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Original poster

Why don't people do more to help society?

174 replies

Calmnesspersonified · 21/01/2023 15:13

I just went for a walk and it got me thinking about why people don't do more to help society. It's been raging on my local community facebook groups about why the paths aren't gritted (it's been really icy here) but there's no way that the council can do even a tiny percentage of all of them.

I grit my estate every time it's icy and don't understand why more people don't do the same. If everyone just adopted their street and made sure it was gritted in the ice and kept free of litter a huge proportion of the country would be litter free and navigable in the ice. I know that some couldn't get involved e.g. the elderly, people working crazy hours, some disabilities etc but millions more could.

Even if there's no nearby grit bin, a bag of grit doesn't cost a fortune and many people can afford a few pounds (I'm well aware some can't and that's understandable). Litter pickers can be as cheap as £2 and are often available for free from town councils. Sacks often are too.

It doesn't even have to take more than a few minutes. It took about 3 minutes to grit my road this morning. I went to the dentist on Monday and got there 15 minutes early. I picked up half a sack of rubbish outside while I waited (instead of playing on my phone like everyone else in the waiting room).

There's so many ways to help. Listen to readers at a local school, offer to take your neighbours kids/dog for a walk to give them an hour free, volunteer to go into a care home to talk to someone who doesn't get visitors, slip a fiver through the letter box of someone you know is struggling, give a fiver to the food bank, litter pick, grit your road etc. Why don't people do more. People say they don't have time but so many spend hours on their phone or watching TV.

I'm certainly no bloody angel but I couldn't sit back and do nothing to help my town. Why don't people do more?

OP posts:
cleanitup · 21/01/2023 16:02

I'm certainly no bloody angel but I couldn't sit back and do nothing to help my town. Why don't people do more?

Disabilities, specifically the kind you can't see which makes me the person you judge for not doing more.

Ted27 · 21/01/2023 16:02

@Calmnesspersonified

you might find this interesting, millions of people in the UK volunteer in some capacity, though numbers are in decline

I volunteer or give my time in several ways every week, its just not visible

www.gov.uk/government/statistics/community-life-survey-202021-volunteering-and-charitable-giving

megletthesecond · 21/01/2023 16:03

It depends where you live. I pick and report litter and flytipping daily. I was the only person who reported a sewage leak despite coming to it ages after it started. I live somewhere grotty.

Original poster
Calmnesspersonified · 21/01/2023 16:03

cleanitup · 21/01/2023 16:02

I'm certainly no bloody angel but I couldn't sit back and do nothing to help my town. Why don't people do more?

Disabilities, specifically the kind you can't see which makes me the person you judge for not doing more.

And I clearly said not everyone could do these examples due to age, disabilities etc.

OP posts:
MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 21/01/2023 16:03

It is still smug and self congratulatory to post about it on an anonymous forum.

Don't get me wrong, it's great that you do stuff. Please keep doing it. Just try not to judge how much other people may or not be doing as well, a) because you actually have no idea about what they may or may not be doing behind the scenes and b) because you don't live their life and therefore don't necessarily understand what factors might be getting in the way of them doing stuff. For some people, life is a struggle and it's as much as they can do to keep their heads above water.... they may not have the energy or the headspace to think about anything more than getting through the day. Be grateful for the fact that that isn't you!

HallwayDoor · 21/01/2023 16:04

Litter pick g shoot’s yourself in the foot when you can’t get it collected as you’re limited to say one rubbish collection every 2 weeks and this takes you over and recycling centres won’t take black bags any more. What do you do with the rubbish you collect?

Thelittleweasel · 21/01/2023 16:04

@Tamarindtree

Yes it is an urban myth. I was a town clerk once and we were instructed by our authority [Kent] that as long as we did a competent job [for example not pouring water that would freeze into a slide] we were perfectly able to clear snow and ice and apply grit [usually salt in any event]

Original poster
Calmnesspersonified · 21/01/2023 16:05

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 21/01/2023 16:03

It is still smug and self congratulatory to post about it on an anonymous forum.

Don't get me wrong, it's great that you do stuff. Please keep doing it. Just try not to judge how much other people may or not be doing as well, a) because you actually have no idea about what they may or may not be doing behind the scenes and b) because you don't live their life and therefore don't necessarily understand what factors might be getting in the way of them doing stuff. For some people, life is a struggle and it's as much as they can do to keep their heads above water.... they may not have the energy or the headspace to think about anything more than getting through the day. Be grateful for the fact that that isn't you!

My life isn't exactly easy either.

