others obviously have given their opinion, but the OP wasn’t asking if she was right to delay or not.

Well, I did say that. Of course she can't be forced. But she knows that.

Boneweary · 04/02/2023 10:28

But she didn’t seem to be totally sure at the start of the thread Smile

can they actually take this any further and force us or am I still within my rights to delay?

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General health
Original poster
WorriedaboutThe · 04/02/2023 10:30

Yes I wasn’t sure as the old gp was fine with this and the new one isn’t (same surgery) I wasn’t sure if guidelines had changed I don’t want it to be seen as an issue where we could be seen as neglectful

OP posts:
Ionlydrinkondaysendinginy · 04/02/2023 11:05

It sounds like your passing all your stress and anxiety onto your children. I think it will be best someone else taking them

Original poster
WorriedaboutThe · 04/02/2023 11:13

Ionlydrinkondaysendinginy · 04/02/2023 11:05

It sounds like your passing all your stress and anxiety onto your children. I think it will be best someone else taking them

I’m not passing any anxiety on to them! I’m trying to be responsive to their needs and just delaying vaccinations not opting out totally. I was simply concerned that nhs guidelines may have changed with how forceful the gp has been. I’m trying to minimise their meltdowns as it is so traumatic and just to have them done at a later stage when we can use some aids that will be understood like picture cards etc

OP posts:
LapinR0se · 04/02/2023 11:17

Can you apply anaesthetic cream to the injection site so it will be absolutely painless and hardly noticeable?

Sirzy · 04/02/2023 11:18

LapinR0se · 04/02/2023 11:17

Can you apply anaesthetic cream to the injection site so it will be absolutely painless and hardly noticeable?

If you go down this route I would look for the spray instead of the cream. The spray works instantly which is easier for us than the stress of habing to keep the cream on.

AreBearsCatholic · 04/02/2023 11:22

I think your kids are exactly the kind of kids that it’s reasonable for herd immunity to protect. Vaccination is incredibly important but the costs to you and your children is just too high. I have zero expectations and understanding of the challenges of SEN kids but some of these replies are ridiculous and I hope you ignore them and post elsewhere.

Original poster
WorriedaboutThe · 04/02/2023 11:30

LapinR0se · 04/02/2023 11:17

Can you apply anaesthetic cream to the injection site so it will be absolutely painless and hardly noticeable?

Dd wouldn’t tolerate this as it has to be on for a while it would add to her distress. I’m not even sure it’s a needle phobia as such it’s more a different place/people/atmosphere just the whole situation and she’s always so stressed deviating from her routine and I can’t explain to her yet o think like ds, when she’s more able to communicate and understand it will be easier

OP posts:
LikeTheFruit · 04/02/2023 11:32

I'm trying to understand why you delayed the 12 month vaccines with your son and daughter. Were they having meltdowns even at that age?

toomuchlaundry · 04/02/2023 11:36

Do you go out much with your DC?

Original poster
WorriedaboutThe · 04/02/2023 11:38

LikeTheFruit · 04/02/2023 11:32

I'm trying to understand why you delayed the 12 month vaccines with your son and daughter. Were they having meltdowns even at that age?

With my son we took him and managed to get just one vaccine done at 13 months the nurse was the one who said it wasn’t safe to continue as his meltdown was so severe . He was then in hospital for 48 hours after as had some kind of seizure. So he was due the rest of the 12 m ones and then his pre school ones at age 3. We tried to take him for those and the nurse had to get the doctor who said no wait as there was a risk of injury to him or them .

dd was a bit late for vaccines due to covid but but by 12 months was showing signs of ASD and v similar to ds so we decided just to wait with her and not even try as she’s had severe meltdowns too

OP posts:
Original poster
WorriedaboutThe · 04/02/2023 11:40

toomuchlaundry · 04/02/2023 11:36

Do you go out much with your DC?

Yes we do go out but it is extremely difficult. Especially with dd. We keep trying but it seems 12m - 5 years is extremely hard for them. We persevere but only to a certain point and I’m not prepared to push them over their limit and risk the horrendous meltdowns

OP posts:
QuantifiedSpecific · 04/02/2023 11:43

Hold on. A nurse said that it wasnt safe to carry on with attempting to vaccinate a 13 month old baby? Seriously?

