Good, non-cringey icebreaker type games?

[Catnary]

I’m involved in a work team “Away Day” soon. I’m not the organiser, but I was asked today for suggestions as to how we can get people into the right frame of mind to feel relaxed about contributing ideas to the various discussions.

The group is about 20 people, all levels from very junior to the Big Boss. Roughly even split male/female. Ages from mid twenties to mid fifties. Everyone does more or less the same job, just at different levels of experience/seniority.

It’s all in-person, no remote participants. A few people speak English as a second language but we all work in English.

The criteria are as follows:

Nothing that requires sharing of personal information or feelings.
No popular culture references (so no trivia based on TV, or things like making people guess the celebrity name on a post it on their head).
Possibly with scope to poke mild fun at our work (eg jokes about the bad canteen food or the IT system) but nothing that singles out individuals.
No singing or dancing.
No putting people on the spot (eg “do the next line of this funny story”).
Competition between teams is fine, but more in terms of pooling points than making people work together to do things like build structures or make up a story.

Does anyone have any bright ideas?

My only thoughts (partly after Googling) were:
Pictionary on a big white board, with clues being “things”, actions etc rather than films, songs etc
Everyone writes their name backwards and someone reads them out, team that correctly guesses the most wins.

Does anyone have any suggestions of things you have enjoyed? We really really don’t want to end up with a backlash against “enforced fun” but there needs to be something to make it more dynamic.

PS this is not “AIBU to want to do icebreaker games” inviting a hundred comments about how the whole idea of away days and team building is bollocks. It’s just a plea for ideas!

Actually just realised most of the really negative comments here are from 2-3 posters so there's no point pretending many people think like them.

You know what else is horrible, sitting around in a meeting where only one or two people out of twenty bother to speak up

True but if you have a meeting of people who don't speak up, then I am not convinced an ice breaker can cure that. Especially if it involves speaking up. Maybe think of other ways of communicating, if it's really that bad.

I’m not talking about old school shows with someone holding up a card marked “Applause!”

Most studio audience filming these days allows the audience to choose when to laugh!

If you experience cringe at the prospect of speaking to and with your colleagues, to the point that you want to run away, go and work alone.

Again, 'speaking to your colleagues' is not the same thing as having to participate in ridiculous games more suited to a drama workshop or kids' party than a work meeting.

you're trying to get value out of the team who are employed to work there.

This is the nub of it really, isn't it? It's not enough to do the job you've been employed to do, to complete your work on time, to maintain networks and contacts, to keep your professional training up to date, to contribute ideas and insights. You also have to waste days of your life pissing about doing stupid games organised by people who don't know what they're doing, then you have to give up your evenings too, and you'd better be damn sure that you do it all with a smile plastered on your face to make sure your bosses understand that they are 'getting value out of you'.

There's been loads of threads on MN about ice breakers. The majority of people on here don't like them if those threads are representative.

I think the OP knew this hence the PS at the beginning.

I haven't got time to go back and read the whole thread again (I actually do have work to do) but if you have a look, you'll see there are at least 20 or 30 different people who have registered their absolute hatred of this.

Also boringly predictable that people piled on to do exactly what I asked them not to. I’m not sure why I’m engaging really.

Most studio audience filming these days allows the audience to choose when to laugh!

I'm not either. I'm speaking from experience and I'm not that old. You can generally laugh when you like but in some shows they ask you to cheer, go ooh or boo at certain points e.g When the big prize is revealed.

And there was no one holding up an applause sign but there was a quick rehearsal when the audience were asked to respond in a certain way at a few points during the show.

Helping plan for the future may well be part of the work they're employed to do. in fact clearly it is as otherwise this wouldn't be happening would it.

I'm often one of the only ones who'll contribute to meetings like this and I fucking hate THAT. Why should 10 people sit round on their arses silent as the grave, leaving 2-3 people to come up with the things that are a joint responsibility of all of us? To me it's no different to working on a team project at school or uni and half the team contributes nothing. It makes me shut up too as I can't be arsed putting in so much more work than some others.

(I don't mean people who are brilliant in other ways but find this stuff especially hard, I mean people who are perfectly confident in other areas of life but realise they can get through a meeting or planning day in perfect silence)

Presumably because they felt the need at all costs to intervene to stop us inflicting severe psychological damage on our team. Or maybe they are altruistically trying to stop us making a huge mistake that will damage our profits when the whole team leaves.

After all it surely can’t just be that they are too self-important to keep their opinions to themselves?