OP posts:
Original poster
Calmnesspersonified · 21/01/2023 16:06

HallwayDoor · 21/01/2023 16:04

Litter pick g shoot’s yourself in the foot when you can’t get it collected as you’re limited to say one rubbish collection every 2 weeks and this takes you over and recycling centres won’t take black bags any more. What do you do with the rubbish you collect?

Depends where I pick. Some goes in council bins, some goes to the tip, some goes in my Wheely bin.

OP posts:
MaxHeat · 21/01/2023 16:09

Calmnesspersonified · 21/01/2023 16:03

And I clearly said not everyone could do these examples due to age, disabilities etc.

Show quote history

But you don’t accept people leading busy lives and not wanting to spend the little free time they get relaxing as a good enough reason. God forbid anyone relaxes and doesn’t do a bit of gritting or litter picking before they relax after work/looking after children/helping out parents/looking after animals. 😂

strumpert · 21/01/2023 16:10

Your examples of volunteering that makes a difference are physical things.

How do you know if my "excuses" are genuine?

Kabalagala · 21/01/2023 16:11

I once litter picked on the green by my old house. Man from the council told me off for putting the bag of rubbish in the public bin. Didn't bother again.

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 21/01/2023 16:12

Calmnesspersonified · 21/01/2023 16:05

My life isn't exactly easy either.

Show quote history

I never said it was. Neither is mine. That's not the point.

MaxHeat · 21/01/2023 16:12

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

strumpert · 21/01/2023 16:13

You might think right now that I was being lazy sitting on my arse watching television and being on mumsnet.

I'm not. I'm on the edge of autistic burn out and meltdown so I can't go out and see people today. I need to chill.

Can you tell me how you would know the difference?

Beautiful3 · 21/01/2023 16:13

I think people did more community work, when the men worked 9-5 and the wives stayed at home. Today most wives go to work, juggling childcare and employment. Generally people work longer hours, commute further and have less time in their day. Also numerous women have children later in life, compared to years ago. This means many mums are faced with juggling childcare, work and caring for aged parents.

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 21/01/2023 16:13

Our grit bins have been empty for years and I am disabled. So physically couldn't even if I wanted to. DP would if they were filled. No amount of chasing our council gets them filled so what can you do.

Our NDN do litter picks and my DC join them on the odd occasion.

MaxHeat · 21/01/2023 16:14

I actually think OP is a bit of an anomaly. I know people who do various bits of volunteer work and they’re all genuinely nice people, not the judgey types at all.

Original poster
Calmnesspersonified · 21/01/2023 16:15

strumpert · 21/01/2023 16:13

You might think right now that I was being lazy sitting on my arse watching television and being on mumsnet.

I'm not. I'm on the edge of autistic burn out and meltdown so I can't go out and see people today. I need to chill.

Can you tell me how you would know the difference?

You need to stop now. You are deliberately hounding me. This isn't about you. It never was. It's about millions of people who could do more and don't. If you can't. That's fine. Others could.

OP posts:
MaxHeat · 21/01/2023 16:17

Calmnesspersonified · 21/01/2023 16:15

You need to stop now. You are deliberately hounding me. This isn't about you. It never was. It's about millions of people who could do more and don't. If you can't. That's fine. Others could.

Show quote history

But you told me I could and I can’t. You’re hounding and bullying others. Not the nice person you want others to believe you are at all.

strumpert · 21/01/2023 16:18

I'm not hounding you.

I'm trying to understand how you can tell what's going on in peoples lives so much so that you can confidently state that people could do more. You are judging people when you know nothing about their lives.

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 21/01/2023 16:19

Calmnesspersonified · 21/01/2023 16:15

You need to stop now. You are deliberately hounding me. This isn't about you. It never was. It's about millions of people who could do more and don't. If you can't. That's fine. Others could.

Show quote history

You're missing the point, OP. We know this isn't about any one individual. The point is that you have no idea what's stopping other people from doing what you think they should be doing, or indeed what else they may be doing instead. Maybe just focus on your own contribution and stop worrying about what everyone else is doing?

MaxHeat · 21/01/2023 16:19

@strumpert I hope you’re ok. 💐

Original poster
Calmnesspersonified · 21/01/2023 16:21

I am leaving this thread. Some people are deliberately misinterpreting what I've said. I'm also being accused of bullying which I've never been accused of in my life. I'm really upset that anybody would think that about me.

OP posts:
Salome61 · 21/01/2023 16:22

My neighbour is in his 70's, he went up to the grit bin with his wheelbarrow and shovel and did our road and pavements. I'm really lucky.