OP I have 3 ND kids and you seem very afraid of meltdowns and seem v anxious yourself. You are the parent and sometimes that means making them do things they don’t want to.

Theres more to this than injections.

Original poster
WorriedaboutThe · 04/02/2023 11:43

QuantifiedSpecific · 04/02/2023 11:43

Hold on. A nurse said that it wasnt safe to carry on with attempting to vaccinate a 13 month old baby? Seriously?

OP I have 3 ND kids and you seem very afraid of meltdowns and seem v anxious yourself. You are the parent and sometimes that means making them do things they don’t want to.

Theres more to this than injections.

Yes she wouldn’t carry on as he was screaming and vomiting and unable to be held still safely . There’s not ‘more to it’

OP posts:
Spikeyball · 04/02/2023 11:44

I think the best approach for young children or those like mine with no understanding is a quick in and out the surgery or in the car hold arm still and no messing about done by someone who is able to do it quickly and understanding of the situation. And then do something you know they will enjoy doing immediately afterwards. Sedation and anything along those lines is just going to add to the upset.

Original poster
WorriedaboutThe · 04/02/2023 11:45

And yes I m afraid of meltdowns because they end up hospitalised . It triggers some kind of seizure and they won’t eat or drink after. Both have been assessed by a paediatrician and had multiple tests etc but we’ve been told it’s just ASD and severe meltdowns

OP posts:
gogohmm · 04/02/2023 11:47

Honestly, at 1 you can distract them - use whatever it takes, I found chocolate buttons particularly effective. Yes my dd is autistic and yes I recognise the meltdowns that resulted in her blacking out, I get that but they are always bribable if you find their weakness

Spikeyball · 04/02/2023 11:47

If done quickly there is no time to get to screaming and vomiting before the needle goes in.

Original poster
WorriedaboutThe · 04/02/2023 11:48

Spikeyball · 04/02/2023 11:44

I think the best approach for young children or those like mine with no understanding is a quick in and out the surgery or in the car hold arm still and no messing about done by someone who is able to do it quickly and understanding of the situation. And then do something you know they will enjoy doing immediately afterwards. Sedation and anything along those lines is just going to add to the upset.

Distraction afterwards won’t work once they have entered the meltdown stage there’s literally nothing that can stop it it’s not like a tantrum or an upset they are almost in a different level of consciousness and it can last hours and hours and is followed by huge amounts of sleep and refusing food and drink . It can last up to 24/36 hours at worst

OP posts:
Itisbetter · 04/02/2023 11:49

Ds has autism and we delayed some jabs. He’s also had seizures brought on by being scared of the needle (NOT the vaccine). I would do it now myself and numb the skin ahead of time. There are more vaccines to learn to do with therapy later.

Sorry not what you wanted to hear but I think we made the wrong call.

HerbalTeaAndCake · 04/02/2023 11:49

Lizzy1328 · 04/02/2023 08:44

Sounds like it's you making it into a massive deal! Get it done then go somewhere with the child to distract them.

Don't be silly!

Op that sounds really so hard. Call the surgery and ask what they can do to help?

gogohmm · 04/02/2023 11:49

@romdowa

Yes you can, I've spent 22 years doing it. The trick is to distract before the full blown meltdown, I found chocolate works the best, more recently it's talking but she's an adult and you can reason most of the time, meltdowns are rare

Original poster
WorriedaboutThe · 04/02/2023 11:51

Spikeyball · 04/02/2023 11:47

If done quickly there is no time to get to screaming and vomiting before the needle goes in.

From walking in the door to a different place and seeing different people it starts it’s not at the point of injection

I actually don’t feel that this thread is helpful I wasn’t asking if I’m doing the right thing I know I am I was wondering if the guidance had changed as the gp was being so forceful. I’m not going to violate my children and induce a severe meltdown when I can wait a bit longer and do with dd what we did with ds and if that doesn’t work then I’ll wait longer

I also don’t think many understand what a meltdown is you can’t stop it once it’s started and these are really severe and cause physical problems bad enough to be admitted to hospital

OP posts:
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