There's been loads of threads on MN about ice breakers. The majority of people on here don't like them if those threads are representative.

You're right and it isn't just a MN thing either. There's plenty of threads and articles elsewhere about how much people despise them.

And then they whine and complain behind people’s backs when the project goes ahead as planned by the others!

Again, 'speaking to your colleagues' is not the same thing as having to participate in ridiculous games more suited to a drama workshop or kids' party than a work meeting.

Exactly. I have no problem speaking to colleagues(Or wouldn't if I had any as I WFH) but I do have a problem with being expected to play silly games that add nothing to the event. It's entirely possible to do the former without the latter.

Coins - everyone takes out a coin and says something that happened to them in that year. Brief that it can be as personal or as light as they choose. Have had everything from "the year I started school " to "the year my marriage collapsed" so be clear there is no compulsion to disclose anything painful

@Defiantlynot41 I've just tried that one but in private because everyone else is at lunch. I had a 5p and a 1p in my purse but no one should feel sorry for me because like most people I pay for most things on my debit card these days.

Anyway, I got the penny which was minted in 2007. I cannot think of a single thing that happened to me that year though I know I had been born and was not in a coma. Would that count or would I have to make something up before we could all get on with our work?

All too often, icebreakers backfire. The triviality of the games easily insults people's intelligence and insinuates that these professional adults lack the social skills to meet each other on their own. Worse still, they may further alienate shy folks who don't like the spotlight. On top of that, icebreakers are often time-consuming and just plain boring. Some icebreakers even border on offensive and invade participants' personal space.
Nevertheless, you can bet out-of-touch group leaders will continue to force uncomfortable icebreakers on unsuspecting victims.

money.howstuffworks.com/business-communications/worst-ice-breaker.htm

Why not ask the team to read and comment on this article? Hours of fun for all!

I recently did 2 truths and 1 lie. The room had to guess which is the lie.

Obviously it's down to the individual what their truths and lie are. So they are only sharing what they are comfortable doing.

I enjoyed 3 brain teasers in teams, one was how did the scuber diver get into the Forrest picture.

I have a lucky sixpence I got from the Christmas pudding when I was small. That's at home so I don't know when it was minted but it was definitely from before I was born so there would be no personal anecdotes from that year.

But I could go and get it. It wouldn't be worth coming back to the officebecause everyone else would have gone home by that time. But I could bring it in tomorrow and we could play the game all over again before we start work.

My last suggestion was to @Defiantlynot41 but anyone who likes this kind of thing can answer it if they want.

When I go to big meetings, the 'icebreaker' is that we say hello to each other, chat about the weather, our journeys in that morning, tech issues, whatever's in the news... you know, the sort of small talk that exists and happens naturally and organically.

I have actually been on training courses where that conversation is all happening naturally and informally, and people are getting to know each other like human beings, only for the leader to come crashing in, stop all of the genuine chat that is happening, in order to force everyone to do a weird, awkward, pantomime version of it.

So weird. Such a fundamental misunderstanding of how humans actually relate to one another, and what works in terms of social dynamics.

Don’t people always say they got scooped from the sea by helicopters putting out forest fires? 🤔

I am always amused by threads like these.
I don't mind ice breakers, and I do sometimes use low key versions in groups to get people talking (usually a question related to the topic we are about to discuss though, to get people thinking about the topic coming up).

But I am amused by the number of people who one the one hand spend half of their life in this work environment, and on the other hand are highly offended that anyone might ask them a question that is too personal.

Maybe I have never worked in such toxic or unfriendly environments as you, but I just can't see why some of this is a big deal.

I like human bingo, no need to send stuff in in advance, you can just put generic stuff on there - find someone who owns 3 pets, someone who swum in the sea in the last year or whatever. You can make human bingo specific to the industry/job too.

Many of these are too long winded because you have to go all round the circle, and that takes forever with 20 people.

The problem I have with just having coffee and talking is that some people are equally quiet and uncomfortable in that context, and don't go up to people they don't know well.

and one way to get people's opinion without having to speak in front of the group, (and you could use as an ice breaker) is to use strips of paper. Ask for something, eg one thing which would improve communication within the company, get them to write it in large letters (so can be read from a distance) on the strips and then collect and put on the floor/table or on the wall.

Then ask everyone to go round and add a vote to those they agree with or a cross to those they don't.
Or ask them to put a tick on those they would like the meeting to discuss.
They have the discussion using the suggestions and the relative votes.

Thanks @steppemum . What you describe is already part of the plan.