How have you got your life together with a baby and going back to work?

[Goldi321]

Hi! I'm hoping for any tips and tricks for making our lives bearable once I go back to work. DD is 11 months and starting nursery and I will be working 3 days a week (but 12 hour days so won't really have any time on work days to do housework) and I've also got professional exams to do. Grandparents will hopefully take over 1 day a week once they have moved closer to us and are settled in their new home.

I love anything that makes my life more efficient and easier and am hoping for any tips and tricks that I can use to help me run the house. I feel like I'm just about holding the fort on mat leave, although the house hasn't had a proper clean for a long time as she is on the move now and causes chaos if I try to do anything.

Get a cleaner
Do you have a DP? Ensure household tasks belong to both of you.
If grandparents happy to have DC for some time on one of your days off, use the time to catch up on whatever you need to do.
Again, if you have a DP, tag team on weekends. I too am currently revising for professional exam so DH has taken on the brunt of weekend childcare to give me pockets of time to study.
Accept that you can’t do everything to the same extent you did pre DC. I don’t exercise as much and I don’t see friends as much as I would like, but it’s just how it is.

Batch cook on one of your days off so when you come home from your 12 hour shift dinner is done and you have freezer meals to take for lunch on your work days.

Could also prep a slow cooker meal the night before and food it ready as you walk in i the door.

This is the biggest help for me

@LittleMrsPerfect Do you know of any good slow cooker recipes? I've only found a few that work well, otherwise have found the food comes out really watery. The recipes that have worked well I've left out most of the liquid they say to add and just added the flavour instead (say a stock cube instead of adding stock).

Yes have a DH who is very good although in maternity leave cleaning has mostly fallen to me because I am the one here and also I use it as a break from the baby so would rather DH watches her while I can put headphones in and enjoy cleaning in sweet, blissful peace 😁

I have three and work full time. Planning is your friend here. My tips would be:

1. Get a cleaner
2. Get into a habit of tidying as you go along. Especially toys. We tidy a toy before the next one comes out.
3. Meal plan. And shop online. I order on Fridays for delivery on Fridays. Then I find a slot in the weekend to cook a few meals for the week.
4. Share the load with your partner/DH. I do drop offs and pickups three days a week. He does two. Specific days so I can plan work around it. Share all the rest in a way that plays to your strengths. I am a better cook. So I do that. He does all the washing up, emptying/filling the dishwasher. I plan weekends, he arranges all the bills and invoice payments. And so on.

I know a lot of this sounds prescriptive but knowing what falls in my area and what is in his makes us achieve a lot more in the long run.

Share the load 50-50. Every single thing!! This is the one thing that makes the most difference. I don’t mean just cooking/cleaning I mean the mental load as much. When they get to school age there’s so many things to remember.

Slow cooker, just don’t use as much liquid! Batch cook.

Lay everything out the night before.

Good luck! I’m a veteran now, I’ve been full time with 2 kids for 9 years and it’s daunting at first but gets easier.

I had high hopes when we decided to get a cleaner, but it has been a nightmare. I have tried multiple and they have all been unreliable and caused more trouble than they were worth, so I have now given up :-( On the cleaning side I now just lower my standards and blitz the house with everyone involved about once a month.

Work from home if possible - much easier to keep on top of laundry, dishes etc.

Supermarket deliveries, or go with the little one in the trolley if they enjoy it (mine did, and still does aged 4).

Fit in whatever chores you can with your little one - e.g. going to shops, bank etc. Make it normal for them to be with you/help as possible so you aren't stressing about trying to get things done.

Cook large batches - left overs for the next night, or freeze if possible. I also like slow cooker (reduce the liquid, as it doesn't evaporate off).

Tidy, mop spills, put things away as you go. Don't let it all build up and become overwhelming.

Make sure you and DH are on the same page re drop off/pick up etc, and share childcare when they are off sick. Be prepared when first starting nursery for a lot of sick days.

And again...lower your standards, particularly at the beginning! It will be really tricky to start with, particularly with nursery bugs, but after a while you'll get into a new routine!

OP, I’ve had some big hits with Taming Twins slow cooker recipes.

I also found a weekly laundry service to be a big help when I was working (back on mat leave now and the machine is constantly on!)

Adopt a policy of when you see it, deal with it immediately as best as you can. So if you spot a bit of vomit on the floor or a toy out of place, grab a wipe and wipe it up or pick up the toy. You don't need to go for perfection (full clean up) just enough to deal with it there and then as best you can. I've started doing this and it really helps.

If I see something and start to think 'can't be bothered, I'll do it later" I now think "No. My policy is deal with it now". It sounds a tiny thing but it really helps to stop alot of stuff building up and makes you feel like you are achieving micro-wins all day.

I’ll have a look again at cleaners. We had one for a while and it was great not having to think about the cleaning but this one was so careless she broke/scratched our stuff. She was also really scatty and always having a life drama so we’d spend ages tidying up only for her to cancel just before she was supposed to arrive.

It does add to the time slightly, but if you have a slow cooker which can be used on the hob then cover the meat in flour and brown it first - it’ll help the liquid thicken

If it’s a dish which can be served with pasta, throw pasta in an hour before you eat - it’ll cook within the slow cooker and soak up the water

Also looking for tips as starting back at work in 2 months

Implement the one touch method. Basics are you should only ever touch something once an example is a cup; you can pick it and move it to the kitchen next to sink. Then later you still see it and have to put it in the dishwasher. So mentally have to think about it twice.

instead the only touching it once you pick it up and put it straight into the dishwasher. It applies to all household objects, coats, shoes, cleaning products, kids clothes. Put everything in its place first time.

Get a cleaner.

When I went back and was out 7-730 I spent Sundays cooking for the week ahead for us and Dts. It was mind numbing my boring but saved a lot of stress. I was very lucky that grandparents did 3 days in our house.

I packed breakfast / lunch for the kids and left in the fridge, and dinner was taken out of the freezer and left to defrost ready for reheating.

Slow cookers are great but you need less liquid and way more seasoning, I have one that I can wear everything in on the hob before it goes on. They're not time saving imo but they reallocate time.

Clean as you go, wipe around the bathroom when you are in there, ditto kitchen, get a robot vac.

If you get on top of it now it'll be easier when they start school and you have random demands of last minute shit all the time.

Oh and if you're tired at 830 and the kid is in bed, go to bed!

Are play pens not a thing now then? I used to pop mine in there with a few toys while I ironed or did quick jobs?

I never add extra water, only sauce of the ingredients eg. beans/passta or water for gravy if stew.

www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/campfire-stew/amp

www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/slow-cooker-beef-stew

I also do a bolognese - no recipe - just add mince, all the veg, spices/herbs, passata and tinned toms thrown in on low for 8 hours. I don’t brown the meat.

iI often prep the night before and put pot in the fridge then turn slow cooker on in the morning.

Seconding the calls to get a cleaner, it's a big help here
Online groceries, same time every week, roughly the same stuff
Rotating meal plan, but flexible so a couple of nights you can have an easy dinner/leftovers
Use Trello or a list app to share household admin
Declutter - tidying up takes less time if you have less stuff
Protect your leisure time - both you and your DH need to have an equal amount of child free time at weekends to do things like exercise and socialise
Bags packed the night before
Dishwasher!